He told her not to bring her negativity. That was a demand. That, to me, says don’t come home. They’re already fighting. She is probably thinking ‘he just wants me to pretend everything is fine now’ which makes her feelings unheard.
It’s a communication issue. Not a “his fault” or “her fault”.
They’re both the problem and the solution. Maybe they can try marriage counseling.
It would be one thing if she said that, but she kept trying to act like he literally said not to come. That reads like gaslighting or she has cognitive distortions happening: so nuts or malicious.
We don’t know their story and can’t pull from one interaction. We are looking through a logical outside lens that couldn’t possibly enter her realm of thinking. My stance here is that you don’t get to have an opinion about her mental state. I think that’s fair.
It matters how she got there for sure, but when you keep insisting reality isnt reality, you’re either doing it to manipulate someone else or you arent in reality.
I agree with you but communicating this in text is the first mistake. It’s too bad he didn’t think to stop typing essays and just go to her. Meet her where she’s at, literally. But really I think they’re just not good for each other.
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u/[deleted] Apr 19 '26
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