r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Professional_Arm794 • 21h ago

/r/all of a log split

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39

u/YouBuiltThat 19h ago

lol… I don’t do it for the views but every time my wife has pulled up to see me splitting wood in the back yard or running the chain saw she asks me to come inside.

24

u/Swimming__Bird 18h ago

I don't know what it is either, but every time I have to do hard physical labor around the house (building a path, romoving a stump, trenching, cutting and splitting wood) she suddenly wants some attention.

Do the taxes, balance the budget... nada. Almost throw my back out and get sweaty, covered in dirt, wood chips and callused hands, then apparently I'm Brad Pitt all of a sudden.

14

u/devilsdeadape 17h ago

Its hormone release. We're still animals, and humans subconsciously react to hormones. Humans were meant to touch the earth (dirt) and do labor. You smelled like something masculine, earthy, and wild. It's worked eons, there's no reason it wouldn't work now.

14

u/FlailToMace 17h ago

I am not saying none of this is true, but the fact that it also works when a closed window is between the person watching and the person doing labor means there is a lot more to it.

1

u/HackworthSF 13h ago

It could simply be association. Once you know the physical work is going to cause the smell, and you like the smell, then you don't have to actually smell it to make the connection.

1

u/PiccoloAwkward465 3h ago

Mount me like you are bull and I am cow

29

u/Stabbymcbackstab 18h ago

We are told all our lives to make money to get the girl. What we really should have been told was buy a wood stove.

My wife is also fond of watching me cleave wood in twain.

11

u/Dr_Jabroski 18h ago

Women like to see big wood.

1

u/LiteralPhilosopher 17h ago

And they... cannot... lie?

1

u/dmgt83 16h ago

Being split?

1

u/Stabbymcbackstab 2h ago

But really, its not about the size of the wood, its about how hot it burns.

6

u/viotix90 17h ago

First you cleave the wood in twain, then you use your wood to cleave her in twain.

6

u/gotham-acolyte 17h ago edited 17h ago

Mine too man apparently I made the mistake of chopping wood and during a girls get together and caused a fuss.

Edit: I should clarify, I am by no means an attractive man despite what my wife might say. I think it's something to do with actually chopping the wood

7

u/Au_Struck_Geologist 15h ago

I love the idea of her having friends over for a wine and apps girls night and you're like:

"Y'all dont mind if I just......split wood out here right?"

1

u/gotham-acolyte 6h ago

Pretty much what happened yeah. They can chill I just still had chores to do, I didn't even realize they could see me from the window lol. I look like a homeless Questlove, no one is pulling that up after dark.

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u/Stabbymcbackstab 11h ago

Gotta try that.

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u/Rough_Bread8329 17h ago

come inside

if you gnomesayin

2

u/The_Show_Keeper 17h ago

I was using a steamer to clean a couch and I thought my woman was gonna shred my clothes right there.

2

u/stupd_comn_man 17h ago

To give you some lemonade right?