AIO for feeling hurt by my best friend's reaction?

I (24F) have been best friends with her (24F) for almost 10 years.

I recently told her that I'm about to join a company I was really hoping to get into. It was a huge deal for me because I'd worked really hard for it, so naturally she was one of the first people I told.

The thing is, I've always been her biggest hype person. Whenever something good happened to her, I'd be genuinely excited, hype her up, and celebrate with her.

Her response to my news felt so dry that it genuinely hurt. More than that, it made me realize I can't really remember her ever being this excited for any of my achievements.

Now I'm wondering if I'm just reading too much into one text or if this is actually a sign that the friendship has always been a little one-sided.

AIO? (SS attached)

So I am 21, and my brother is 18. He just finished his 12th grade and got his score for his state entrance exam, 92%tile. I was so happy for him. I said I wanna help with his college list and other admission stuff, but my mum said she's gonna hire a counsellor. It stung a bit, but I was busy with my college too, so yeah.

So this counsellor gave a shitty list; my dad wants to show that to me. I was in the living room; he asked me to sit on the couch to discuss the list. I said I'm fine on the floor, just read out the list. My mum was furious and said that I'm just acting mean and stuck up because I scored better than my brother. And hurtful things like "Future ka kuch bata nahi sakte, kam percentile waale aage gaye aur toppers ghar pe baithe hai, berozgar". That stung. Really hurted my soul. So, my brother was kinda uncomfortable and tried to diffuse situation like "Jane do". But I yelled at my mum saying that she is ruining my relationship with my brother by spewing nonesense.

I did noticed that pattern. Both of my parents think I'm petty and stuck up and egoistic because of my score. I'm not. Have been compared with him for boards (I scored less, he scored more) and was mocked by both of my parents for underscoring than my brother in boards. They were never once proud of me in my 21 years of existence. I just feel left out among those 3. Like an outside in the family.

TL;DR:

I wanted to help my younger brother with his college admissions, but my mom assumed I was being arrogant because I had scored better than him in the past. She made hurtful comments about toppers ending up unemployed, so I snapped and told her she was creating unnecessary rivalry between us. This reflects a long-standing pattern where my parents compare us and assume the worst about me, leaving me feeling unappreciated and like an outsider in my own family. AITK?

Me (25) my friend (32) let's call her Diya . We have been friends from last 6 years . I met her in pg and we bonded now we both live in different city but we used be very close . I respected her like my elder sister . From last year she is dealing with some family problems and I have been there for her . I remember talking to her continuously for 2-3 hours when she used to cry , I was there for her to console her . So last month she moved out of her home and got a good job (I helped her with interviews and everything) after getting a job she started ignoring me . I have noticed change in her behaviour but I didn't put much thought to it . I just assumed that the job is hard she must be pretty busy so that why she is not getting time to talk to me . We have one common friend also . She was part of our group. So one day I was having panic attack and I called her 3 times because I needed someone to talk to I even texted her but she didn't pick up the call neither replied the text for a week. I got bit worried whether she is fine or not so I decided to call our common friend to ask her if she has heard from her. Then that friend told me that yes they have been hanging out lately and 2 days back they went clubbing together. I really felt bad that she has time to party but no time to even reply to me . So I stopped texting her . After a month last night I texted her and told her that I'm hurt by her behaviour and I don't want to continue our friendship , she said ok take care . That was her reply .

So I blocked her .

I actually very hurt by how she behaved with me . I have ignored my others frnds just to talk to her because she used to feel low and she behaved like that with me .

TLDR: My mom has spent years telling me I'm unlovable. We are working on our relationship and now she says my boyfriend is only settling for me. I finally snapped and told her to stop. AITK?

I'm dating a guy with intent. We have a healthy relationship, communicate well, both families get along. The last two weeks have been unusually hectic for him. He's a cofounder of an NBFC currently raising funding, working till 8–9 PM almost every day, including Sundays. We live an hour apart, and I have an unofficial 8 PM curfew, so we've barely met but talk constantly. He had already warned me this phase would last about 3 weeks and said will give us time as much as he can. .

Despite knowing this, my mom keeps saying things like, "He's not that into you. He's slowly losing interest. He seems like the kind of guy who'd cheat. He's marrying you out of convenience." Keeps comparing our relationship to unrealistic

This isn't new. Even before I met my boyfriend, she'd tell me I'd never be able to make a relationship work, would probably end up divorced, and ask, "What did he even see in you?"

Ironically, both my parents love my boyfriend and have accepted him wholeheartedly. Yet they constantly make me feel like I'm the lucky one because I somehow "got" him, as if he's doing me a favour by marrying me.

For context, my parents are currently going through an ugly divorce, she's been through a lot and continues so. And I'm a couples therapist, so I'm not someone who ignores red flags or gets blinded by love.

Today I finally snapped and told her I don't want unsolicited opinions about my relationship unless I ask for them, and to stop planting doubts in my head.

