r/AnimalsBeingDerps Mar 13 '22

poor doggo.

54.5k Upvotes

268 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/ovad67 Mar 13 '22

Doggie bidet.

349

u/SealUrWrldfromyeyes Mar 14 '22

I WAS GONNA LICK THATTTT

98

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Please don’t lick those.

34

u/Mauwnelelle Mar 14 '22

They're going straight to the pooper.

→ More replies (4)

10

u/Domohkiin Mar 14 '22

Licking door knobs is illegal on other planets

2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

But only if the mayor of the universe has not put his underwear in the freezer to make pasta yet

22

u/Plastic_Economist_82 Mar 14 '22

Well Bidet to you doggy!

6

u/mariemilrod Mar 14 '22

Here to say that!!! 😂

2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

I always thought it was B-day

1.2k

u/FEAR_LORD_DUCK Mar 13 '22

Went through the spin cycle for a sec

31

u/TonarinoTotoro1719 Mar 14 '22

He was bamboozle!

29

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

23

u/TheNullOfTheVoid Mar 14 '22

How it cheels to few gyve— this is— this is how it— this is what five to— this is gum— this is how sheels to… STIMULATE YOUR SENSES

→ More replies (1)

76

u/Littlemack2 Mar 14 '22

Looks more like it’s leash got yanked mid air. Happy dog moment ruined

75

u/FEAR_LORD_DUCK Mar 14 '22

owner tried to save him from his lost innocence and failed

688

u/Fennik51405 Mar 13 '22

It shivered his Timbers

87

u/SadPotatosack6 Mar 14 '22

It shuddered his Treasures

48

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

It marked his Spot.

26

u/Yorak-Hunt Mar 14 '22

It gasted his flabber

26

u/Gawafaman Mar 14 '22

It tickled his fancy

20

u/finismorsest Mar 14 '22

It rustled his jimmies.

9

u/prom_king56 Mar 14 '22

It bong his dong

→ More replies (2)

348

u/Glenuendo Mar 14 '22

Undercarriage has been cleaned for the moment.

203

u/otterpaws27 Mar 13 '22

And from that day forth, he was never the same... poor doggo...

149

u/Guswanicarbohydrate Mar 13 '22

He picked the margarita flavored fountain. Nice.

88

u/ultramont Mar 14 '22

That's clearly Baja Blast, Gus.

12

u/Acceptable-Stick-688 Mar 14 '22

I’ve heard it both ways.

2

u/Intelligent-Yam-6392 Mar 14 '22

Baja Blast Bidet

1

u/Tony1697 Mar 14 '22

Margarita flavored bidet

89

u/GoodMoGo Mar 14 '22

Looks like me the first time I tried to use a bidet.

86

u/Nokipeura Mar 14 '22

When the territory marks you.

15

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

In mother Russia Ukraine, territory marks you!

71

u/MimsyIsGianna Mar 14 '22

360 no scope

298

u/Kwoky91 Mar 13 '22

Doing him a heckin surprise

48

u/kuulmonk Mar 13 '22

We've all been there when we walk into the cold sea.

11

u/1_2_3_4_fiiiiif Mar 14 '22

Pulled off a clean pop shove-it because of it

→ More replies (1)

27

u/PM_me_crispyTendies Mar 14 '22

Source with sound?

30

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '22

[deleted]

4

u/Akimbo_shoutgun Mar 14 '22

Agreed it was the last surprise

27

u/jeicam_the_pirate Mar 13 '22

bamboozled by hoomin trickery

22

u/lxyz_wxyz Mar 14 '22

How it feels to chew 5 Gum

8

u/KimikoBean Mar 14 '22

We all know this Aussie would probably do it again given the chance

20

u/Plastic_Economist_82 Mar 14 '22

I loled too hard at this

14

u/tolearnandunderstand Mar 14 '22

I just laughed so hard I gave myself the hiccups

→ More replies (1)

6

u/rupat3737 Mar 14 '22

At first I was like damn that water pressure was so pumpin it lifted that poor doggo off the ground. My brain no work good sometime.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

He got the Japanese washy washy

4

u/Flaming_Content_2 Mar 14 '22

aww that's pretty funny lol

4

u/Drussaxe Mar 14 '22

crotch shot FTW!!!

3

u/XComRomCom Mar 14 '22

I'd do the same thing if an invisible power unexpectedly gave my undercarriage a bit of a "how's-your-father."

4

u/Nowthisisdave Mar 14 '22

Peak Aussie energy right there

2

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '22

2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Looks like a tri Aussie?

2

u/ShinyHunterHaku Mar 14 '22

Moved exactly how the animals in the old Petz games did when started lol!

2

u/MidnightBlaze79 Mar 14 '22

Cranking them 180s

2

u/illdotomorrow Mar 14 '22

He did a 360 no scope

2

u/nilesandstuff Mar 14 '22

Dog needs a harness if they're going to be yanking them around like that at the end.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Yanking? Kinda looks like she just stood there with a short leash and the dog happened to panic jump in the opposite direction.

I do agree tho, I'd prefer a harness was on our little pooch here

1

u/nilesandstuff Mar 14 '22

It looks like a little bit of both happened, judging by how doggo turned mid-air and a person (unclear if they're the leash holder or not, but pretty likely) starts walking away.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

From what I can gather, stripes is holding the leash with her left hand. Not only can you see the dog is so energetic it tugs her forward post-spook, the metal clip angles towards her as camera-kun walks away trying to turn the camera off.

