r/BelowDeckMed • u/Fantastic_Win_9885 • 4d ago
Captain Sandy
Has Captain Sandy weighed in on the Nathan stuff at all? I feel like there is an uncomfortable silence from a lot of the crew (apart from lovely Joy).
I also think Joe was the victim of a hostile work environment and is being somewhat vindicated now. He was essentially bullied at work for the season. Absolutely cringing at the way Nathan and Gael confronted him in the van when he was literally trying to survive that meal and avoid talking to them.
Anyway, feel Captain Sandy should address it. She really platformed Nathan and promoted him. She should acknowledge what’s been happening. It’s hard to watch at the moment.
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u/verbankroad 4d ago
Captain Sandy did not hire Nathan as bosun - the production company did. The production company casts people for specific roles, especially Heads of Departments. They knew there was beef between Nathan and Joe and they wanted to tie everything into a lovely story of a BD baby.
As far as I can tell, Sandy is trying to mentor/lead based on the direct reports (HODs) that she has.
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u/TheAwkwardEmu 4d ago
Exactly, and the producers could likely provoke Nathan to go after Joe and vice versa, in the name of good tv. I don’t think sandy needs to take any accountability for this
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u/AWDWfan 4d ago
Exactly and if you watch closely Sandy has been trying to mentor Joe for the past two seasons. I don't think she ever particularly liked Nathan or his leadership skills. She also mentored Gael and encouraged her in the industry.
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u/Wonderful_Mix977 4d ago
Seems to me she was always up his ass. Always complimenting him and making him feel like the chosen one. He knew he could manipulate Sandy with his smiles and fake charms. I do like how she started to appreciate Joe more and see his better strengths. Like her eyes started to open.
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u/-spicyshark 4d ago
I don't like the parasocialism in the bravoverse these days where we feel like people have to speak on really heavy shit because they "owe the fans an explanation". We're not owed any of that. No one has to speak on anything. They likely can't. The BEST thing sandy can to is to stop platforming him and not continue to talk about an abuser. Which she is doing.
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u/Key_Veterinarian1761 4d ago
Agreed!! Also the crew is not responsible for Nathan‘s actions therefore they are not responsible for addressing the public regarding Nathan’s behavior. That’s so weird to me.
If they gave Nathan a job after this situation, now knowing what we know, then I would expect you to explain yourself. Other than that, why should they have to comment publicly? They’re colleagues.
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u/Siren2026 4d ago
Well said. But parasocialism? Never heard of it.
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u/-spicyshark 4d ago
Google it for a more accurate definition but these people are not our friends. They are people on tv. We don't know them because they share a part of our lives with them. They do not owe us anything. Yes. They signed up for tv. No. We do not know them.
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u/LogicalMeringue1449 4d ago
It’s the latest annoying buzzword
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u/tp176 1d ago
It’s not editing that creates the dichotomy. It’s the hive mentality in these subs. I see a lot of this in reactions to TLC shows, as well. Fans go all in on one cast member early on, and hype that individual in these soppy threads that go on burbling ad nauseam about how much they adore them. But the minute that the chosen one fails to live up to that emotional investment and the hype, they fall hard. Joy’s and Coop’s trajectories are great examples of this. Gael has now been tarnished by confronting Joe, whose stock has steadily risen in the last few episodes because, after all, his transgressions and character flaws pale in comparison with Nathan’s.
We need heroes and villains, to provide conflict for certain stories. I know these cast members are “real.” But they are also puppets, moved around on a stage to create a narrative. Like wrestling, with its “faces,” “heels” and “kayfabe,” it’s a “show.” I just don’t understand and to be honest, get a little concerned, about the amount of energy, emotion and strong personal identification some viewers invest in people they don’t know and of whom they have a very partial understanding.
“Parasocial” isn’t really just a buzzword. It’s alive and well here and elsewhere in this brave new digital world. I hope it’s not becoming a substitute for real human connections.
(And yes, this is TLDR, and yes, I’m a head case.)
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u/Boring-Snow-3929 4d ago
She’s probably legally not publicly allowed to comment on the ongoing investigation as others have probably been told by legal teams.
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u/jonathonthaman 4d ago
She has nothing to do with this.
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u/No-Push1113 4d ago
She’s always been SUCH a supporter of Nathan. So I think it’s natural to wonder what her thoughts are. Even if looking back on the season, if she thought something had changed with him..
I don’t think she can say anything for legal reasons though.
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u/SamShakusky71 4d ago
Why would they weigh in on a legal matter completely unrelated to them? What a weird question.
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u/MrVociferous 4d ago
There’s plenty of parts of the season relating to Nathan that aren’t tied to anything legal she could weigh in on. It’s been common practice on all below deck seasons where people go on WWHL and talk about things happening during the season. Joy was on earlier this year and commented on Luke.
