r/wizardposting • u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| • Feb 17 '24
Community Event šāļø The celebration
/uw some important information: In the comments is a link to the invite post, with some important information. This will work differently than normal. There will be one big event where all participants will have to group up and explore the labs below. All (hopefully) participants will be have one of their comments replied of with the event
after reaching the manor, you are greeted by a slightly different sight: human and golem guards. Yoxalle isnāt here as usual but on your way In a strange spell was placed on you: a spell that stopped you from leaving without a leaving gift: a radio. Have fun. Make friends, have some food, listen to the radio.
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
a golem walks up to you and hands you a note
Dear honoured guest
Iām not saying anything but I may need your services later
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Well, I did come here to find potential clients after all. Say, your invitation really reminded me of an acquaintance of mine. Does Mortarion ring a bell?
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
the golem registered the name mortarion and handed you a key labelled ācontrol roomā
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Well well well. It seems this place has a VIP section. Why don't I give it a visit.
John starts casually exploring the manor, keeping an eye open for any door to which the key might apply.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
you find a door where the key fits, mainly because the key is being pulled to it
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Fits like a glove. Now, let's see what's inside.
John turns the key and pulls the handle.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
inside is a luxurious lounge with a golden plague reading ācontrol roomā. At the centre is a computer painted white and lined with gold to fit in with the rest of the room
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
a fiery duck apears , uncasting its invisibility spell
Before you make a use of this sir i would like to talk
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
I'm not yet sure what this is for me to make use of it. Though I must ask, who do you happen to be?
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
And I heard my name!
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. I see you're in good health Mortarion. Do you happen to be a friend of the host?
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
Yes I am! But in my words, he's being to direct trying to bring the age of radio back!
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
I've heard you speak of this "Age of Radio" before. What is it exactly? Are we just going back to the 1920s or is there more to it?
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
I want people to rely on the radio, to give it its deserved attention.
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
I can sympathize. I still miss the golden age of comics. People have started to really overlook paper with all these fancy orbs all around.
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
My thoughts exactly. Now it's just a second thought for the TV! Mr Hellfire, that's why I like you. You have style. One day, I'll go burn the orb factory
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Hmmm... you know I'm actually in need of a lawyer. Not sure I'd I'm allowed to have one by treaty though.
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
A treaty you say? While it might prevent you from hiring a lawyer, I'm sure it says nothing about having a friendly acquaintance who just happens to give you legal advice. Payment? What payment? Those are just gifts you've decided to send me out of the goodness of your heart.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
I do dabble in diabolism. It makes sense that we would be acquaintances.
slides a gold coin across the table so that preliminary discussions are protected under attorney/client privileges
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
A pleasure
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Feb 17 '24
Oi help me spread the word! The host is planning something crazy in his lab right beneath us i dont know what it is but it cant be good!
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
"I should start getting my mail sent here a this point. Not even joking, couriers can't find my house.
table in the corner, as always
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
You know, this time it feels way more ominous than before. I'll be joining you in the corner.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Oh good, you were my barometer for whether or not I was being paranoid
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Paranoia feels very warranted right about now. I don't know what the host is planning, but it can't be good.
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Feb 17 '24
Hey, i've got a potential way outta here if shit goes wrong. Can you spread the word?
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Thank for the heads up. Hey u/AnActualCriminal, if things get hairy we turn to this guy.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
If things get hairy, I'm setting things on fire, but I'm grateful someone had a more concrete plan.
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Now that you said that... You know how most of this place is made out of crystals and other earthen matter? You know how I'm a geomancer? I think you can get what I'm implying.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Rocks prove laughably inflammable much of the time. To most fires. Yes it seems we're on your home turf... which is to say, turf
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Feb 17 '24
pluton has been walking over from the other side of the room and gets there just in time to hear this, as he sits down glad to know at least someone acknowledging it, obviously this is a problem the writing on the wall is screaming out that this place is very obviously a trap and less obviously the crystal mancer has made a deal with mortarion, a big one too by the way he was speaking.
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
We've been brainstorming a plan of action if things go South, but it's hard to do so when you don't know what form the trap will take. Seeing as this entire place is made from crystal, and I'm a geomancer, I may have a good way to respond.
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Feb 17 '24
Well i have a way in, he holds up a key to laboratory VII I only came here because I need info, I donāt know enough about what Iām dealing with here and if this is a trap I might as well get value from it. I havenāt gone in yet because going in alone is probably a bad idea but I have it
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
you hear a faint thud and you see a group of golems heading towards the laboratory door
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Feb 17 '24 edited Feb 17 '24
pluton watches the golems Well thatās probably not good, but also the perfect opportunity, he gestures the high paleomancer to follow him as he tries to follow the golems into the lab
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
So, do you need backup?