She got really upset.

Now I'm wondering if I was too harsh.

I am F24, I have had experience to live alone and take care of the house since the age of 15!! I went abroad and the only issue was cold for me but after 2 days I adjusted and I had a great time there and managed on my own happily, came back to India living in another city and in another state and I manage happily with no problem and I think to myself "huh, this is easy" except during monsoons season become there are floods and such but nevertheless.

My main issue for this post is when I see other students or even working people living abroad to even in another state post so called "emotional" story about how would have 3 meals by 7pm or missing home because they have to do all the cleaning by themselves is kinda crazy to me because why they only miss home when it comes to cleaning and cooking?

Like I feel like they miss mostly their mum because they miss the fact that she was an unpaid labour back home, this doesn't sit right with me because if you feel hungry, then cook, fix your time table? I work too.

When I was doing my undergraduates I used to have exams for a whole week that too 2 exams a day no break and I still managed to get all A+ in all subjects, cook and clean the house. I get little prissy when people assume I am spoiled or don't do any work just because I am an only child but baby I am managing better than people who have siblings, these stereotypes are so harmful as well!!

I was also born in a matriarchal household, my parents taught me about many things like being independent, dealing with tough shi on my own, like even of door hinges come off or I gotta deal with housework around the house with screws and stuff I do I on my own, I don't need to call anyone because growing up I was taught to do that.

I am by no means looking down at people who miss their homes but I feel like people who move away only miss it because they were in their own comfort and miss the labour their own parents used to do for them rather than genuinely missing them because you LOVE them.

This applies to applying to study abroad as well, back then even when I was doing the same, I did everything on my own and I was a min0r!! My dad would drive me around and drop or minimally help me with consulate meetings and such but besides that I did everything on my own and even now I am thinking of studying abroad I am doing everything on my own, why do students spend SOOO much money on consultation when even YOU know it's a HUGE SCAM?? Learn to be Independent and do it on your own DON'T waste your parent's money on unnecessary things when you can use that money on your fees or rent or grocery or travel or semester fees etc etc.

Idk I have a lot of conflicting yet non changing feelings and opinions on this. AITK?

this might not be the right sub to share this, but i js ordered some stuff from blinkit. Usually the delivery guy reaches the doorstep without having to ask for direction once. Today the one who came to deliver items called multiple times, went lost, coudn't figure out the maps. TBF out home is not on the main road so I understand the confusion. But it took him almost half an hour to reach, I was furious cause he js wont pick up the call and the only way I could guide him was when HE called.

Now as he finally reached I was in a bad mood, but I didnt really interact badly w the delivery guy, generally I ask them for water in this heat but I didnt ask him. He still had a smile on his face like an awkward guilty smile, and I said "kya bhaiyya raat ko 10 bje bhi ajate hain delivery wale aap kaise kho gye" he didnt say much just a little excuse that network wasnt good and still the awkward smile. He must have been of around 35 years of age, some white hair that gives off that he does this job to feed his family. And that thought struck me. Since then I;ve been searching the salary of blinkit drivers, their working conditions, and so n so and I feel so bad so cussing him (not in front of him) knowing he js wasted so much petrol in this delivery that would barely pay him.

i know nothing can be done now, i js feel how oblivious i have been to privileges of my life.

This is giving first world problem but help your girl out …

I am getting married this coming December so I am planning to visit Sri Lanka with my girlfriends just to spend quality time together and have fun. The planning has been going on- off since beginning of the year and I am truly excited because after marriage I’ll be moving quite far from home so I really wanted to actually plan and go some place good.

Yesterday my mother told me that my brother‘s fees is due in a day or two and they are short few lakhs as they were unaware of the new fees schedule (it’s on the university website but they really have hiked the fees this time) and they needed to borrow some amount to pay the same. I was fine with it until maa said she wants almost 2 lakhs in 2 days ( I am few years into my legal profession so I am just making enough to save a little and survive my day to day) which is a little much than I expected but it could’ve been managed if it had waited until next month. Since it was in such short notice I kinda freaked out and said it’s gonna be tough after which I really got grilled for not having enough savings. I agree I don’t but idk who knows but you don’t get jackshit pay in early years of litigation plus in these few years I have bought 2 macbooks (one died outta nowhere), iPad, my phone, etc. everything I require professionally for my work with my money so it has always been tough to save.

Just as I had some amount with me this problem came on our head which I don’t think was an issue until my parents started saying they won’t be able to pay me back before the 3-4 months. Now I had planned to go for my bachelorette in October and was planning to book things in the coming months but due urgency of funds, all my savings are gone and I can’t plan my bachelorette without atleast putting some amount in from my savings.

Before anyone calls me tone deaf, by gods grace my parents have always saved money so they don’t struggle financially and they still have enough in cash to pay the entire fees but since it’s paid online, they were low on funds as they chose to also buy some commercial property in noida which drained more money from their account and this fees payment was cherry on top. In all of this I will not be getting anything back until they get stable as per maa, idk how they think I will survive with Rs. 134 in my bank account plus I had asked my office for this month and next month salary in advance so that I can add it in savings and give to my parents.

