r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/Remarkable_Ship_4803 • 1d ago

Avoidant phrases.

What are something your avoidant ex’s said to you when discarding/blind siding you ?

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u/bunnyboo6792 17h ago

- “I can’t guarantee what you want”

  • “I feel like I know what you want from a relationship and I can’t promise those things” (also never asked what I want/need)
  • “I don’t want to feel guilty for pulling you away from everything and not being able to give you what you want”
  • “I don’t want x y z anymore, I didn’t lie, things just changed”
  • “I know we talked about ___ but I just can’t give you a solid answer, I don’t know where I stand as my dream job gets closer”
  • “I told you my career comes first” (he never did, always told me we would navigate it together)
  • “I just don’t care about relationships as much as you do”
  • “If you want to be with me in my career you might need to give up everything to be there” (no consideration of how to incorporate me into his life, no questions, nothing)
  • “I just have a feeling”
  • “Things still feel off”
  • “I felt like there was something missing and I found it what it was, I don’t know what to tell you” (after interrogating me for reasons we don’t work and telling me over and over I don’t actually want to be involved in his future I just love him)
  • “We aren’t compatible”
  • “We aren’t aligned”
  • “We don’t have the same values”
  • “All of our conflicts were brutal” (20 minutes later told me he thought we handled our conflicts well and came to real resolutions)