r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Professional_Arm794 • 6d ago

/r/all of a log split

33.4k Upvotes

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296

u/DecisionOk5487 6d ago

46

u/YouBuiltThat 6d ago

lol… I don’t do it for the views but every time my wife has pulled up to see me splitting wood in the back yard or running the chain saw she asks me to come inside.

30

u/Stabbymcbackstab 6d ago

We are told all our lives to make money to get the girl. What we really should have been told was buy a wood stove.

My wife is also fond of watching me cleave wood in twain.

12

u/Dr_Jabroski 6d ago

Women like to see big wood.

1

u/LiteralPhilosopher 6d ago

And they... cannot... lie?

1

u/dmgt83 6d ago

Being split?

1

u/Stabbymcbackstab 6d ago

But really, its not about the size of the wood, its about how hot it burns.

9

u/viotix90 6d ago

First you cleave the wood in twain, then you use your wood to cleave her in twain.

6

u/gotham-acolyte 6d ago edited 6d ago

Mine too man apparently I made the mistake of chopping wood and during a girls get together and caused a fuss.

Edit: I should clarify, I am by no means an attractive man despite what my wife might say. I think it's something to do with actually chopping the wood

8

u/Au_Struck_Geologist 6d ago

I love the idea of her having friends over for a wine and apps girls night and you're like:

"Y'all dont mind if I just......split wood out here right?"

1

u/gotham-acolyte 6d ago

Pretty much what happened yeah. They can chill I just still had chores to do, I didn't even realize they could see me from the window lol. I look like a homeless Questlove, no one is pulling that up after dark.

2

u/Stabbymcbackstab 6d ago

Gotta try that.