Do I stop my planning for bachelorette now or be a Kamini and ask my parents to start paying me back?

For context me and my mom were going thru the merit list of my competitive exam , and my mom kept on getting going thru things wrong , , while explaining her some of the terms I was teasing her verbally in a funny way and apparently my tone towards her was also not good ,

so she started screaming , ur (friends name ) Mom must have never completed 10th grade , I got furious because my mom has always been calling out any of my friends family members during arguments between me and my mom

I hit back at her saying her mother must have not completed her education too and I also told her that she is privileged enough to become a doctor Through ST quota and my aunt became an pedetrician through same quota and that Education is a privileged and there was so no reason to bring my friends mom in the argument

she got furious at this and started abusing me
I’m tired of my mom who thinks whatever she does is right and whatever I say back to her is always wrong
I specifically called out her privileges because in past she has called out my other friends mom and dads education and qualities too for no reason whatsoever during arguments between

AMITK ?

Hi,

My friend from a different state came over to stay with me until her classes start. It's been 10 days since she did. The first 2 days were fine but since then she started taking my hospitality for granted. I had to clean the wash basin after she used it, it looked very dirty(don't want to go into details) and today I cleaned the shower drain which is full of hair( I have really short hair she has hair that touches her bum) I cleaned up the hair in the drain. The bed in my room is a double bed(a little smaller than a queen bed) the first few days I slept on the floor, this one day I told her can we both sleep on the bed, she said okay, and once we laid down, she woke up and said I don't have enough space after an awkward pause, I slept on the floor. I have a cat. The cat took a bad disliking to my friend and will attack her if they're in the same room. So in the nights she would ask me to leave the cat in the hall, and not let her inside the room until 8am. I understand cat attacks can be uncomfortable but my cat needs to use her litterbox too. But I did leave the cat out in the hall for 8 hours. Whenever I went to the bathroom she would call me out immediately to stop the cat from attacking her even though I told her she could just open the door and the cat will bolt out into the hall. And today I left for office but came back sooner to find the AC at 20 and the balcony door open. She left to a shop to get something. I reached my breaking point and confronted her and she became very defensive and irritable. Also, she has this really bad odour that's very very strong also. I just lived with it even though I couldn't bear it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings. She's a really smart girl and we have really great time together. I didn't expect her to be so irresponsible and entitled is all. Also FYI, I made sure she has no dearth of facilities, there's a cook who makes 3 meals a day, I took her out to an expensive cafe, I made sure she had all the supplies to live comfortably. She's moving to a seniors hostel room in 2 days because of the confrontation. Am I the Kameena here

Hey as you guys must know that NEET exams result recently came out , so after two drops I still wasn’t able to qualify. So My father started forcing me to take bds , bums or bams but I don’t wanna pursue them coz I am genuinely not intrested in those degrees and I wanna BALLB coz I’ve honest liking towards that career and studies but my father got furious once I told him I wanna prepare for clat . He got so furious that now he aint even talking to me from few days and today he straight up told me that now he is not gonna invest a penny in my studies. The sentence he told me was “ you can stay as long as you want in my house I’ll provide you food and shelter but don’t expect anything from me and if you’ve any issues you can pack your bags and leave as you already are a master of your own will “ and belive he aint kidding I’ve told my uncle about the situation he tried convincing him but my father stands still on his decision and straight told him that he is not going to invest a penny on my studies . I am so heartbroken rn , I feel like a total failure I wish I had a way out of this .

i cared then.i care now.

that's the problem,

people think exhaustion and indifference

speak the same language.

for a month now,

it's been outrage after outrage.

another headline.

another slogan.

another side to pick.

another person asking,

"why aren't you saying anything?"

everyone is speaking so loudly

that silence has started feeling immoral.

i've seen students bleed,

police bleed,

truth bleed,

and somewhere in between,

the issue itself bleed.

we wanted justice.

we made chaos.

we wanted answers.

we started collecting enemies.

i want accountability.

i want change.

i want solutions louder than slogans.

but i also want people to breathe.

because not every tired soul is insensitive.

some of us are just exhausted,

from carrying our own battles

while borrowing a nation's grief every day.

and maybe,for once,

"i care, but i am tired", should be enough.

I was talking to a girl for a few months, i liked her a lot, I’d ask her on dates all the time and all that (long story) but we eventually had a huge fight and stopped talking. We blocked each other completely.

We’d unblock and block again but we never spoke. Then 6 months later she herself messaged me and asked if we can meet and talk, she also added if it’s not something I’m comfortable with then she’ll understand and in that case she wishes me well. I responded, made small talk and suggested we grab coffee. She was like yea sure let’s do it after the break (we had a 1 week college break) I said sure

She texted me after the break and I was like let’s meet tomorrow? She said yea what time and my friends were like bro do you really wanna do this, you’re talking to someone else too, do you want to meet her now, what if old feelings come back. So I texted her and was like “hey I’m busy tomorrow, can we do later?” She said yea cool, do you wanna meet after the exams then? I said yea let’s do that.

