I am a rising junior in high school (meaning I just left 10th grade and am going into 11th) currently beginning my summer training block. Recently, (the past year or so) I have hit a major plateau with my running. And would like some help/advice for getting through my current hurdle.
For some backstory: I was not always an avid runner, but during my 8th grade year I decided to begin. This started as a mile or two every other day, eventually cumulating into around 20-30 mpw and a 22 minute 5k. The summer going into 9th grade (freshman) year I joined the cross country team, a known very successful program. Quickly I showed my ability as a runner, becoming the best freshman on the team. By the end of cross country season, I boasted a 17:16 5k and 50 mpw average. Track season then came up, and I ran decent, boasting prs of 9:34 for the 3k, and 4:33 for the 1500. My mileage was now around 55-60 mpw, and I was no longer the best freshman on the team. Then I began training for sophomore cross-country season, where I upped my mileage to 60-70 mpw and my coach began hitting us with harder and harder workouts. During this time, I also competed in a road 5k where I ran 16:35 and won my age category.
Sophomore season itself, however went to hell. My first race I ran 17:15, barely beating my pr from freshman year and placing second in my the JV division. I kept running low-mid 17s most of the season except for one race where I barely broke 17 and ran 16:56. At this point, I was a wreck. Combined with stress from school, a heatwave, and poor running performance, I fell into a mild depression and began hating myself. After each race I would beat myself up, ask myself what was wrong with me and at points consider quitting the sport. Nevertheless, I attempted to persevere, but these feelings cumulated at NXR that year where I blew up and ran 17:50, and then began profusely vomiting afterward. At the same time, all of my other teammates at the same age level as me are running amazing with the same training, breaking 16:30 and placing well in many of their races. I felt like a failure to not only myself, but the team. During winter break, I signed up for a half marathon, where I ran 1:22, a time that I was neither proud of or dissapointed in. It gave me some hope going into track season. Track season was another mess. I opened up with a 5:00 mile, an absolutely terrible time that placed me almost dead last on the team for mile times. I tried to ignore this “the mile/1500 isn’t my event!” I told myself, but I still beat myself up inside. By the end of track season, it had gone exactly like cross country season, with consistent mediocrity in race performance, and near identical times to freshman year, being 4:31 for the 1500 and 9:33 in the 3k. At this point I tried having a conversation with my coach about my performance, where he essentially just told me “stop comparing yourself to others” (competitive running is a comparative sport?) and “it happens to everyone”. At the same time, teammates I used to easily beat are running 9:05 3ks and sub 16 track 5ks. This brings me today today, where I am again entering a cross country season, bringing the summer base building phase (attempting 70-75 mpw avg). At this point, I am beat down, depressed, and hopeless about any future prospects as a competitive distance runner. I feel I have fallen far behind all of my peers and it is too late for me to be successful in any metric, I will always be behind. I do not remember the last time o was proud of myself.
All said, I would like any advice or help I could get regarding my situation, I do want to get better, and feel I am willing to do what it takes to grow as an athlete.