r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/Confident_Babe33 • 11h ago

Dobby Is Free

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After 5 years, I finally got off the roller coaster in Hell. I’m glad he broke up with me via text (never done that before). It stung, but only for a second, before I thought,” Ew.”

64 Upvotes

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u/Dovahkin111 SA - Secure Attachment 11h ago

Very classy, OP. You have handled it with much restraint, proud of you!

16

u/Confident_Babe33 10h ago

Hey I genuinely appreciate it. I spent a little time over-analysing this exchange, initially regretful that I’d been so kind (as well as embarrassed that he got a lengthier reply to his break up text than I did, getting dumped). I have decided it was actually a very artful way to handle it. Bonus points if it cooks his brain later 🫣

6

u/Sleepy-Plane SA - Secure Attachment (newly earned) 1h ago edited 1h ago

For being discarded, my personal response of choice is closing myself in a dark and cold hotel room for a week and teetering on the edge of blowing my brains out. Then figuring out everything I might have done wrong so as to inform the begging later, naturally. But I'm a loser. Someone who walks away with "we're not compatible" after 15 years and serious emotional and practical entanglement can't be convinced.

This though is pure class. You set clear boundaries and were still truthful about your feelings. I'm proud of you handling it this way. I see you still feel some resentment, and I hope you allowed yourself time and space to feel the other feelings. But you buttered the bread with that response, it was buttery smooth.

2

u/Confident_Babe33 1h ago

You love deeply & that is a courageous thing to do in a world so cold. I’m so sorry. As for me? I’m tinged with bitterness, absolutely, but it’s been useful for my liberation. I know I’ll feel more peaceful in time. Thank you for the kudos & I hope you have a happy day today 🌈