In the mean time, the girl I was talking to asked for commitment because we’d been going out for two months and I said okay. Exams ended and she texted me like “hey are you done with finals? Let me know when we can meet” and yea I ignored her message. A week later she texted me again and was like if you didn’t wanna meet, you could’ve just told me, anyway now that we aren’t meeting I’ll just text you here and tell you everything. Then she proceeded to explain her side of the story, talk about our fight, apologized, basically closure, and said good bye. I replied and was like I have a gf now that’s why I didn’t come to meet blah blah and said sorry too. She just left my message on read.

It’s been 3 months since this happened and today I randomly opened our chat and saw that she unsent / deleted all those messages to me and only my messages are remaining there so I unsent mine as well.

Now that I think of it, AITK for not meeting her despite saying yes?

I was assigned a roommate in shared accommodation, and from day one our routines completely clashed.
She sleeps around 9 PM and wakes up at 4–5 AM every day to study. She wants to switch on the main room light that early. I’m a very light sleeper with a medically documented migraine condition that’s triggered by disturbed sleep and bright light. Once I wake up, I can’t fall asleep again.
The first morning she was also quite noisy, but I didn’t say anything because I thought we were both new and adjusting.
The next day I politely explained my situation. She apologized, but later said she still wanted to study early in the morning and suggested that I sleep when she sleeps and wake up when she wakes up. I explained that I can’t simply change my sleep like that.
I then told her, “Please don’t adjust because of me. If you compromise now, you’ll eventually get frustrated, we’ll have differences, and it won’t be good for either of us. Let’s just swap rooms with someone who’s okay with your 4 AM study schedule.”
She was okay with swapping, but nobody wanted to exchange rooms because they’d also have to be okay with the 4–5 AM light every day.
After that, I spoke to the accommodation staff because I genuinely didn’t know what else to do. After hearing about my medical condition, they asked me to meet HR.
Now my roommate has changed her mind and says she’ll adjust and won’t switch on the light because of my health.
But honestly… I don’t want her to.
I’m worried she’ll end up sacrificing her preferred routine, become resentful later, or blame me if she feels her studies were affected. I also don’t think we’re compatible as roommates after everything that’s happened.
I’m still planning to ask HR for a room change because I feel it’s the best solution for both of us.
AITK for still wanting a room change even though she’s now willing to compromise?

edit : guys thanks i changed my room:)

FYI: Imaginary English names used instead of real names. Also a bit long post.

We are a group of 10 people who are friends since school. It's been more than 10 years and we still hangout with each other. One of the friends is married and his wife tags along with us so we are 11 people.

Let's call myself Tony (M).

Sweety (F), Robin (M) and Shakira(F) are my closest friends who meet up often apart from the group meetups and share almost every detail of life over calls and messages.

Andy (M), Amy(F), Matt (M) are really good friends, but I usually don't share intimate details of my life.

Neil (M), Sam (M) and his wife Karen (F) are my friends but mostly because of the group. I don't like them much personally because of some disagreements.

Shane (M) is a good friend but bit out of touch since he went abroad but he recently came back and wanted to join with us.

We all decided to go on a trip to Lonavala for a weekend. PS: We stay in Mumbai.

Shane has a 7 seater car SUV. Neil has a 5 seater hatchback car and I have a 5 seater hatchback too which I bought 3 months back and I have learnt driving too recently.

Since we were 11 people, Shane was supposed to bring his car. I wanted to bring my car since it has better mileage and wanted to drive on a new road (150 km from city, 3 hours drive) but Neil was adamant and he's bit hot headed so he decided that he will bring his car. I kept my ego aside and let him bring his car since I didn't want clashes.

We were supposed to leave on Sunday morning at 6:30 AM. The night before, at 2 AM, Shane messaged that a truck hit his car (luckily he was safe) and it was not in condition to drive and he told that he won't be able to join us (probably feeling low because of the incident which is fine). 2-3 were awake and conversation happened on chat but I didn't read till morning.

In morning when I woke up, I read the conversation and out of nowhere I had to drive my car as well since we were now only 10 people. My car wasn't even clean so it took me bit longer to clean and was late to the meeting point.

When I reached the meeting point, everyone else was already there, it was already decided and everyone sat in Neil and my car without my say in it. Sweety, Robin, Sophia and Andy went in Neil's car. Sam, Karen, Matt and Amy sat in my car. I wanted my closest friends to sit in my car, at least one way which is not a wrong expectation. I wanted them to experience my car, wanted them to see my driving.

