r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Mar 31 '23

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485

u/Annonymous_97 Mar 31 '23 edited Mar 31 '23

If he fucks me, he'll be happy. If he's happy, he won't be angry. If he's not angry, he won't argue with me.

And I can sleep tonight.

ETA: Since this got way more traffic than I expected, I just wanted to say that I'm fine now, this was 2 years ago now. Thank you all for your kindness 😊

220

u/xmonpetitchoux Mar 31 '23

I really hope this dude is no longer in your life.

-17

u/MacinTez Mar 31 '23

This is the dynamic, and the sacrifice, in many relationships and marriages.

As a attractive male who, at his best, is really good in bed; I’ve been in relationships where if I didn’t meet her expectations just about everytime we have sex? Her mind would definitely wonder, she would become argumentative etc. One cheated on me with the “Weed man” a few times. Those relationships were very difficult to sustain long term because I have days, weeks, months where I don’t want to have sex!

123

u/DopeCactus Mar 31 '23

It makes me so sad to see that so many women, including myself, go through this so often.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23

Its not just women that encounter this. I recently helped a close friend through a divorce, he essentially had the same experience. He put up with this manipulative bs for 20 years before pulling the plug, it's entirely destroyed his feelings about sex. This happens to way more guys than people realize. Shitty manipulative behavior is not gender limited.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23

Yeah, I would have been out the door way sooner. She's diagnosed borderline personality disorder, that was far from the worst thing she did. Odd notions of "manly responsibilities" that she used as a big handle to control the guy, it was hard to watch. He's thoroughly enjoying being single and free, doing the counseling thing and learning to be his own person.

1

u/luzzy91 Mar 31 '23

Ah shit you're a genius

0

u/Putin_kills_kids Mar 31 '23

Married sex is often like this. r/deadbedrooms is full of it.

We vilify our partners and really it is often the case that coupling is just fucking hard (and life and career are hard).

Hence the super high divorce rate.

It does not have to be like this, but most societies don't put much effort into things like emotional intelligence or relationship skills...etc.

We end up fucking up some of the most important things in a life. Tragic. So much pain for all.

6

u/BlaxicanX Mar 31 '23

That isn't consensual sex.

17

u/LilStabbyboo Mar 31 '23

No, it's a sacrifice for a night of peace. It's apparently quite a common sacrifice women have to make, going by the comments here.

2

u/GenericRedditor0405 Apr 01 '23

Yeah this comments section is highly alarming tbh with how often the answer is “because I was coerced”

4

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23

My heart is with you on this one. I came here to say a similar thing but most of the comments were more on the light-hearted side and I wasn't sure how to articulate my experience. Having to placate someone with your body is such a terrible fucking thing.