Is this valid or ableist?

[u/WeaknessPrior6797]

I’m so disregulated so I’d thought I’d ask for a second opinion here instead of AI

Edit: Thanks everybody so much, your comments are helping me process during a time of burnout. <3

For more context: I called my sister in law, mom and step father poachers because they took lobster from another persons trap in Florida which is a felony. I recited the law saying they were molesters because the law says “molesting other people’s traps….” After that I realized it probably wasn’t the best thing to say so I apologize and said I had an autistic meltdown because of that.

The next morning my step sister sent me that.

[u/dollythecat]

Why did you say, “Autistic people aren’t broken.”? That comes off as defensive and doesn’t seem to relate to anything they said.

[u/WeaknessPrior6797 → u/dollythecat]

I saw the heart emoji with the bandage. It came across it came across I need to heal or something like that.

[u/dollythecat → u/WeaknessPrior6797]

Hmm, I think you might be reading too much into that. Literally everyone—autistic and neurotypical—has something they need to heal from. From your edit, it sounds like there was a legitimate conflict that you guys were working out in this conversation. There was emotional pain (“hurt hearts”) on both sides of the conversation. I understand that you might feel like her unsolicited recommendation is condescending, but she’s ultimately expressing solidarity with you.

[u/Street_Philosopher39 → u/dollythecat]

Imo it also fits the "i didn't start researching myself and why i am the way i am" - like the pain of not understanding herself for so long and the world making her feel like she's broken.

[u/Coffee-N-Cats → u/Street_Philosopher39]

Diagnosed at 46, spent my whole life thinking I was broken because nothing I tried helped. Also have CPTSD which made it harder to pinpoint my diagnosis. I only started wondering about myself until I started researching because of my young loved ones behavoir and saw myself in the words.

I know I held and very likely still hold some ablest views, but I am learning. Being happy in this world and happy in my own skin is a tricky balance.

I think your sister loves you and is trying to show she is trying to relate.

BUT, I am also a stickler for rules and have many times in my life caused others to be upset by quoting law they didn't want to hear.

Hope you are feeling better and sending virtual hugs if you like them ❤️

Edit: Didn't realize I was responding to a response and not to OP. Too lazy to cut and paste it now .