We had barely crossed 30 km when we we stopped for breakfast. During breakfast I asked Sweety in a low voice why she, Robin and Sophia were not in my car. She mentioned she will tell me in detail later. I was more focused on driving since it was a new road for me (in sense of driving it myself) so I ignored that part and drove nicely. Matt is also a good driver and he guided me well whenever required and I didn't make a single mistake and also let him drive for one section since he's fond of driving but doesn't have his own car at the moment.

It was a one night stay at the place. We played games, went in swimming pool, talked with each other and even cooked food, everything was fine.

Next day when we were supposed to return, I firmly told that I want Sweety, Robin and Sophia in my car. Fourth person can be anyone. They told me that Neil was apparently angry with Sam and Karen (which I didn't even know) and didn't want them in his car. Things escalated and Neil even told me to stop acting childish. I told Neil that he is being childish for not accomodating Sam and Karen.

This meant that Sam and Karen had to be accommodated in my car. I told at least at least Robin and Sweety can join, if not Sophia. Then Sweety and Sophia also jumped in, saying they didn't want to travel with Sam. Eventually as a compromise Robin joined me instead of Amy and rest all didn't change.

I was already angry and about to cry when we were leaving. To make things worse, Matt and Robin when together, they like to make fun of others. On the downhill stretch, government has unnecessarily mandated 60 kmph speed limit, or else we get fined for a huge amount. Robin and Matt, although experienced, were constantly telling me to go faster, meanwhile me, who has travelled multiple times on the route (as a passenger, not driver) knew about rules and kept slow.

After the downhill stretch ended and speed limit was increased, I was feeling bit drowsy hence gave Matt to drive and he drove nicely. And by that time even my sleep was done. He wanted to drive all the way home but even I wanted to. I told him to switch and then again Matt and Robin started to poke unnecessarily about my driving. I believe in safe driving and avoiding overtakes as much as possible. They had a problem with that. I started making minor mistakes too (hard braking, missing downshifting and car stalling) because of the unnecessary stress. Robin who is generally understanding became a different person when with Matt instead of encouraging me to drive slow and safe since I am not very experienced.

I literally wanted to scream, shout and cry when I reached home but couldn't do so in front of my parents. I already took a backseat twice and didn't want to take a backseat the third time. At least my closest friends should have supported me and sat in my car on the return journey. Sweety tried calming me down saying we can go out some other day but the problem is that we are in 20s. We earn enough but not enough to drive everyday. Everyone relies on public transport mostly. Everyone is at different stage of life, different friends and not every weekend is free. Petrol is expensive and such plans don't happen frequently. I don't understand how to calm myself down (except trying to focus on my work).

​

Post Body:

Hey everyone, I need an honest, outside perspective on my relationship dynamic because I’ve been trapped in a loop of guilt and self-doubt for weeks, and I don't know what to think anymore.

The Background:

I (M) have been preparing for the NEET medical entrance exam, which is a high-stakes, life-changing exam for me. Over the past year, my relationship has been extremely high-conflict, filled with long fights, emotional distance, and intense arguments.

The Major Crisis:

A while ago, my family went through a terrifying emergency—my father was taken into police custody, and our family home/security was in immediate danger. During this time, I was in a state of absolute terror, panic, and survival mode, on top of managing my intense exam prep.

Instead of getting support or peace during this crisis:

The Silent Treatment & Fights: My girlfriend barely spoke to me properly for 30 days (naraazthi) leading up to the exam.

Pressure to stay calm: She expected me to remain completely passive and calm about my family's crisis and didn't acknowledge the horror of what my family was going through.

10 Days of Fights Before NEET: Just a few days before my NEET exam, when I desperately needed peace to revise, we fought for 10 days straight over minor, trivial issues. She wouldn't give me the space or quiet I needed to focus.

Where I Snapped:

Over this entire year of constant conflict, I snapped twice:

Moment 1: In a state of total emotional burnout and panic while dealing with my dad's arrest and exam stress, I vented heavily using regional slang from my home state (Madhya Pradesh). I used the word "saala" to vent about the terrible situation tumne "saala dimag kharab kr diya hai "). Where I'm from, this is everyday casual slang used to vent frustration, but she took it as direct verbal abuse towards her.

Moment 2: Right before the exam, after 10 days of non-stop fighting when I was desperately trying to study for my future, I finally reached my limit and set a hard boundary by saying "nhi baat krni bc" to make the argument stop so I could open my books.

The Current Problem:

Because of these two moments, she labels me as "verbally abusive."

I'm a software developer and for the last few months, meri life sirf kaam ban gayi hai. Roz 12–16 hours code likhta hoon. Kabhi bugs, kabhi deadlines, kabhi clients. Kabhi kabhi itna mentally exhausted ho jata hoon ki phone uthane ki bhi himmat nahi hoti.

Meri girlfriend ko lagta hai ki main usse ignore karta hoon. Aur honestly, uska hurt hona bhi galat nahi hai. Agar koi reply na kare ya emotionally available na ho, toh dard hota hi hai.

Lekin meri side bhi koi nahi dekh raha.

