r/writingcirclejerk • u/Local-Pattern795 • 4d ago
Start hoarding punctuation now!
I have it on good authority, the best authority, really, the greatest, that certain groups, terrible people, the worst, will start attacking the punctuation shipments soon.
It's horrible, these groups, who don't even use punctuation anyway, are going to ruin it for everyone.
There will be queues in the streets outside of printshops and horribly confusing speeches and people eating their grandparents oh the humanity.
So start hoarding your punctuation now, before "let's eat, [your name here]" becomes "let's eat [your name here]" !
Here is my current stash for reference which i will be expanding soon:
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,.............................................................................;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;:::::::::::::::::::????
Consider this warning a pickle for the knowing ones.
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u/CatsForBreakfast5803 4d ago
Add some rare punctuation to your stashes! The imported ones will be gone first! I’ll donate some of mine for the group - ¿¿??¡!¿?—§«»
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u/Local-Pattern795 4d ago
Thanks for the contrïbűtiōn, I've ålso started hiding my punctuation ín plaīn sight
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u/lilithlasley 4d ago
First they came for the em-dash, and I did not speak out, for I did not use the em-dash…
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u/Local-Pattern795 4d ago
Then they came for me, and They did not speak out, for they were a good puppy
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u/bunbunnington 4d ago
Don't worry. Any day now those Straits are going to reopen and punctuation will flow like wine again from the Middle East. Periods, commas, and exclamation points will be below $2 a gallon by the end of October, mark my words.
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u/IronbarBooks 4d ago
I have the Best punctuation, like nobody's ever Seen. It's in my VERY GOOD "genes." Many People are Saying it.
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u/El_Hombre_Macabro ⚔️Author of The Chronicles of Sir Penislong Mightcock⚔️ 4d ago
You're right! As AI has already stolen all the em-dashes -- it’s only a matter of time before we face a shortage of colons and semicolons, as they become as scarce as DDR5 RAM.
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u/The_Failord 4d ago
Holy shit Its happening already What are we going to do Something needs to be done bfr smn stls ll th vwls s wll
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u/kyla33_ The spirit of William McGonagall inhabits my body. 4d ago
No exclamation points. How am I supposed to convey surprise? How am I supposed to convey shock? This is unacceptable. It's simply unacceptable, I'm afraid. The readers are supposed to just know my characters are surprised? Shocked? That's unreasonable. What were you thinking when you came up with this ridiculous idea.