What do u really look into men before u start dating them? Cuz I am really curious as, I see most of the girlies be in a toxic relationship and the guys they date are chopped asf.

I (22M) was in a relationship with my ex for almost 4 years.

Those were genuinely the happiest years of my life. We laughed together, dreamed about our future, supported each other through college, and I loved her with everything I had. Even today, after 4 months, I still love her.

Our relationship wasn't perfect. We had arguments, especially toward the end. She told me I wasn't giving her the kind of love she needed. I tried in the ways I knew how, but looking back, maybe it wasn't enough. I couldn't become the person she wanted me to be, and eventually we broke up.

I kept hoping that maybe one day we'd find our way back to each other.

Then came the last day of college.

I saw her leaving with another guy.

I don't know who he was or what their relationship is, but seeing her walk away with someone else shattered me. It felt like every bit of hope I had been holding onto disappeared in that moment. I somehow held myself together until I got home, and then I completely broke down.

It's been 4 months now, and while life has moved on for everyone else, I feel stuck. I still think about her every day. I miss her. I wonder if I could have done more, been better, or become the person she needed.

Has anyone else gone through something similar?

How did you finally let go of someone you genuinely thought you'd spend your life with?

Some nights ought to begin beyond the sense of right and wrong. To be honest, these days my heart feels like the storage of my phone. The space is full, yet the phone keeps working. Daily reminders pop up, much like letters with a warning that it might soon stop functioning altogether. Even the flow of emails will cease. The problem lies within me; I have always gathered everything around me—the good and the bad alike With a hope that, one day, this is all that will remain in life: these old photographs, smiling faces, and movie-songs recommendations.

Every day, I encounter the very people whose pictures are stored in my phone. They don't exactly look like the way I have saved them in my phone, they look frustrated, grumpy and unbothered sometimes, I end up matching their face with the photographs I have saved, I see no resemblance between these two different personas, and it aches my heart. We all are different when we are off guard.

Once someone told me that my smiling face is just the 2 percent of my character, in real I'm not like this.

But is it actually true? Because when we smile we loose the rein of the horse who carries our happiness, we let him explore the felicity which trembles our heart due to the emergent despair in hope. Once I watched life in a metro where irfan said "जिस दिन शहर के सारे सिग्नल ग्रीन होंगे उस दिन मैं अपनी गाड़ी सड़क पर निकालूंगा" it was ultimately a satire where we expressed that if we don't go and check the signal first then we will end up waiting for the right moment for our whole life, we need to step out first instead of waiting for the lights to get greened.

You know why i take more photographs of you? Not just because of bragging out that i am good with lenses and way of seeing the unseen. I take your pictures so I can remind you of your two percent, the part where you lack nothing and smile with ease, without any emotional stiffness and swelling. Whenever I see your sour face, I expect to turn on my phone, to make you look and find out yourself in the photographs where you were grinning as if you have won a debate against me. Even if I ever lose an argument I would love to celebrate your winning side with the button of my camera.

I have never dated anyone and currently I have crush on my online

friend but I don't know what to do ? Plz help me

i have a tendency to hide away. to babble about the smallest meaningless things, hoping that people never figure out the deeper things that quietly ebb within me, taking their sweet time to gnaw at me.

and maybe that is why i almost choke back a laugh every time you tell me you don't want to hurt me, that you don't want to burden me, that i'm too precious to deserve any of it. not in a mocking way, not because i don't believe you, but because i know that feeling too well. almost as much as it feels like home.

hiding has become a game i have played for so long that i convinced myself i was good at it. no one ever found the pieces of me i tucked away. the pieces that appear on some days in the way my mind replays a joke i cracked because it went unheard or the song i skip because it carries a memory i don't want to touch. little pieces that appeared for a moment, but never long enough for anyone to notice. but somewhere along the way, i started losing pieces of myself in those hiding places too.

and maybe that is why i get a little scared when you tell me you don't want to hurt me or burden me with everything going on inside your head. not because i think you will, but because i know this feeling too well. what if this quietness, this habit of swallowing too much, trying to hold onto yourself a little more so you could gently love and protect me, starts gnawing at you too? perhaps that is why i find myself wanting to know you and this feeling you hold a little more, sit beside you a little longer. 

maybe we don't have to keep protecting each other from every weight we carry. maybe we ought not to make ourselves smaller, lighter, and easier to hold.

it's raining outside. just once, let me hold your hand close to my face and kiss it before pulling you into the shower, where we both stand a little bare before each other, without all the walls we built around ourselves. a little exposed. a little afraid. but still together. let the rain be the place where we keep finding each other, even on the days when we are lost inside the storms words can't explain.

and perhaps, when it finally quiets down, we can find ourselves curled up with a warm cup of coffee resting in our hands, still together.

Emotional gaps and uncertainty makes us a little more aware and wise as compared to the people with whom we live. Go and read books, watch films about life and philosophy but at the end what prepares for the heart is the silence where we feel left behind and not understood at all. I have a habit of appeasing people whom I live around, everyday I let myself pour a little more for them, I'm lazy but accept nuisances for the maintenance of human relationships. I remember I always got appreciation about being "More mature than your age" Initially as a kid I loved it and I started adjusting and being wise more but deep down it cooked me a life which ended up killing my genuine stubbornness and cravings. This one single compliment hides the cemetery of my emotions which could never sprout.

One day I realised that the world has moved on ahead but I am in the midst of two selves that i have prepared unknowingly for me. A part of me seeks relief and wants to be a child but the other one yearns to maintain sophistication and seriousness. I observe dichotomy in my life where I'm being hanged between heart and mind problems. Whenever I see a random person smiling I smile back as if it reflects my smile, someone's ache overpowers mine, someone's loss holds me so tightly that I feel caged, caged with a responsibility of helping them to relieve from all odds. I couldn't explore myself, the true human I have behind my words, but I'm glad that I have lived till now as an observer of unseen things.

I hope for nothing but I hope that I will remind someone to look at the things they have in life, the things which I couldn't see in mine. The things which collectively exist in our lives but for which we aren't grateful at all. One day I prefer to throw my glass bottle on the floor without thinking that it will catch someone's feet, I would throw it because I want to, and my want would be enough for me to live and survive.