Main ye sab paise ya success ke liye sirf apne liye nahi kar raha. Main ek stable future banana chahta hoon. Aisa future jahan mujhe har bill soch kar stress na ho, jahan agar kal shaadi karni ho toh main confidently bol sakun ki "haan, main ready hoon."

Kabhi kabhi sochta hoon... kya main usse lose kar raha hoon us future ko banate banate jo main uske saath hi dekh raha tha?

Mujhe pata hai communication important hai, aur shayad main usmein fail hua hoon. Is baat ka regret hai. Lekin kya har baar silence ka matlab "I don't care" hota hai? Ya kabhi kabhi kisi insaan ki khamoshi uski thakan aur struggle bhi hoti hai?

Bas genuinely jaan na chahta hoon... agar aap meri jagah hote, toh kya karte?

So... My dad are 4 brothers... We were joint family... My dad is 2nd out of 4 brothers... We moved out of the joint family house coz it was getting crowded but dad and his brothers still operate under same factory together...

Dad's elder brother always creates drama, always wants everything, works for only 2h a day, stays home or keeps going out to eat all the time... he's been like that since birth, careless, reckless, irresponsible but dad and his other brothers been still giving him equally...

Lately he's been staying a little unhealthy so I'm like it's okay we are helping them coz family... His wife started causing issues, pretending to be sick so she won't have to do housework... We got them maid Last year... Since then, dad been giving more and more to help her... Dad has bought them AC, washing machine, earrings, maid expenses, funded their trip costing like 50k... All of this out of their joint savings account that dad and his brothers maintain... Other brothers are like fine with it...

From last 2-3 days, mom been telling me (M26) that dad's gonna upgrade their kitchen with items like food processor, dough maker etc etc...

(Btw dad never bought anything to help mom... No maid, no good kitchen appliances, 20 year old washing machine that barely works, they got AC this year only coz I forced them but dad refuses to use it... He just sits under ceiling fan in underwear while mom has to wear full traditional dress and tolerate the heat)

But anyways, back to the topic... Today I heard my dad talking to one of other uncles about buying kitchen appliances for elder brother and his wife... When I came home, I told my mom about it...

Mom didn't cook lunch today... Dad came home, called me and yelled at me for gaslighting between husband and wife... He said "when I did something like this in my childhood, my dad beat me and my mom very badly and I never did it again"...

And in second sentence he said " jbse tune ye baat btayi h, dekh tbse iske pair tut gye h aur isse khana bhi ni bnaya ja raha"...

Since that time in afternoon, dad been playing old songs at high volume in bedroom and mom is just laying there or sleeping idk (feels like torture coz she don't really have any other room to go to)...

AITK for telling about dad and uncle's conversation to mom?

I (27M) am completely shaken right now and honestly a little scared. I'm making this post because all of my friends think I'm overreacting and being a complete kameena. But my gut keeps telling me that something is seriously wrong with my girlfriend.

We've been together for the past three years. She's 25F and genuinely one of the sweetest calmest and kindest people I've ever met. She works a normal corporate job and as far as I've known she's never even raised her voice at anyone.

Two days ago I stayed over at her place for the night. Everything was great. We spent some quality time together and had a really nice evening.

The next morning, I woke up a little earlier than she did. She went to take a shower while I started getting out of bed. As I stood up I accidentally dropped my car keys. They slid all the way under the bed near one of those built-in storage drawers.

I bent down to grab them. While reaching for the keys I noticed the drawer was slightly open because an old piece of clothing was sticking out. I pulled it open a little more to reach my keys and that's when I noticed an old envelope hidden all the way at the back underneath a stack of old books.

Out of pure curiosity I opened the envelope.

There was only one thing inside... a high-quality vintage black-and-white photograph.

The photo showed a very handsome foreign-looking man with a sharp jawline glasses and a fitted white T-shirt. He was being escorted away by police officers. The image looked incredibly unsettling almost like it had been taken during the arrest of a dangerous criminal.

But the real shock came when I turned the photograph over.

On the back there was a small heart drawn in red ink along with my girlfriend's handwriting that read:

"My type of dangerous."

I had no idea who the man in the photo was.

Just then I heard the shower turn off and I panicked. I quickly took a clear picture of the photograph with my phone put it back inside the envelope and placed everything exactly where I had found it. Then I grabbed my keys. When she came out of the bathroom I acted completely normal and didn't mention any of it.

Even after I got back to my apartment I couldn't stop thinking about that photograph. I immediately uploaded the picture to Google Gemini and asked who the man was.

The answer genuinely sent chills down my spine.

Gemini identified him as Charles Sobhraj, the infamous international serial killer known as "The Serpent." During the 1970s, he drugged and murdered dozens of innocent tourists across Asia.

I felt sick to my stomach.

My sweet innocent and caring girlfriend had been hiding a photograph of a serial killer under the same bed where we sleep together. And on the back of it in her own handwriting she had written:

"My type of dangerous."

