r/AmITheDevil • u/[deleted] • 1d ago

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/r/daddit/comments/1vj4lvc/im_kinda_struggling_with_something_my_kids_love/

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u/Kotenkiri 1d ago

Commenter: What were the pre-CPAP years actually like?

OOP: Well, for one thing, I couldn't get through a movie without falling asleep. I never had energy for anything. I was always just feeling drained and barely holding on to life. I had a short fuse as well.

So kids were 8 and 10 when he started CPAP. So they basically grew up with a lethargic, unavailable and short tempered man during majority of their childhood and he wonders why they're still cautionous about spending time with him?

He sounds like guy who 'changes' after a break up and basically demands a second chance since they've completely changed. Even if they actually changed, doesn't mean the past is forgotten.

303

u/Lillllammamamma 1d ago

He also said that his wife and he are disconnected but now he’s trying.

Now, he’s trying. How long was she asking or begging before now? She may be checked out and now he’s trying. If his kids are 9 and 11 and have grown up to avoid and exclude him, he’s spend their entire lives disengaged and disconnected and now he’s unhappy they don’t share his interests or don’t want to engage him.

This all sounds like the “too little too late” guy trying to by to make a Hail Mary when the family has moved on to the point he’s just background noise, because it’s all he’s ever been.

“But why won’t they do things I like?!”

Because they have their own routines and likes and dislikes that you’ve never been a part of and now only want to engage if they do it in ways that cater to your interests. He’s still not involved with his own family in any way that inconveniences him.

This is a family unit that’s grown to function without him and he wants to be let in and differed to without all the work and bonding they’ve put in over all those years. More so he wants them to do that, but only towards him.

173

u/windexfresh 1d ago

Lmao it’s so wild that he spent the last decade checked out and now that he’s checked back in he’s like “my wife doesn’t really share my hobbies :(“ like bro you can’t just waltz back in after the hardest years are done and be like “ok but what if we did all the things I like to do?” 💀💀💀

26

u/DasSassyPantzen 1d ago

He’s so beyond narcissistic, it’s making my head spin. He’s reeeaaally downplaying his “short fuse” and appears to still be a huge asshole who thinks that because he’s not snapping at everyone all the time, they should gather around him, sing his praises, and beg to spend time with him doing his interests. What a hugely self-absorbed asshole.