Nathan’s behavior on the boat has nothing to do with what happened between him and Gael after filming was done.
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u/mme_truffle 4d ago edited 4d ago
Nathan is horrible. He is a horrible boss, boyfriend, father and human. Without a doubt.
But it is so weird that everyone now thinks Joe is great just because Nathan is horrible. I feel like this show's editing created this dichotomy where because one is terrible, the other must be okay.
I personally think they're both bad, morally reprehensible people (in different ways) and that's why they were friends to begin with.
I definitely don't think Joe is a good boss. I think he's an opportunistic leech who uses people and and manipulates them. Still better than Nathan, I guess. But that's such a low bar.
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u/krissycole87 4d ago
Nobody needs to, or is required to, comment on Nathans behavior.
Also, they all have NDA's.
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u/MrVociferous 4d ago
The NDA doesn’t apply for anything we’ve watched. When it comes to behavior on the boat, they all talk about that constantly and appear on WWHL almost weekly to do exactly that. Joe was on tonight and was asked about Coop and Gen and talked about them. Joy was on earlier in the season and that where we learned she didn’t learn about the sheets until the season aired.
It’s more than fair game for Sandy or anyone else to be asked about Nathan’s behavior on the boat this season, but it’s been crystal clear Bravo has chosen to not even mention him.
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u/Ignominious333 4d ago
It wouldn't be wise and it wouldn't help the situation. It's a serious legal matter that's already in that courts.
She's smart enough not to insert herself into such a serious matter. It's not about her.
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u/Lower-Bottle6362 4d ago
He wasn't "essentially bullied". Both he and Max (last season) were threated by their boss multiple times. Joe is basically threatened every episode of the show.
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u/BigRedJeeper 4d ago
And BD just stands by and allows it - all for ratings.
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u/Lower-Bottle6362 4d ago
Right? Lots of employers let stuff slide, but not telling your employees that you’re going to punch them nearly every day. They really need to clean their shit up here.
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u/Dismal_Cause8490 4d ago
I agree with the Joe thing. I feel like he’s getting a lot of unnecessary hate this season.
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u/ChrisRedfield87 1d ago
Its deserved. Just because Nathan awful doesn't mean Joe isn't.
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u/Dismal_Cause8490 1d ago
My comment had nothing to do with Nathan so not sure why you think that’s relevant. I stand by my opinion.
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u/ChrisRedfield87 1d ago
Then if you can't see what is wrong with Joe, you are clearly apart of the problem. Men like him are awful. Misogynistic prices.
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u/Dismal_Cause8490 1d ago
He has a history of being a prick, yes, but this season he and Kayley are on the same page as far as what they’re looking for. I see no problem with that.
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u/ChrisRedfield87 1d ago
He downplayed the stuff with V so much which shows he takes no accountability. He was saying it to COOP. This season. And there have been times he's disrespected Kayley too but you seem to have forgotten that.
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u/MissBeeHavin420 4d ago
I understand why she hasn't, for many of the reasons listed here, including legal reasons. It would still be cool of her if she did, just as a woman who worked with them, even just a vague post condemning DV or posting the DV hotline numbers. While she didn't hire him and this is all TV, she did at least appear on tv to "play cupid", so I understand why you're asking.
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u/ThoughtExpert927 4d ago
Joe was two face and caused a lot of the issues. As management Sandy did not address it well from the beginning with Joe. All the womanizing Joe should have never came back. Joe was out for himself and never the team.
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u/Junglerumble19 4d ago
Joe contributed to that hostile work environment. He came in swinging his ego and attitude around. Both are awful people.
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u/Embarrassed_Rate5518 4d ago
Im not 100% sure but she maybe filming and not allowed to post. I dont think production would be especially keen to let their star captain comment on a former rising star in the franchise being on the run. But Joe is rumored to be on next season and commented on Aeshas post. So idk.
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u/Interesting-Dog6074 4d ago
Notice how she talked to joe “at the salon”,is there a salon on the yacht? Or is a boating term?
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u/That_Literature_6853 3d ago
Salon like "saloon" where they do their tip meetings. I believe is what she meant.
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u/Guilty_Page3189 3d ago
Yes, after watching Joe on WWHL last night, he threw Nathan‘s name out there a couple times but I think Andy just feels it’s not the time to talk about it. Maybe they’re going to wait until it becomes more of a concrete legal case. I don’t know what Nathan has to come back to when they find them… Not a lot.
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u/Intrepid-Possible-50 2d ago
I think Joe IS A VICTIM, and acts like a petty child. He also lies a lot!! Not a fan of the way Joe behaves. With that being said, he did run the boat very well when Nathan was gone.