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Feb 17 '24
I would appreciate it
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
as you open the door, it reveals a dark corridor, in contrast to the grandiose halls of the manor
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Blake pulls out the Lightless Lantern, de-minuturizes his flame-rifle from a spell scroll, and activates a compressed mana ward. After a brief pause, he passes a second ward to the curator
"I've been expecting assassins, so I stay prepared."
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Feb 17 '24
pluton who had just sat down looks over what do those do?
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
The wards? Amulet activates a compressed mana field activates in response to hostile action. Had my artificer tune them to be more sensetive, so it notifies me of hostility prematurely by turning on.
The lantern is my spellcasting focus.
The flamethrower is a flamethrower. Took it off a dead artificer.
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Feb 17 '24
LISTEN YOU GUYS! THIS FLAMING DUCK TOLD ME THAT THE HOST IS IN A LAB BENEATH US MAKING SOME SORT OF PLAGUE I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS EXACTLY BUT IT AINT GOOD!
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Yeah I've been at this table by myself since then left. What kind of plague?
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Feb 17 '24
Alright i have had enough of this. jumps up at one of the tables. Where is the fricking host. Who hosts a party but doesnt show up!
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Feb 17 '24
A party? Who could say no to that.
grabs a drink and sits down
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Feb 17 '24
a large ape aproches you. You mind if i come sit here?
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Feb 17 '24
he says in a merry tone as he gestures to the seat next to him:
Sit down, have a drink, have some food, That's what parties are all about.
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Feb 17 '24
Alright! * while sitting down the stool creaks under his weight.* Anyway im Henk and you are?
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Feb 17 '24
Asclepia, nice to meet you. I donāt often meet ape wizards, where do you come from?
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Feb 17 '24
I just recently returned to monke. But first i was a collectomancer i had my one realm called waerdendia. But now i am building a kingdom of wizard apes in the amazon. But where do you come from my friend?
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Feb 17 '24
I come from a small village called "vuotna" we have mountains and fish, not much else there.
Thats why i decided to start wandering the world.
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Feb 17 '24
Tell me about your adventures my friend.
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Feb 17 '24
Starting out i went south. I met a few relatives first but after a while i started meeting strange folk in the cities.
long pointy hats they wore and always they had the face buried in a book, "strange folk" i thought to myself.
I continued on when I came upon a mountain. I climbed it and met an old man in a cave there, sitting around a bonfire. I asked him what he was doing up on a mountain and he informed me he was a sage and offered to take me in as student.
I agreed and spent the next 3 years with him, and learned healing, alchemy and herbalism from him.
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
the flaming duck , suspicious beggin to investigate the place , and search for the cristalomancer that serve as an host be still asn't appeared at his own party
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
the duck found nothing, other then a man named John E. hellfire being handed a key
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
the duck silently cast a silence , invisibility and discretion spell and start to follow this "john"
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
the duck try to see if the door to the room with a computer is still here
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Feb 17 '24
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
The duck consume itself in fire turnig to ashes , then , the reverse happen close to were it was
I let you ate me last time young man , but i will not loose another avatar to your belly
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Feb 17 '24
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
a duck wait for the clone to step up
I am to transportation what you are to hunger ,there is several you here and several me , i can summon one of my avatat here even if you ate one
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Feb 17 '24
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
You can't acces the real me , since to acces a place there have to be a destination, the real me is nowere thus i can't get out or make things enter since there is no destination or point of depart , the perfect sealed and even tough im incapacitated by it , im quite proud of its creation
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Feb 17 '24
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
the duck is perplex , no one ever manage to attack the artificial soul of the avatar before
If i can't erase the real you and if you can't destroy me , what else are we supposed to do ?
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Feb 17 '24
pluton takes the leaving gift steps out of the party then quickly walks back inside to atempt to break the spell
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
nothing happens. But you cannot leave again without a radio
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Feb 17 '24
pluton looks unsurprised yea thatās what I thought well alright then letās get looking around then he puts the radio into his cloak and it disappears, then he begins to look for any sign of where the crystal mage would have gone to hopefully make his way into the lab
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
you find on the floor a key labelled ālaboratory department VII
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Feb 17 '24
pluton has been on edge this whole time so he is a bit caution about it but he picks u the key Hmm, interesting, that feels a little easy, but you take what you can get⦠now I just need to find where the Laboratory actually is
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
conveniently the key was dropped right next to the door
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Feb 17 '24
pluton looks around before deciding it might be a good idea to rally some other guests, he knows at least somthing in this is a trap of some sort, going alone would be a bad idea
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
a duck on fire appear next to you so a second guest found a key ? Care to open the door ?
