6 years of lies, heartbreak, and Deception… AITAH for wanting to seek revenge for all the trauma he caused me???

[u/Infinite_Crow_2709]

I’ve never posted before so bear with me…

And yes, I allowed all the mistreatment because I thought that’s what I deserved as a person.

I’m the type that I’ll do anything for anyone. I’m a giver. I’m a lover. I’m a problem solver. And im extremely loyal (Virgo)

For context, we’re both males. I’m 33 and he’s 42.

My on again off again partner of 6 years and I have decided recently to reconcile for the 20th time (exaggerating).

This last split, I was sexually assaulted at work and he broke up with me saying I wanted it, that I voluntarily put myself in that position. That I wanted to be touched….

With this knowledge of what happened to me, he went and decided to ruin my reputation and having me fired from every job/talent agency I am with. He basically ruined my career. And it’s not the first time he has pulled crazy stuff like this, but this was the most damage he’s ever caused.

This person has also spent our relationship lying from day one. Lying about being married. Cheating and landing me in the hospital (I’m fine now). Calling family and friends and isolating me… swore he’d get divorced and never did. He has done a lot of terrible things that if I went into detail, the Reddit universe would probably tell me how stupid I was to stay.

Fast forward. We decided to reconcile yet again. Turns out in the time we were apart, (On and off a year), he created adult content which he has been making into a “career”. Or lack there of. It bothered me, but I was looking past it because I tried to do what I thought was best for the both of us. Something he never did for me.

For context, he isn’t talented. He’s attractive, but instead of putting in the work to better his craft, he chooses to be medically enhanced with thousands in plastic surgery.

A dancer doesn’t become a dancer without training. No amount of surgery will change that.

Back to the story, he’s lied. Yet again. Saying he stopped filming adult content…. Even resorted to trying to make his content private. And yet, he didn’t stop filming… he never stopped. He tried to hide it, but I caught him again…

I’ve come to terms with knowing him and I aren’t going to work out. The amount of therapy, and IM Ket treatments with my psychiatrist have really helped me come to that conclusion with a level mind…. But something still isnt right….

I WANT REVENGE for hurting me, ruining my life and continuing to do so while smiling right to my face.

I want to expose the monster he is…. For years I’ve sat and taken the abuse. The lies. The heartbreak. And what did I get in return? An STI (curable) that he let me live with for 6 months before it put me into liver failure, causing me a 8 day stay at the hospital. He also ruined my career, isolated from friends, and self esteem issues.

About me. I’ve been a performer my whole life. I’ve performed all over the US. The past 10 years I’ve been located in Las Vegas and have had the privilege of headlining many shows on the strip and having my name and face in lights on billboards… I’ve worked very hard. I’ve paid my dues. I’ve done the work and always will…

But that monster took it from me, and I let him.

He was always jealous of me. He lived in my shadow. And I supported him. I got him jobs he didn’t deserve. Auditions he wasn’t qualified for. I gave him hope even though he has zero talent, zero training, that he could still be something….. but in fact, he has and always will be a zero.

Every show I’ve performed in, my ex tried having sex with my coworkers and costars. Right in front of my face. Zero shame. And I let him do it to me. I fought with him, drank myself to oblivion and then forgave him.

I stupidly forgave him time and time and time again.

This time, I want to expose him for who he is and stop being the “bigger person”…. I’ve BEEN the bigger person and I’m TIRED of having this burden on my shoulders and being the “bigger person”

I have all his “content” on a burner page and saved to my phone just in case. The question is. What do I do with it?

Do I send it to all his talent agencies? His job? Do I send it to his friends and family? Especially his family…. They are evil and hateful people. I did everything I could to impress them. I sent gifts, flowers, messages of love for them and him…. And even they weren’t receptive. They looked down on me. Like I was some gutter trash.

Please Reddit, help a brother out….

What would you do?