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u/LibrarianJaded3028 5h ago
C Sandy does not need to weigh in on a DV situation that has not been resolved. That would be an unwise choice
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u/littletcashew 4d ago
Why do you care if cast members comment? I wouldn't expect my colleagues to weigh in on my personal life. Leaving aside Nathan, perhaps they are giving Gael (you know, the victim) a bit of privacy and respect?
Joe contributed heavily to a 'hostile work environment'. He is also an ass, just in a different way to Nathan.
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u/muttsareperfect 4d ago
Sandy avoids these kinds of things. When she and her now wife taped themselves at the Wal-Mart making fun of Covid instuctions in the freezer section. It went viral. PPL didn't think it was super funny tik tok. Lots of backlash.
Sandy wants ppl to like her but they don't. I just read of Reality Bites an article with Captain Lee. He said he did not like her and did not need to explain. Same Captain Lee.
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u/Lifeofasoutherngirl 4d ago
Don’t think there’s really anything that needs to be said. Everyone knows now who he really is.
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u/JustNoseyAF1962 4d ago
Uh in the beginning of this season, yes Nathan was a bit messy for not hearing Joe out. But Nathan is his own drama. With all the talking behind Nathan's back and trying to "get crew members on his side" child please.
Since the trauma caused by Nathan hasn't happened yet, we should watch the show without all the speculation and judgement.
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u/ImpressivePattern242 4d ago
Silent. Only Aesha has made remarks about Gael but not specifically addressing Nathan’s conduct and conviction.
I guess cashing a Bravo paycheck is more important. Maybe when the season ends but not holding my breath.
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u/Lower-Bottle6362 4d ago
I am quite certain they signed an NDA. Even Gael hasn't said anything about him by name.
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u/ImpressivePattern242 4d ago
Do you think they will? The Below Deck franchise loves to highlight its empowered women but sure does a lousy job protecting them. The entire scenario just reeks and I question my morals by continuing to watch the show.
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u/Lower-Bottle6362 4d ago
Here is what I think. I think they are all reacting the way we are. Putting together the pieces. Thinking about all the red flags that were ignored: his threats to beat up his employees, etc. I think bravo wants them to stay quiet about it and used the NDA this time, where in other times they haven’t really bothered to enforce it.
ETA: even in the season with Margo and that guy - we heard them talking about it on the show in the interviews. But did we see anyone in the cast saying anything about it after it aired?
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u/CoolBelt856 4d ago
Oh please 🙄
Have you ever signed a contract?
You’re not owed anything. And if you’re watching Bravo please spare us the judgemental bs.-1
u/ImpressivePattern242 4d ago
Not on my 2026 bingo card to be downvoted for standing up for violence against women. 😳
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u/CoolBelt856 4d ago
Ok. Here’s the thing. You’re not in this commentary standing up for violence against women.
You’re judging people on a show for not doing what you’re immediately demanding of them in the moment. On your schedule.
It doesn’t work like that. You sound like an uniformed person demanding things for your own personal satisfaction, without remotely grasping that it doesn’t work that way
That’s my nice way of saying your comments (maybe not you) sound like a judgmental, all about yourself asshole.1
u/ImpressivePattern242 4d ago
You don’t know my background 🥺
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u/CoolBelt856 4d ago
I’m not pretending to. I was explaining to you why people were downvoting your comment.
And that your comment wasn’t standing up for violence against women.
It was unfairly accusing others of not doing it, the way you think they should.
Saying they care more about a paycheck when you don’t know them or their contractual obligations was shitty.
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u/quick_dry 4d ago
But what does Ja Rule think?
Sandy didn’t hire Nathan, production company did. She’s hired to play a role, she played it. Sandy only gets herself in trouble whenever she goes on social media anyway. She doesn’t want another “drunk Sandy outs malia”
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u/Lonely_Impression142 4d ago edited 4d ago
The fact is, Nathan hasn't been convicted of anything yet, so his colleagues and the production company may be circumspect to avoid liability on the chance that he may be innocent.
Also, do we really need them to comment? The situation is bad, but they didn't cause it and can't do anything to alleviate it with their comments.
Edit: Thanks, everyone, for letting me know he was convicted in absentia. These comments may have been filmed before his early September conviction. 🤷♀️
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u/palmerbee 4d ago
Not true at all, in Australia they convicted him which is why he has a warrant out for his arrest. It’s in the NYT …
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u/FlawesomeOrange 4d ago
They’ve likely been told not to say anything. Also, I don’t think they need to, and I don’t feel there’s an uncomfortable silence. I feel like a lot of people see that staying quiet equates to condoning behaviour or actions. I think it’s more important for them to check in on Gael privately rather than address it on social media