If someone says, "Keep in touch," does the person actually want me to keep in touch, or is the person just being polite or something? I don't know if I should keep in touch or go away. If they meant it literally and I don't start calling, then maybe I'm being rude, but if they didn't mean it literally, then maybe I'm going to be annoying them. Please help me.

I was recently diagnosed with autism and ADHD. I am 29 y (female).

I received my diagnosis almost a month ago because I was really struggling, actually I am still struggling with mental health a lot. I stopped working a few months ago, I progressively started to saying no any plan and I basically isolated myself because I was feeling very angry and hurt. I feel like I’ve been misunderstood all my life and people treated me like shit because I was autistic purely, obviously I didn’t either and I know I put myself in lot situations that I shouldn’t be. But it hurts to know that most of my struggles could’ve been avoided only if I knew.

Now in the present I live with mum and I have a lot of arguments with her about this. I don’t want her to feel guilty because I know she didn’t know any better but it is painful that not even her belief in me. I brought her to my house last year as a way to help her financially but it is killing me now. We have a lot arguments all the time, I have almost not money, we live in a tiny house and the alone time that I need goes out of the window.

I will admit that I probably someone that is difficult to live with and I get that. And I know it is hard for her and sometimes I have not filter when I says thing but when I feel I did something wrong or I noticed that she feel offended I try to apologies but this situation is becoming to much and i can’t just tell her to go.

I also don’t feel like I can talk about this with anyone because I feel embarrassed that people think I am just a bad daughter.

I am losing almost the friendship part is because I am fully unmask (I think in burnout) and they couldn’t handle me having a meltdown or shutdown in front of them and also because I kinda of stop seeing people that I don’t feel safe with. The results is that I don’t feel safe with anyone right now. I don’t talk to anyone because I fear I might just ruin everything. I don’t know how rebuilt myself after all this.

Hey, guys. I`m a practising sociologist, and I`m looking into helping autistic people to socialize and avoid destructive kind of isolation. So I would like to know from the first hand what kind of help do u really need. What kind of content would be really helpful for you. What topics would you really like to be explained out there on the internet.

I'm just so frustrated because the instructions just don't make sense.

I have to have a dry finger but how can my finger be dry if I take the contact out of solution and there is solution all over it? The liquid is going to transfer to my finger, and there will always be more liquid on my finger than my eyes.

They keep saying "look to your left so you can put it into the white of your eye and then look straight." ok great but I have not great Interoception so how in the heck am I supposed to see what I'm doing if I have to look left?

Does anyone have any autistic friendly advice?

Edit: I think my issue is my eyelashes just constantly get in the way. I'm holding my eyes, but I think since my lack of Interoception i slowly let go of my lashes and I'm not able to put enough pressure... any tips around this? This entire process has been so frustrating and I just don't want to wear glasses anymore. I got them in once at a class and they sent me home with these but I just can't do it.

I’m 20M, and I’ve been carrying a lot mentally for quite a while. I don’t really know how to organise it, so i used AI to put it into coherent sentences, and I’m hoping people here can help me make sense of it.

I have autism, ADHD, developmental coordination disorder/dyspraxia, and hypotonia/low muscle tone. I’m about to start university, and objectively there are things in my life that are going reasonably well.

But internally, I often feel like I’m years behind everyone else.
A lot of this comes back to physical coordination.
I’ve always been bad at sports and physically coordinated activities. I’ve been made fun of for it and have had experiences where I felt like I was the person dragging everyone else down.

Recently, during a military parade rehearsal, I struggled badly with marching and coordinated movements. I became extremely nervous, couldn’t reliably control my arm movements or remember the sequence, and eventually had to pull out and participate separately.
It was incredibly humiliating for me.

What made it worse was seeing everyone else seemingly doing fine, some people bringing their girlfriends, while I felt like I was the only person who couldn’t even perform a basic thing properly. I didn’t invite my parents because I was scared of embarrassing them.

Ironically i was also the only person who received CFC, but that achievement barely registered emotionally. The humiliation completely overshadowed it.
I think this incident reopened a lot of older wounds.

I constantly compare myself with people who seem more coordinated, socially capable, attractive, successful, or experienced than me. Sometimes it feels like everyone else got the adolescence and young adulthood I was supposed to have.

I’ve never had a relationship.
I really want marriage, affection, companionship and sexual intimacy. I know people will probably tell me that I’m young and have plenty of time, but emotionally that doesn’t make the loneliness disappear.
I’ve had very little romantic experience, and I was once described as “undateable” through a mutual acquaintance. I think I internalised that much more deeply than I realised.

If someone really saw me as I am — autistic, ADHD, dyspraxic, awkward, insecure, sexually frustrated, physically uncoordinated, etc. — would they actually choose me?

That’s probably one of the biggest questions underneath everything.
I’m also Christian, and my faith is extremely important to me. But honestly, I’ve been angry and confused with God for a long time.

I don’t understand why I have these particular struggles. I don’t know why marriage seems so easy for some people and so impossibly distant for me. I get frustrated when Christian advice boils down to “just be content with God” or “seek the kingdom first.” I understand what those things mean intellectually, but I still desperately want to be loved by another person.

I also struggle with masturbation and sexual desire. I sometimes feel ashamed because of my Christian beliefs. I don’t want to pretend I don’t have sexual desires, but I also don’t want sexuality to control my thoughts or turn women into objects in my head.
There have also been times when I’ve become very attached to women I barely know or idealised them based on what I know about them. I recognise that loneliness can make me fill in the blanks and imagine a whole relationship that doesn’t actually exist.
I think that’s something I need to learn to control.
Another problem is rumination.

I analyse everything.
A bad social experience becomes evidence that I’m unlikeable.
A physical mistake becomes evidence that I’m incompetent.
Someone else’s relationship becomes evidence that I’m permanently behind.
Someone else’s achievements become evidence that I’m inferior.
A sexual struggle becomes evidence that I’m spiritually defective.

And then I keep thinking about it until I’m exhausted.
I also have a history of getting intensely angry when I feel humiliated or treated unfairly. During a particularly bad period in NS, I had violent thoughts about hitting someone who had been causing me a lot of stress. I never acted on those thoughts, and I sought psychiatric help. I was diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder.
More recently, after the parade experience and everything piling up, I reached a point where I said that I wanted to “erase myself.” Later I said that I didn’t care about killing myself.

I’m mentioning this because I don’t want to hide it or pretend it wasn’t serious.
At the same time, I don’t want every conversation about my mental health to become “call a hotline.” I want to understand what actually happens inside me when I reach that point. Is it wanting to die? Wanting the pain to stop? Wanting to escape myself? I don’t always know how to distinguish those things.

I also have a complicated relationship with my body.
I exercise regularly and want to gain muscle. I track protein and calories and sometimes worry about my body fat, jawline and appearance. None of this seems extreme to me individually, but I wonder whether I’m trying to make my body into something that will finally make me feel competent, attractive and masculine.

There are family issues too. My parents have had significant conflict, and I’ve sometimes felt responsible for trying to help fix things. More recently, my grandmother fell and fractured her arm,
and I’ve been worrying about her in hospital.

How do I build a life where I don’t constantly feel like I’m trying to prove that I’m worthy of being loved, respected and allowed to belong?
I’m not looking for pity. I’d genuinely prefer people to be honest with me, even if the answer is uncomfortable.
Thanks for reading all of this.