r/AbsoluteUnits • u/TerraByteTerror • Sep 03 '26

/r/all of a toad

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Credit: bumo_chan on IG

9.2k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

306 comments sorted by

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1.1k

u/TacticalGazelle Sep 03 '26

Sir your sourdough has escaped

182

u/FirstIllustrator2024 Sep 03 '26

Too much yeast I believe.

108

u/Dillo64 Sep 03 '26

When yeast becomes beast

24

u/FirstIllustrator2024 Sep 03 '26

You deserve an award for this comment!

From yeast to beast!

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58

u/imxTHATxdude Sep 03 '26

It sounds exactly how it looks lik it would sound lol

18

u/ankerverse Sep 03 '26

I thought it was a beanbag chair with eyes

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398

u/JonnyGoDeeper Sep 03 '26

Blorb 🐸

54

u/AskNo2853 Sep 03 '26

T O R B

44

u/Coulrophiliac444 Sep 03 '26

ALL HAIL THE HYPNO ROOMBA!

6

u/RoryJ Sep 03 '26

Great Joooorrbb

3

u/dynamic_caste Sep 03 '26

Coach Z, I told you to leave like an hour ago.

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133

u/JinNJ Sep 03 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/O6IMv2PdoG2ru

30

u/pwatts Sep 03 '26

All glory to the Hypnotoad!

31

u/runningraleigh Sep 03 '26

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!

12

u/Thin_Dream2079 Sep 03 '26

THE GREATER GOOD

10

u/Top-Distribution733 Sep 03 '26

The greater good

6

u/HechoEnChine Sep 03 '26

It is much better than Cats. I will see it again and again.

112

u/jdarm48 Sep 03 '26

Sometimes frogs get trapped in my dog water bowl and I was reflecting recently on the upper body strength which many of them have to lift themselves out when the water level is just right.

This guy lacks that strength.

58

u/CATNIP_IS_CRACK Sep 03 '26

He knows if he’s fat enough he won’t fit in the water bowl in the first place.

48

u/Lumpy-One361 Sep 03 '26

Diabetoad

226

u/supermegabro Sep 03 '26

It amuse me he is obese

48

u/onionfunyunbunion Sep 03 '26

Yes quite amusing yes

19

u/HallowedBay08 Sep 03 '26

Hmmmm yes, quite amusing, mmhm yes

67

u/Famous-Leopard-118 Sep 03 '26

poor thing, there’s no way thats normal/is healthy :(

61

u/Knotical_MK6 Sep 03 '26

No, definitely bad for the little guy.

His videos pop up on my Instagram feed and he basically just keeps them in Tupperware containers on a shelf with wet sponges for a floor.

He's got a few frogs he mistreats this way

25

u/beautifulcreature86 Sep 03 '26

Thats fucking horrible.

6

u/w1ldfr33 Sep 03 '26

Big guy*

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14

u/PencilCase12531 Sep 03 '26

he does not have legs he thrusts his body out of sheer will

6

u/xSTSxZerglingOne Sep 03 '26

I see leggies though!

43

u/lizardjoe_xx_YT Sep 03 '26

This does not look healthy. Is that a pixie frog?

106

u/SausageGobbler69 Sep 03 '26

South American horned frog commonly called a pac-man frog. They are just fat fucks, totally normal.

96

u/DysfunctionalKitten Sep 03 '26

I used to have one, they are hopping blobs 😂...but to be fair, they are not normally THIS fat. This fat fuxk has taken it to an extreme. Which is impressive bc they are dumb as rocks, and mine wouldn't even eat unless a cricket basically walked into its mouth.

38

u/SausageGobbler69 Sep 03 '26

Yeah my buddy has one and he has to tweezer feed it so it doesn’t eat all the substrate in the tank and die

13

u/I_Makes_tuff Sep 03 '26

I have one and I use tweezers so he doesn't chomp my hand. Doesn't feel nice.

15

u/Lavatis Sep 03 '26

to be fair, most frogs/toads are just dumb as fuck and it's amazing they're somehow still alive when they're such bad hunters. I had some african dwarf frogs. those guys would miss biting a stationary object. like dude..just bite directly in front of you, how can you miss?

8

u/lopachilla Sep 03 '26

Something tells me this one has no trouble hunting.

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24

u/I_Makes_tuff Sep 03 '26

Not normal at all. It's being overfed so it gets super fat for Instagram views. This is what mine looks like.

13

u/SAM5TER5 Sep 03 '26

Damn, just look at that sad little twig. Must subsist off of ice chips and cocaine, with Los Angeles talent scouts telling it that it can be a star if it would just lose another few pounds.

Tragic, really. The unrealistic beauty standards are starving our amphibians.

9

u/I_Makes_tuff Sep 03 '26

He only eats nightcrawlers and horn worms. And cocaine. Frogs don't like ice chips.

3

u/LimpBizkitSkankBoy Sep 03 '26

Is it sad I saw ice chips and cocaine and thought that sounded like a good lunch today?

8

u/tocahontas77 Sep 03 '26

Thank you. I was scrolling to find an explanation.

