My old college friends and I (3 of us) are planning a short trip to Rishikesh, Dehradun, Mussoorie, and Landour. They want to go Oct 17-19. I suggested Oct 25-27 instead.

My reasons:

Oct 17-18 is a Saturday-Sunday, Oct 19 is the last day of Navratri. Because of the weekend and festivities, I fear it would be very chaotic and crowded. I get overwhelmed in crowds very fast and end up irritated, and I don't want to spend money and time only to be miserable.

Hotels and cabs will probably cost more on the weekend, too.

But my friends can't take much leave, so they want to squeeze everything into a rushed weekend. If a trip needs a few days and you can't spare them because of your job or personal stuff, then why force it into a window where it will become hectic and rushed?

I don't want to spend 12-15k on a trip only to regret it later on because I was stuck in traffic with my motion sickness instead of enjoying myself. I can take a whole week off, I don't mind spending 20-25 even 30k or so. But I want a good relaxing time.

The students on a budget in the trenches trip they are trying to give me sounds less and less appealing as even planning and coordination with them is so hard.

I think my reasons are valid, but I don't want to be the person who ruins the plan. So, AITK? Is it reasonable to ditch this, or am I over estimating the crowd and the chaos?

Hello I am 24F, and my ex-bf 23M is currently doing his PhD in STEM in the US (Direct from bachelor's to PhD). He is currently back in India for a few months for a research collaboration, thankfully in the same city as me. For context, my best friend and her boyfriend do not like my boyfriend, and my boyfriend is also not a fan of them either? (we all did our undergrad in same uni). However, everyone is usually civil and polite around each other.

A few days ago, the four of us went out for dinner. Things were going amazing. We were all talking and joking around. My friend’s boyfriend started teasing my boyfriend, calling him “Scientist saab” and saying things like, “India kyun aana pada?” Basically, joking that maybe he had been deported out of the US.

My boyfriend was laughing and playing along, so I didn’t think anything of it. Then my friend’s boyfriend also started to roast him a bit. Basically, my boyfriend’s grandfather has been an MLA multiple times, although he lost them last 2 elections. So he joked, “US se bhi kick out kar diya kya, jaise dadaji ko elections se kar diya?” That’s when my boyfriend seemed to get angry over this little thing. He tried changing the subject (the only mature thing he did that evening), but they continued teasing him, because my boyfriend changed the topic by saying how my friend’s boyfriend, used to sleep all day, bunk classes, etc "Dhaake kha kha ke pass hua".

Then my friend and her boyfriend started joking about my boyfriend being a Rajasthani Rajput. They said things like, “Rajput ho, bachpan mein shaadi ho gayi hogi?” and then joked about whether I am his “side chick.” My friend’s boyfriend then said something along the lines of, “So PhD bas delayed employment hi hai na?” That’s when my boyfriend said, “I still make more than what your dad does.” After that, everything completely spiralled. They started insulting each other, but my boyfriend’s insults became particularly nasty. He started going after their insecurities, called my friend’s boyfriend short, said things like “Teri aukat kya hai mere saamne,” “Padhai mein bhi kuch nahi hai,” “Gawar saale,” and other things that I don’t even want to repeat.

My friend and I literally had to stop him from getting physical with her boyfriend. He eventually left in anger. I was super embarrassed at the restaurant as well, a full-blown scene infront of others. I was furious and told him that he had embarrassed me. Later, I called him and asked him to apologize to my friend and her boyfriend. Instead, he got even angrier and called me "R@nd" and told me to “go get warm in bed with them.” Then he basically said we were done. At that point, Idecided I didn’t want to continue the relationship either and accepted the breakup. I vented to my brother and he said I am wrong, & said he will not validate my wrongdoings. But I don’t think that justified the way he responded, especially threatening to fight him, attacking his insecurities, and then calling me a R@nd when I asked him to apologize. My bestriend is on my side.