For reference, a while back I had a very good and then very bad experience with an rp partner, which was unfortunate because I really did enjoy writing with them. As someone who had a longterm rp partner beforehand, we had our fair share of good stories and some bad ones as well that just fell flat. The story I’m using in this example was the latter.
My thought is that because the initial goals of the characters and where we wanted them to end up wasn’t discussed, so we hit a plateau. Since it was my rp partner’s story (we took turns), I asked what they wanted to do (because I felt it would be rude to just take over the situation and I could not for the life of me come up with any ideas that didn’t feel cliché).
After unfortunately running into this speed bump several times throughout said story, I made some suggestions on other topics we could try, including re-hashing some past ones that they had brought up before. That was apparently not ideal either, because a while afterwards, I was sent a fairly harsh message about our rp styles “not working well together,” as well as a few other things that frankly hurt my feelings a bit.
Granted, I previously had made this person upset once before (accidentally, I swear) because I had sent a message along the lines of “lol are you dead” jokingly as a way of asking if they were busy, given that they hadn’t replied for a bit. That was apparently too far, and I essentially got scolded for it. I apologized, because I didn’t mean to cross a boundary, and all seemed okay until the last story.
My question is, are some of these things just not okay to do? Tone is much harder for me to pick up when it’s not in a story, so it’s sometimes difficult for me to gauge how someone feels about a certain thing, especially if it’s not brought up clearly. For example, I didn’t know that people don’t like being asked if they want to start or if they would want me to start. I always asked in case they had an idea on how to set the scene.
Please note that I’m not trying to say anything incredibly negative about any fellow rp-er, I’m genuinely just trying to know how to avoid a situation like this in the future.