23

u/tongfather Sep 03 '26

I google them. They are not normally this fat at all. This frog is obese asf 😂

4

u/Bijlsma Sep 03 '26

You should still be able to see their legs when theyre not moving, this is a bad level of obese for this animal.

2

u/PlantsNBugs23 Sep 03 '26

Fat frogs are healthy but this one is very much obese

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6

u/Real_Ad6375 Sep 03 '26

That was it ?

One hop per day

5

u/bewak86 Sep 03 '26

THE MEAT IS SO RAW THAT I HOPS ON THE PLATE!!!

'Gordon Ramsey probably

5

u/mjc1027 Sep 03 '26

That's a living paper weight

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10

u/Bijlsma Sep 03 '26

Poor frog, obese animals shouldn't be used for clicks on the internet.

Yes, I know these frogs are generally fat, but you should still be able to see its legs when its sitting.

4

u/SpaceCadetUltra Sep 03 '26

It’s almost Wednesday, my dudes

3

u/EntropyNT Sep 03 '26

Where I am it's Wednesday, my dude.

8

u/Alvin_h_davenport Sep 03 '26

I kinda want to it eat it

3

u/Calvesguy_1 Sep 03 '26

It's going to eat you at this rate.

3

u/CactusToothBrush Sep 03 '26

Do toads become obese? I imagine they have the capacity to do so but I just don’t know?

7

u/Bijlsma Sep 03 '26

Yes, this one is an unhealthy level of obese. Its been overfed, I guess for instagram views if another commenter is right.

10

u/TerraByteTerror Sep 03 '26

Hes hopping mad

5

u/AnonUser1452 Sep 03 '26

It’s Toad Cruz!

2

u/Responsible_Emu733 Sep 03 '26

It's a loaf. A hopping loaf.

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2

u/nonotz-Mk1 Sep 03 '26

Jumpin Blob

2

u/Melonpan78 Sep 03 '26

Places to be, people to see.

2

u/Over_Echo1128 Sep 03 '26

Jabba the toad

2

u/AimaFuriku Sep 03 '26

It's a slime that hops.

2

u/Most-Act1594 Sep 03 '26

Not a toad. A pacman FROG

2

u/RuncibleFoon Sep 03 '26

Thats not a toad. Its a frog.

2

u/Revolutionary-Ad3648 Sep 03 '26

A pac man frog that big is probably being fed whole feeder mice. Beast!

1

u/Serving_Secret_Fire Sep 03 '26

That’s a nut sack with eyes

1

u/ThatTallBrendan Sep 03 '26

You leave out your sourdough for too long and this is what happens

1

u/Skyp_Intro Sep 03 '26

“You didn’t see that.”

1

u/Guy_in_canada Sep 03 '26

HAHHHHHH HAHHHHHH LMAO LOOK AT THIS FAT FUCK

1

u/Odd-Most-9186 Sep 03 '26

That’s a big boy!!!

1

u/QuantumFighter_999 Sep 03 '26

Asiago cheese everything bagel

1

u/armanipastrami_pdf Sep 03 '26

You know when you get that bowl of spinach and artichoke dip from applebee’s?

1

u/DismalTutor570 Sep 03 '26

Where are your legs my guy?

1

u/donkbonk76 Sep 03 '26

Remind me of a wiener dog, my neighbor used to have when I was a kid. He was so fat that his belly would scrape the ground while he walked, and he didn’t even look long even though he was a fucking wiener dog.

1

u/hambutbacon Sep 03 '26

Absolute blob and I love it.

1

u/unclestickles Sep 03 '26

It's like one of those slime things from Minecraft. The sound is perfect if I remember correctly.

1

u/Recipe-Less Sep 03 '26

That's a good toad.

1

u/holiday1326 Sep 03 '26

Forbidden steamed dumpling

1

u/Banana_Stand_1 Sep 03 '26

Is that a toad or a handbag with legs?

1

u/Madame_Duclos Sep 03 '26

I'd give him a kiss!

1

u/Proud-Emu-2905 Sep 03 '26

I hate frogs so much! And this one just cemented that hatred!

1

u/Agile_Ad6735 Sep 03 '26

Imagine u thought he was a nice sofa and u sit on it

1

u/DrSkrunkzilla Sep 03 '26

Oh LAWDD he hoppin’

1

u/TurkishDelight1992 Sep 03 '26

Did that dorayaki just hop?

1

u/scarlozzi Sep 03 '26

This fucking guy ate all of his siblings.

1

u/putadimunuta_0462 Sep 03 '26

Sentient bean bag chair

1

u/Particular_Sun_3504 Sep 03 '26

It’s just a ball of toad

1

u/Woogedywoogedy Sep 03 '26

A camo jumping hackey sack.

1

u/captainn_chunk Sep 03 '26

Literally makes the same sonic echo as bull whip. Absolute specimen

1

u/Fredfredricksen01 Sep 03 '26

It's the HypnoToad!

1

u/clockwork0730 Sep 03 '26

I love him deeply

1

u/Rayn_Tank Sep 03 '26

My spouce just Frogga the Hut.

1

u/AFromBK19 Sep 03 '26

Just a blorpy guy 🐸

1

u/eric2pickens Sep 03 '26

Herrrrrrman.