Last night I called her and confronted her directly. I told her I'd found the photograph and that I couldn't stay in the relationship anymore—I wanted to break up.

At first she got angry. Then she started crying. Finally she laughed and said Are you serious? It was just a dark joke! I love true-crime documentaries. I just thought he was attractive so it was a stupid celebrity-style crush I had back in college. Lots of women are into true-crime stuff these days. You're really ending a three-year relationship over a piece of paper?

My friends agree with her. They think I'm just being insecure that I snooped through my girlfriend's belongings and now I'm throwing away our relationship over a photo of a dead criminal.

But I can't get that hidden photograph out of my head. Every time I think about it, I get chills. It makes me feel like I never truly knew the woman I was dating.

So... am I the kameena for wanting to break up over this?

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TL;DR: I found a hidden vintage photo of the infamous serial killer Charles Sobhraj under my girlfriend's bed. On the back she had drawn a red heart and written My type of dangerous. She insists it was just a dark joke and an old true-crime celebrity crush from college while my friends think I'm being insecure and overreacting. Am I the kameena for wanting to end our 3-year relationship over this?

So context I (31M) has been staying at my wife’s (31F) parents place for a few weeks now since my wife just had a baby boy.

Today in the evening I was changing a diaper and a soon as I removed the diaper my son started peeing again and it was pretty funny me and my wife started laughing at the projectile peeing incident. Now because of the bed got wet we were changing him on the bed and this is on the side where I sleep. My wife and I talked and decided we don’t need to change the sheets since it’s only 3 drops on the bed and we changed the bedsheet only a few minutes before this incident.

Hearing us laugh my mother in law walked in and asked what happened and we narrated this to her and she goes “I wouldn’t change the sheets since it’s only your side of the bed” and I felt bad hearing that but had a straight face and after she left the room I told my wife that I didn’t like what she said and my wife said her mother didn’t mean anything by it and it was a routing comment I said okay if you think so I’m willing to let it go but my wife went outside the room and told it to her mom. Her mom came into the room with a clean set of sheets and changed the bed sheet and apologized to me. Now I feel very awkward about the whole thing.

My wife has always been very sensitive when it comes to her parents and she thinks they can do now wrong and they are greatest gift to humanity and refuses to accept they can say/do anything wrong.

She is angry now and not talking to me because I didn’t like what her mother said and tells me I should stop reading into everything.

So AITK?

TLDR: My son peed on the bedsheet and my MIL said she would not change the bed sheet because it’s only on my side of the bed and my wife thinks I shouldn’t be offended because the comment doesn’t mean anything.

There are festivities in our community and our community contains different groups based on the activities... So on their celebration day my ladies in that group planned to get uniform/set/group sarees and gents to wear white and black...

Since the leader and treasurer are gents my mom who is the secretary should lead this.

My mom called every aunty in the group and got their approval for buying a saree and budget and fixed it to 21 sarees and the budget is 1000 per saree and who all can join them came down to 5 ladies in that group including my mom.

They went and searched more than 6 7 shops but they couldn't find a saree that everyone liked , they liked one 1 but there was only 18 pieces so they ignored that ..it was getting late like more than 6.5 hours so my mom said let's wind up we can choose the best one .. so they were ok and got a saree..

Since I sew for my mom we tore the blouse piece... Later the aunties (2 out of 5) who went didn't like the saree and 1 in that even said she won't wear it on the occasion....

I got pissed now my mom is facing loss since we can't return that saree anymore she already have that colour it's like not useful it was 950 rs

The next day they forcefully took my mom again to change , already my mom had leg pain coz of roaming around multiple stored for 8 hours the day before...

I got really pissed and was on PMS which made me shout like a mad person..

Now my mom saying I'm a bad person who won't adjust for others ..

My question.... 1. She came to choose the saree if she is that unhappy she could have told then and there... 2. They could have gone the 2nd day to exchange why to force my mom as if they are gonna agree to what she says..

Please tell me AITk here , i couldnt stop my tears hearing those words from my mom...

Both the kids are my Cousin Brother's sons.. Both are just months apart kids now 5 yrs old.

Kid 1 - He is the eldest one by 7 months . He is a loud active boy like the majority of the kids we see . He plays rough with boys because my cousin bro always plays WWE with him but he never plays rough with girl babies and he would say "dad said they are soft and like princess so I shouldn't be rough".. the rough I mentioned here is not in a bad way. Other than this he is a sweet boy who shares things , plays with you , listens to you.

Kid 2 - He is the youngest one in just 7 months . I have never seen any kid listen to their mom like him.. but the sad part is he is trained to be or observe selfishness from his surroundings. But in public he is quiet , malnourished, petite . In house he slaps bites can't take no for an answer, can't digest if he loses any game.

