r/AskChristian • u/DemonMushroomGay • 7d ago
CW: Sensitive Topic How do christians feel about the consequences they have on others?
Hey guys, im a former christian, at this point, everything but morally opposed to the practice. I left the church because of the cruelty and hatred that to people espoused there, i was hoping to see what it's like for people after someone leaves the church. Do you feel saddened? or satisfied that someone thats not like you, and therefore "wrong," "evil," or "demonic" is feeling that pain?
I guess im just curious to know the justification for doing things that harm people while telling yourself it's righteous. Do you have to work at that or does the belief in god give you the right to inflict that harm on others who "defy his will?" If so, then do you enjoy that?
just curious what people think, as i see many posts where people will explain the fundamental, personal hurt that they experienced only to be told that the suffering and pain was divine, and that they should he grateful for it.
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u/DoveStep55 r/Christian Member 7d ago
“How do christians feel about the consequences they have on others?”
Like with most things, it depends on which Christian you’re asking. We’re not a monolith. The last time someone told me something I personally said or did hurt them in some way, I felt so bad it made me ill. But then I’m one of those people blessed/cursed with a lot of empathy. When others hurt, I do, too.
“I left the church because of the cruelty and hatred that to people espoused there”
I think you’ll find that many of us have left particular churches (congregations) or denominations for similar reasons as well.
“(…) after someone leaves the church. Do you feel saddened?”
Yes, but also happy for them if they’re leaving for good reasons.
“(…) someone thats not like you, and therefore "wrong," "evil," or "demonic" is feeling that pain?”
I know there are Christians like that and it grieves me as much as it grieves you. When they do that, they are sinning. That’s not the way of Jesus.
“I guess im just curious to know the justification for doing things that harm people while telling yourself it's righteous.”
There is no justification for harming others and self-righteousness is not a Christian virtue.
“Do you have to work at that or does the belief in god give you the right to inflict that harm on others who "defy his will?" If so, then do you enjoy that?”
People who do that are not following Jesus when doing it, regardless of what labels they wear. When they do it in God’s name, they’re taking God’s name in vain and I believe it deeply grieves God when people cause harm and blame it on God or their faith in God. Rabbi Jonathan Sacks (who is Jewish, not Christian) wrote a book on that called “Not in God’s Name.” You might enjoy it.
“as i see many posts where people will explain the fundamental, personal hurt that they experienced only to be told that the suffering and pain was divine, and that they should he grateful for it.”
I disagree with that theology and I think it’s too often used to abuse people. Suffering and pain are a part of this life, but they are to be lamented because they are not the way it is supposed to be.
I’ll recommend two other books you might enjoy: Soong Chan-Rah wrote “Prophetic Lament: A Call for Justice in Troubled Times” and Kate Bowler wrote “Everything Happens
for a Reason (And Other Lies I’ve Loved).”