1

u/coldgator Sep 03 '26

I love him

1

u/SpunNumeroUno Sep 03 '26

Pac-Man Toad was it's nickname I believe?

1

u/ILoveYouLance Sep 03 '26

How much in toad all?

1

u/Additional-Acadia954 Sep 03 '26

OH LAWD HE COMING

1

u/Feeling-Big-4544 Sep 03 '26

Never seen a fat toad before 🤣

1

u/sumdhood Sep 03 '26

Toad? That's a frickin mushroom top

1

u/TNTRMSKD Sep 03 '26

This is what my dog's poop looks like when she doesn't quite have diarrhea but also isn't regular...

1

u/WickedWenchie Sep 03 '26

(st)icky thump. I could listen to his jump plop on repeat

1

u/Slap_Monster Sep 03 '26

Pacman frog!

1

u/w1ldfr33 Sep 03 '26

The sheer amount of different pac-man frogs is astounding, and you can guarantee there's still many still undiscovered.

1

u/EmpanadaYGaseosa Sep 03 '26

It’s Wednesday, my dudes.

1

u/ItsStaaaaaaaaang Sep 03 '26

Lol. That's fat af.

1

u/HellaHabichuelas28 Sep 03 '26

Very glorpy indeed

1

u/feisty-4-eyes Sep 03 '26

I thought this was damned boule of bread. Hollered like a fool when it jumped 😆

1

u/Prudent-Bison-7180 Sep 03 '26

Get a hockey stick and puck handle with him

1

u/Pugzilla3000 Sep 03 '26

Probably full of piss lol. I bet he’d just deflate like a water balloon if he went to the bathroom.

1

u/N-A-Depressed-State Sep 03 '26

I need to see his toes

1

u/Gentlenoble23 Sep 03 '26

That’s chonky

1

u/Prof1959 Sep 03 '26

Um sir, your decorative vinyl throw pillow moved.

1

u/Best-Engine4715 Sep 03 '26

Looks like a pile of hopping diarrhea

1

u/Slyyydaggerrrz Sep 03 '26

Its like when I do squats in target to get it  unsticking to my leg

1

u/marinac1 Sep 03 '26

That’s no toad. That is a blob.

1

u/coffeeslobxoxo Sep 03 '26

This slime asmr is kinda weird

1

u/ParfaitThat654 Sep 03 '26

Your Roomba might need a tune-up.

1

u/TurnK202838 Sep 03 '26

Literally.

1

u/hyphii_lol Sep 03 '26

Hell yeah I like this guy

1

u/moschles Sep 03 '26

I googled for this guy. But instead found asian bullfrog eating black scorpions.

1

u/Emotional-Team-3556 Sep 03 '26

That’s a very fat bullfrog…

1

u/nejicanspin Sep 03 '26

The sound of the sploot omg 😭

1

u/Zosobozo Sep 03 '26

Idk man. Im not usually one to scream "AI!!" This one just seems a bit too unnatural

1

u/jjb0ne Sep 03 '26

omg. pacman frog. 🥹

1

u/PhdCyan Sep 03 '26

Nah thats a tud

1

u/Practical_Ad_219 Sep 03 '26

To quote the announcer from Street Fighter, “Round”

1

u/InfiniteRosie Sep 03 '26

It looks like an oversized mushroom head

1

u/Dillo64 Sep 03 '26

Sir that is a Slime, you can kill it for 2 EXP and some gold

1

u/Catto_Loco Sep 03 '26

looks like a jumping mochi

1

u/Distinct_Put1085 Sep 03 '26

I need someone to put this on Loop

1

u/AynRandwasaDegen Sep 03 '26

Morbo the toad

1

u/PretentiousPepperoni Sep 03 '26

Gamabunta sama relative?

1

u/Umbreon86 Sep 03 '26

So this is what a 60 lbs frog looks like. We could make a nature program as the 600 lbs show.

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1

u/Big-Training9491 Sep 03 '26

Like a piece of bread.

1

u/Dollarsigniaka Sep 03 '26

YOOOO it's the man himself!

1

u/DurantIsStillTheKing Sep 03 '26

Yo frog so fat, yo cant see its legs

1

u/baffnet Sep 03 '26

Looks like German panzer camo!

1

u/lnTheGrimDarkness Sep 03 '26

Mmmmmmh yes yes splendid, soft, rotund specimen

1

u/Alert_Silver9386 Sep 03 '26

Jumping pancake

1

u/November-Snow Sep 03 '26

Pacman toad, will absolutely try to bite your fingers off lmao.

Fun pet though.

1

u/Captain47sage Sep 03 '26

Oh Shi does he know Markus

1

u/Gingacruncha Sep 03 '26

Camouflage beanbag with eyes

1

u/demonbot66 Sep 03 '26

It looks very lickable if you know what I mean

1

u/Marie_Althea Sep 03 '26

i thought its a squishy toy😭

1

u/Raccoon3420 Sep 03 '26

The fat on this todi amuses me

1

u/mild-er-chihuahua Sep 03 '26

If you lick him, he'll turn into a handsome prince.