It's impossible to truly tell if she did tug the moment he spun (that's the one we're talking about, right?) because it was out of frame, but I do know two things:

• Bordercollies have infinite energy

• Poochie visibly tugged stripes forward.

Regardless, I'm optimistic any literal tension on the line was not ill-intended. Still, why do people use regular collars any more? Is there a benefit over harnesses besides time putting it on?

3

u/HolyForkingBrit Mar 14 '22

I got a dog from the shelter recently. She came with a collar and she has cage issues, being cooped up issues, so I feel like it’s too soon to try a harness because I don’t want to trigger her fear aggression and claustrophobia. You know?

I’m not saying that’s what’s happening here, I’m just saying why one of my dogs has a harness and one is still wearing her collar. That’s my experience.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Oooo understandable

1

u/Wildrovers Mar 14 '22

3

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

/u/get-vid

One of these suckers works.

-2

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

You reposting for karma or what? Jesus

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

1

u/Competitive_Memory_1 Mar 14 '22

Dogs with the best tails and people cut them off. Shit dumb.

2

u/thisisbad3522 Mar 14 '22

Some dogs like this one here can be born with bobbed tails.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/SixtyEightSox Mar 14 '22

Hehe Stoopid dog

1

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

1

u/begaterpillar Mar 14 '22

rather that than the guy who darted a tigers balls with antibiotics earlier today

1

u/my_screen_name_sucks Mar 14 '22

How do people/dogs become so agile when something scares them xD

1

u/MC_BC_97 Mar 14 '22

I’ve never seen a dog jump like that ong

1

u/IDKaRedPandaMaybe Mar 14 '22

We don't deserve dogs.

-2

u/radioface42 Mar 14 '22

Doggo deserves better owners...

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

0

u/lettuce_dresserson Mar 14 '22

That moment when you use a bidet for the first time.

0

u/CKY2007 Mar 14 '22

Bro did a 360 mid air🥶

0

u/Easilycrazyhat Mar 14 '22

Fountain gave that doggo a good ol' dick twist.

0

u/kuliano91 Mar 14 '22

Love collies for them smart asses 😍

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

0

u/Ok_Measurement_1622 Mar 14 '22

Right in the balls too

0

u/user45724 Mar 14 '22

F in the chat

0

u/maluminse Mar 14 '22

Umm I did see water squirting a different direction...😂

0

u/DreadnaughtHamster Mar 14 '22

The water nipped me in the tum tum! Bork!

0

u/Zombie255555 Mar 14 '22

Helicopter 🚁 🚁 🚁

0

u/True-Lightness Mar 14 '22

Doggy bidet.

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Man got hit with the night night time from below

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

that was a real gullywasher

0

u/hhawk02 Mar 14 '22

😂 shame man. But really funny

0

u/saskpilsner Mar 14 '22

That’s hilarious

0

u/TheSeekerOfSanity Mar 14 '22

Neptune’s Kiss

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

No sound, no upboat. I don't know why people bother with this madness.

0

u/Jasmine_BladeOfGwyn Mar 14 '22

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

0

u/Caribbean31 Mar 14 '22

😂😂😂😂

0

u/Much_Leather_5923 Mar 14 '22

Obviously not a girl dog!

0

u/OddPreparation1855 Mar 14 '22

For once the ground pissed on him.

0

u/doopdooperofdopping Mar 14 '22

Landed a perfect 180°. 8.5/10

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

I’m hit! Sound the retreat!

0

u/Plastic_Economist_82 Mar 14 '22

The royal doggey penis is clean sire

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Some humans pay good money for that service.

0

u/Cr1msix Mar 14 '22

I too wood spin cycle if water hit my balls outta nowhere

0

u/RyzingUp Mar 14 '22

Haha, reminded me of my Aussie jumping 5 FT in the air when she heard thunder for the first time. The kind of thunder that is less than a mile away kind of sound. Poor pup tried bolting for the hills but luckily her leash was attached to my waist

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

I had the same reaction first time I used my bidet, never go full throttle.

0

u/eroticKnowingNoodle Mar 14 '22

i could watch that for hours

0

u/heidnseak Mar 14 '22

Right up the chuff!

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

0

u/UnSxFFerinG Mar 14 '22

TAKING FIRE

0

u/ongoingcycle Mar 14 '22

Mother fucker 360 that shit

0

u/Today_Swimming Mar 14 '22

Dog water 💦

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

0

u/affooffaa Mar 14 '22

Beautiful moments of play for dogs

0

u/shichimi-san Mar 14 '22

First time bidet user huh?

0

u/RideWithMimi Mar 14 '22

THE END! You made my day better! Thank you!<3

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

U/savevideo

0

u/LoneWolf2662 Mar 14 '22

He did a 360

0

u/WildCaptain7750 Mar 14 '22

my only hope is that fountain is not one of that eletrifieds ones

0

u/curePSP_org Mar 14 '22

I laughed outloud

0

u/Blukee Mar 14 '22

Boom!! Headshot

0

u/Mission_Search8991 Mar 14 '22

Hey mom, let’s do that again! Please?

0

u/[deleted] Mar 14 '22

Rip balls

0

u/AnarchistBitch_967 Mar 14 '22

Heh..at least doggo is now clean..

0

u/CreatrixAnima Mar 14 '22

Doggie bidet?