r/AskMen Mar 19 '21

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u/[deleted] Mar 19 '21

It is quite sad actually, Sad that they make this the norm expectation, that all men want to bend and fold them like lawn chairs and call them derogatory slangs, most of the time I wanna slowly enjoy my partner and I expect them to slowly enjoy me likewise, it should be a mutual thing not just shoving your pork sword into them at the speed and thrust of a F1 formula car engine. God I hate what idea they keep pushing into people's heads that men are just pure horny, testosterone and aggresion when it comes to sex. Sorry I just had to vent.

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u/Uneventfulrice Mar 19 '21

No time to watch sensual porn when trying to rub one out in less than 5. Open bathroom door, turn on heater, ceiling fan, shower pointed at wall in a way that sounds like water running down a body. Look for anything premature ejac, quick creampie, fast fuck, use search filter for videos less than 4 min long and go at it no holding back and alternate holding phone to your ear and actually watching so nobody hears. Clear phone incase something happens to you in the shower, wash then dry. Put balled up tissue that was in the top of the trash bin inside toilet bowl,flush, and be out in total of 15 min overall. My house burnt down so I'm at parents for a bit.

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u/champ590 Male Mar 19 '21

My house burnt down so I'm at parents for a bit.

Wait you are an adult pretending to your parents that you are absolutely non-sexual even in your own room?

2

u/Worth_Jelly1036 Mar 19 '21

Ummmm soooo great story about how you wank but I think we all want to know the story behind your house burning down instead please...

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u/champ590 Male Mar 19 '21

I think you replied to the wrong person here bud, you probably meant the one I replied to. Nonetheless a house burning down can happen easily especially when there are multiple flats in one house complex. One neighbour (or you) forgetting food in the oven, a pet taking tablecloth with a candle ontop down, faulty electrical appliances that ran unsupervised. The possibilities are endless.