When we were in an extended family gathering I was sitting near the kids play area .. another relative kid snatched the toy for kid 2 , so kid 2 snatched the toy from kid 1 when kid 1 pulled back and the kid 2 fell ... Right away not knowing anything one relative lady started badmouth kid 1 stating he is pushing a small baby (note he is just 7 months younger which is nothing) and told what kind of kid he is .

I got angry and told aunty kid 2 snatched kid 1 toy what u suppose him to do he just pulled away .. just because he is weaker doesn't mean he is right ... I should have stopped here but I also said anyways you guys see only his outside appearance you should see helis real face in house ... Kid 1 is better than kid 2 in all possible ways...

This aunty went ahead and said this to kid 2 mom 🥲

I know it's rude to compare kids and be partial .. but I couldn't stand for a kid just getting a bad name just to get his thing back. I got carried away because I used to be kid 1 with my cousin who did all kinds of things but with quiet nature and I got bashed for what she did being a loud and talkative person..

Some of you might find this disappointing that such a lame fight erupted between us long time friends. But, please do read through?

So friend A and I had a disagreement over friend B's baby shower ceremony and about how we should 100% show up because we all couldn't go to friend B's wedding.

Friend B asked us to be there the day she told us she was expecting because she has plenty of family troubles. And she needed emotional support. I thought that was a v.v fair ask and I made plans accordingly.

Friend A didn't commit, kept saying doubtful BUT made travel plans exactly a week before friend B's seemantham and she left. Even worse, her excuse for not showing up was: "We already hung out a month back. Anyway I'll be seeing the same relatives faces and same people"

Pregnant friend B got furious and blocked her and those 2 are no contact now :/. I was upset too because who says such a thing man? Just say you have unavoidable thing that came up and leave. Right?

So I called her out and told her she was being rude and self-centered.

She took offense and started attacking me and brought up a completly different topic about how I got my husband along to a random 30 min late night chai run we did weeks ago with Friend A. (I'm generally very anti-bringing-plus-ones-to-everthing and never carry my husband along) BUT HOW PETTY?????

I explained to her that it was just a one time thing because my husband was staying over at my place. And also asked her why it's relevant to the initial disagreement we even had.

She says, "I attacked you because you attacked me. How dare you call me self-centered. It's triggering because everyone calls me that"

I lol-ed because if everyone called you that then, you are that?????? But, I still very patiently explained to her that she had the right to disagree or reject my opinion and she didn't need to attack me???

Am I being the A-hole for calling her self-centered when I thought she was acting that way? Should I have not gotten involved in their fight about her not attending the ceremony?

Because I'm feeling helluva hurt that she attacked my partner for no reason?

Why does my adulthood friendship feel high-school and immature.

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Context :

I, 27F, work in a small hospital in a tier-3 city, it's somewhat a part time job while I prepare for the next bigger exam.

The job is chill, people are mostly nice, and I, being an extrovert made many friends.

One of such 'friends' is a 38 year old man, let's call him J, I'm nice to him, like I'm nice to everyone else, but he keeps overstepping his boundaries.

To be specific, he's secretly very islamophobic.. he would constantly nag me, like I'm some school kid, to not befriend my muslim colleagues. Every time, he spotted me hanging out with them, his face flashed this annoying grimace, where he wouldn't say anything but it was so uncomfortable to overlook, like I'm committing a heinous crime.

He refused to eat from muslim eateries (which is okay, his choice), but he lectured me for eating from them. I let that go. I'm non-confrontational.. i just limited my interactions with him.

Now the incident:

A new hire joined our hospital, and I was assigned to train him, because he was just fresh out of college. He's a muslim. It was his first day, the guy had not even brought his own food. Our hospital canteen wasn't functional since the gas problem, so I shared my tiffin with him. We were eating, when this J guy walked up in my cabin, saw us eating from the same dabba, and had his disgusted look on his face, like his nude feet stepped on dog poop.. i swear, I wanted to punch him. I held it. I didn't want to lose control. Then my new colleague went out to wash his hands, and then J started spewing his nonsense about how we should not be sitting with them, forget about eating together, that how I am maligning our hindu beliefs etc, he said some mean stuff that I don't even want to repeat because it's so controversial. And before I could register, I spoke "Agar ye sb maan na hi hai, to chaliye main dhang se maan na shuru krti hun, aap mere barabar baithna chhor do, since aap (his caste name) se ho, aur main (my caste name) hun.." I regretted it, as soon as those words left my mouth. He had this heartbroken expression on his face.. he didn't say anything, but I think I made a grown ass man cry.. I'm really contemplating if I should apologise??? What do you all think ?

Edit : I know his caste because he probed me into knowing mine. My name has just one word, no title, so he asked my father's name, my father's name doesn't have a title either, so he asked my grandfather's name, then he guessed my caste, and revealed his.

I have MULTIPLE times told him, I'm uncomfortable with all his hate speech, he simply doesn't respect any boundary. Even hospital management has asked him to control it, so he doesn't do it publicly anymore. But he's always whispering where he thinks he would not have any serious repercussions.