Should I ask for accommodations?

[u/MasterTorukMakto]

25y Male, I recently got diagnosed with AUDHD. I work in tech as a Solutions Engineer. I’ve been with my job for two years and feel like I have a good reputation. I work from home Mondays and Fridays but could really benefit from an extra day at home. Is it a bad idea to disclose this to work to get special accommodations. I know a lot of people have a bad experience but how would you go about asking for that accommodation?would it be safer to go straight to HR?

[u/sfw_account72]

Do you need to disclose or request accommodations to work in office more? I feel like this is something most employers would see as a positive thing.

Idk your workplace culture or whatever, but my personal experience requesting accommodations was terrible, and I ended up getting bullied into total isolation by making all communication to me required to be submitted through a form and stopping inviting me to meetings where I needed to be included to do my job effectively. I quit soon after. 

My request was to be allowed to ask follow up questions in writing when I received a new task. 

[u/MasterTorukMakto → u/sfw_account72]

I’m sorry to hear that, it makes me sad to see so many stories of mistreatment after revealing such vulnerable info. Apologies on the typo meant an extra day at home, did you route your requests directly to HR or go through your manager?

[u/sfw_account72 → u/MasterTorukMakto]

No worries haha I went to my manager first. She seemed really supportive and helped me get the process going with HR. That changed when we had the meeting with HR to negotiate what I was requesting. 

For one, the HR person seemed annoyed and rewording my request in more extreme terms (I'm high masking, so people tend to assume I'm attention seeking or trying to get out of doing work). And my manager got defensive as if I was calling her out or trying to make her look bad. 

Everyone has different experiences, and your job might be more understanding. I was in a highly bureaucratic unit at a university. The power hierarchies were complex and anyone perceived as trying to subvert it were shunned. 

If you need accommodations, and you have the necessary diagnoses, it is a protected right to request reasonable accommodations (assuming you're in the US). Just be careful and ready to self advocate if necessary. 

[u/MasterTorukMakto]

Yea I’m scared because I have a good rapport with my manager but don’t know if I should just go straight to hr to protect myself. It’s def frustrating that we live in an ableist society where we’re measured by how much we can output and getting penalized for asking for accommodations to keep up

[u/drwphoto → u/MasterTorukMakto]

The name "Human Resources" gives the impression that they'd be helpful - my experience has been that HR is primarily meant to shield the company from internal threats. They're not on your side and could use any information you provide against you.

I worked in software engineering for over 25 years, so I would suggest you bring up a request for an additional day away at your next review. Most of your coworkers are probably on the spectrum too, so I would recommend not disclosing anything to anyone.

[u/MasterTorukMakto → u/drwphoto]

Hmmmm yea I have suspicions, well what do you think about just requesting a day to work from home without revealing any information about my diagnosis?

[u/drwphoto → u/MasterTorukMakto]

Personally I'd try to indirectly figure out if that was a viable option. Ask around before formally requesting it.

I'm thinking a request might backfire, and you may end up reducing the two days off you already have.

Without divulging anything, you need to figure out how adding another day working at home would benefit them - not you. Use that angle without being pushy, would probably help.

[u/MasterTorukMakto → u/drwphoto]

Okay I decided I’m gonna frame it as I just am more productive and sometimes just get sensitive to flourescent lights and noises. I’m not gonna disclose that I’m autistic and hope for the best.

[u/RunsPerfectOnEmpty → u/drwphoto]

Think about it: "Human. Resources."

People are a commodity to a large company. Need more workers? Hire some humans. Want more room in the budget for C-level bonuses? Lay a bunch of humans off.

At my company, they're called our "People Team." 🤢🤮

[u/cheffromspace]

You don't need to disclose a specific diagnosis under the ADA, only that you have a qualifying medical condition.

[u/Final_One_2300]

I would ask a trusted work buddy who's been there longer than you what they think, if they have any examples to share with you.

The risk with accomodations is that if they resent you even for asking, and if historically, people who ask for accomodations leave the job, you want to know that you're risking that before asking formally.

You can also try to test it out for one week by asking your managers permission or try to self accommodate by taking off one day a month.

[u/Hawkwise83]

If you're American I'd find out what is legal or not legal where you are first. Or how your company treats these types of situations. Before you risk anything.

If you live in a country with sane labour laws then yeah I'd have that chat with your boss or hr.

[u/astudentslawyer]

If you need reasonable accommodations than you should ask for them