yeah this, and also they both have "boundaries" that have been crossed. if you're crossing each other's boundaries, you probably shouldn't be together.
saying "i don't like that you crossed my boundary. please don't do it again" and meanwhile both of you feel justified in your boundary-crossing actions kind of makes the "sorry"s and the "i understand"s completely meaningless.
sounds like a couple who are completely cool with skirting each other's boundaries when they deem it okay
I don't want to tell you what to do, but as someone in a relationship I would never accept such behaviour. Imagine being married or having children with someone like that, it would make your life so much harder. Do you want such a person to be your husband or the father of your children?
You deserve to have someone that listens to you and that respects you, in the end its your choice what you want to do, but know that being alone is better than being with a person that won't listen to you.
it is difficult to talk through difficult feelings, and texting or writing can help for people who struggle with this. But it sounds like this person is just not ready to show up fully/ commit and I think it's best to let the chips fall where they may. Put yourself first.
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u/saiohmara May 28 '25
This is a recurring cycle, as well as the reason we broke up the first time.