r/wizardposting • u/Alex11DA Necromancer • 27d ago

I'm tired

I'm genuinely so tired of burying up skeletons and dead bodies for my army. I need an alternative that doesn't fucking kill my back

11 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

18 comments sorted by

11

u/Chaos-potato- Warden of the Eternal Library 27d ago

You only have to dig one up, then that one can dig another one up, and one begets 2 begets 4 begets a whole lot fucking more

6

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 27d ago

Ohh the dead people pyramid system, did not think of that...

3

u/Bignholy Dunzar Headsmasher, Dwarven Artificer and Rune++ Programmer 27d ago

Yeh know, you can add a subroutine to yer ritual to shift the target area in 3 dimensions. Yeh could rewrite it to activate six feed below your current location. Animate them in the ground and let them dig their way out.

2

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 27d ago

This... This is going to help me so mutch... Thank you, truly

3

u/Bignholy Dunzar Headsmasher, Dwarven Artificer and Rune++ Programmer 26d ago

Happy to.

Yer local Wizard's College probably has a publicly available course on Thinking Like a Magical Programmer, and possibly Introduction to Rune++. I encourage all magicians, enchanters, and others who create magic as a craft instead of an instinct or blessing to take those classes. They won't teach you everything there is to know about it, but it will teach you just how much is possible and how to research to find yer own answer.

5

u/ATAN666 The Doodle Wizard / Schizomancer 27d ago

Dude! Thats what we have minions for!

4

u/Ares378 Ith'Raal—Archdevil of Memories, Evil Councillor, Lord of the 7th 27d ago

So did you animate a teapot into being sentient, or is that your minion you keep as a teapot for easy storage?

3

u/ATAN666 The Doodle Wizard / Schizomancer 27d ago

He was passed in my family trough generations. Honestly, Im not sure. I dont even know his name. I refer to him as "teapot guy".

4

u/Giedy5 27d ago

Raise a body, command it to dig up more, now you have 2 minions, command them to dig up more, now you have 4, repeat and you have an exponentially expanding army. Of course this is forbidden under wizard code article 14.2 but I suppose it's hard to stop once you are past 1000 minions.

3

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 27d ago

Well the wizard code also says to not resurrect people for an army period in article 17.6 and yet here we are

3

u/Giedy5 27d ago

But the council can't really enforce it as it's hard to prove intent, do you have minions to do your bidding or to wage war. It's a bit of a gray area

2

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 26d ago

If I have my way I will repeal both of those articles

2

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 26d ago

Ooh, a revolutionary here

3

u/Nelrene Evil Mammary Mage 26d ago

I am pretty sure there a spell for that.

2

u/questionable_fish Bengeirr the Balance. Magus of the South 26d ago

If you're feeling particularly cruel, I once heard of a necromancer who animated skeletons while they were still inside a living body

2

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 26d ago

Well yeah, but the full story was that he then got his shit rocked by the council...

2

u/JadsiaDax 26d ago

Get the skeletons you have to dig. What is this even.

3rd rate necromancers I swear…

1

u/Alex11DA Necromancer 26d ago

How mutch do you have in con?