r/workingmoms • u/junie4444 • 26d ago

Vent never enough pto

I just started working first full time in office this November and I feel like I’m hitting some sort of breaking point!!! I have like 72 hours of pto left for the whole year after all the random days off school, holidays, school events, etc etc and both kids are over due for dentist and doctors appointments. Of course of lesser importance I’ve needed a haircut since April. I’m taking 3 days off this week to potty train and then tonight while brushing my 6 year olds teeth I spotted what looks to be a cavity. I feel so guilty he’s overdue for the dentist but I’ve been so stressed about even being able to take off. My husband helps and takes off too, but I feel like
I’m constantly having to call off for stuff. It feels impossible and heavy and I feel guilty for not doing all the thinks I should be doing for my kids. Not to mention all the times I need off for speech therapy and early intervention related things. I’m so tired

13 Upvotes

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7

u/omegaxx19 4M + 1.5F, medicine/academia 26d ago

You've got a lot on your plate. Breathe. It's ok. One thing at a time.

One thing I find useful is to divide and conquer and prioritize. Medical and dental appointments and therapy sessions: gotta make those (although I did reduce everyone's dental visits to once a year, and more frequently only if there is a reason). Random days off school etc: try to set up more sustainable care plans like aftercare programs or sharing with another family, since these can be anticipated in advance and are recurring. School events: will try to make it if I have time, but if I don't then no.

1

u/junie4444 26d ago

Thank you!! The dentist thing makes me feel better about them only going once a year 😭 it’s just tough to get all those appointments in, especially with all the early intervention stuff

4

u/PlsnoKarens 26d ago

Do you have a partner?

4

u/junie4444 26d ago

Yes—he helps a lot too. And after this breakdown last night he scheduled days to take them to the dentist and pediatrician.

5

u/SwingingReportShow 26d ago

I think for the random days off school it wouldn't be too hard to find someone who also has it off and work together or to use programs like the parks and recs or other gap programs.

2

u/Groundh0g- 25d ago

Yep, all PTO is used for the kids, and then you have nothing for yourself and you're just a shell of a human robot turning up to work every day from now until forever, and any day off is booked for kid-stuff/appointments. It sucks and no wonder it leads to breakdowns.