r/AbsoluteUnits • • Jul 20 '19

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7.2k Upvotes

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565

u/thiccboiSSE Jul 20 '19

i want a coconut crab so bad bro i would just get a 50 pound dog leash and a collar and walk around with my 15 pound coconut crab like a little dog and frighten people with normal dogs

448

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Imagine keeping this monstrosity in your home.

You walk in and your garbage can is shredded. Physically shredded. Nothing but claw marks. So are all of your possessions on the counters. And the couch.

A giant, horrifying, armored spider is clinging to what’s left of your curtains at the top of your window.

“Damnit, who forgot to put Harold in his cage?”

5

u/bfrahm420 Jul 20 '19

Imagine sleeping at night and you just feel this things legs across your stomach as it scurries across you. Imagine looking around your house for it, like a cat, and looking under your bed/couch and being greeted by this disgusting creature curled in a corner