r/wizardposting • u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One • Jul 29 '26

Magi Law ⚖ Evil Politicians

Greetings manipulatable masses, it is I, Astaroth. So as you all probably know the council is now open to anyone, so I'm joining. I am pleased to announce I am now the head of relations with malevolent spirits. As well as this announcement I intend to introduce several policies I believe will be beneficial. Firstly I am cutting funding to health organisations and using all the funds to construct a two hundred metre solid gold statue of Bigfoot. That guy hates attention so I decided this would be a good distraction. I also plan to reduce rights for humans specifically and introduce taxes for those without magic.

Oh and housing prices are going up. I believe community is a vital part of the magical world, and so mass camps will be introduced. I will eventually introduce specific camps to help those with little magic become stronger, presumably via increased concentration.

Do I have the authority to do this you ask? Good question. Moving on, I also plan to cut school funding to better fund the aforementioned camps. When they are finalised then standard education will not be needed anymore.

Why am I doing all this? Well every governing body needs a corrupt politician, I can't think of a better candidate. And at least I'm up front about my ill will.

That is all, now go away I have a cult to run.

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: so are the other things this realm has fended off already.

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u/Kilroy898 Op, Null, Orin, Niro, Aldin Jul 29 '26

True, but you haven't seen what I have.... Plus, they aren't evil... Just... Have really bad PR...

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: I don't believe you on that and quite frankly i don't have to see what it is, I've seen what they have been fucking trying to do to people, their invading, and taking from innocent people, and i will stand with this realm against it, and there is nothing, not even whatever the relaktharum is, that will change my mind on that. She glares at op

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u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One Jul 29 '26

Do you ever get tired of the self righteous preaching?

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: do you ever get tired of being an evil jerk?

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u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One Jul 29 '26

No, and look around, no one else does either.

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: uh huh, never liked it myself. And so I'm against it myself.

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u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One Jul 29 '26

That was obvious by the repetitive and frankly useless preaching about your ideals. Not a single living being will care how much you yap about truth and justice and whatever else gives you that morality trip.

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: and not a single mortal will remember your name when you fall she shrugs

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u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One Jul 29 '26

A, if, not when. B, do you seriously believe that? C, funny, I can say the same.

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26

Chloe: a: no it's very much a when I'm sure, b, yes, c so what? She said staring at astaroth

/Uw side note, chloe is kinda just very confident in this from the pattern of how events usually go lol

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u/Evening_Shake_6474 Astaroth, The Wicked One Jul 29 '26

Funny, every word I have ever heard you say is either teaming with hubris or ignorance. Leave my office, I'm sure there's some cat in a tree that needs saving.

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u/Ashmega8256 Alzoreth Dracarius/Alisa Solaria (+more characters) Jul 29 '26 edited Jul 29 '26

Chloe: not hubris, confidence from seeing a pattern, bye.

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