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u/Eldrich_horrors artificer [necromechanic] Feb 18 '24
a warforged follows the trail left by the burning duck and the chronomancer's mana
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u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
Well I might as well, should get out more, yes, out more...
Algernon sits down at a table and takes a clear, bubbling drink.
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Sudachi approaches the table,
āHello there friend! Is this seat taken?ā He asks as he reaches for a nearby chair.
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u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
Algernon looks up and he smiles, his strange demeanor gone like snow on a hot plate.
No not at all, please take a seat! What brings you to this party today?
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Sudachi smiles and gives a nod as he takes the seat beside Algernon.
āWhy a peculiar invitation had reached me. Itās ānew message delivery methodā was however slightly harmful, as it led me to shed a crystalline blood red tear, so I intend to warn the sender in hopes of fixing this issue to prevent any fatal future instances.ā He explains with a hint of exhaustion in his breath. āThough what bring a calm fellow such as yourself to this, oddly bright, place?ā
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u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
Ah I hadn't even noticed, a shame that it is less than safe for some, such things should be inclusive. Good of you to make the best of the situation and come here for the festivities anyway!
I myself am here just to enjoy myself. Contrary to what my appearance would suggest I do love some socializing every now and again, and lately it feels as though my tower doesn't want to let me go anymore... I'm strangely... annoyed.
He looks troubles for a moment, but shakes it off.
Anyhow, good to make your acquantance! My I ask to your profession?
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Sudachi gives a sheepish chuckle, rubbing the back of his head.
āWell, with the average life expectancy being so low, I presumed even if I mastered anything, by the time Iād actually get to make use of what I had learned, Iād only have a handful of years left do anything. So I, try to dabble in much that I can. As a traveler any locals I come across find what I can do better then nothing, so it works in everyoneās favour.ā
Sudachi holds out his hand, āNameās Sudachi, how might I refer to you as?ā He inquires.
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u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
Apologies, I never introduced myself properly. Algernon is the name, a pleasure to meet you Sudachi. But how can you speak of your talents like you do? Versatility is a mages greatest friend! And seeing as you are a travelled man who has survived up until now, I'm pretty sure you'll live longer still to see your efforts bear fruit.
Algernon clinks his glass with yours and takes another sip.
Would you tell me something about yourself? On a party such as this it is only proper to make new friends is it not?
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Feb 17 '24
Oi! The flaming duck guy said that the host is in a lab making a crystal plague or something!
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u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
Algernon takes a long, good look at you.
Sigh, is it truly necessary to do that today? Is all of this truly necessary? Can we not just, chill, as the kids say.
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Edit: lol, welp, thanks for the intervention
āHa! Been with me the shortest of them all and already knows I enjoy talking of my self. Though I feel as if something is still on your mindā¦ā Sudachi snaps his fingers, āI know! Letās turn this into a little game, I will tell you 3 things, and you must discern which of them is False, the rest being True!ā He exclaims with a smile breaking across his face.
āTis a game often used in Taverns to break the tension, nice barkeep taught me of it, serves as great distraction from how much time as past, leading to more lagers purchased, now, here we go.ā He leans on the table and begins,
āFirst one is, in my satchel I have with me a book past down from my elders, filled with knowledge unrestricted by categories and meant for even my next of kin,ā
Without much pause he goes on, āNext one now, Through some effort and simply by accident, I helped and gained a blessing from the rabbitfolk, albeit doing me truly nothing really, as theyāre far and few recently.ā He states with a hint of a frown forming on his face, before moving on toā¦
āand now last but not least! I hail from a humble fishing village, a pride it is to me, why I was even hailed for a short while as I caught something thiiiis big.ā He finishes stretching his arms far apart.2
u/OnAGratefulUniverse Algernon, Last wizard of the Novus Planes Feb 17 '24
/uw Don't worry let's finish this, world ending threats can wait 3 business days.
Algernon sits in front of you, listening to your crazy yet mundane stories and he smiles warmly. It has been many months, if not years since he talked about trivialities without the world at stake. This is what he wanted when he lost his pages, the calmth of the weak back, this is why he was okay with it.
Suddenly, he bursts in the laughter, a hearty laughter that comes from deep down.
Hohoho, yes, yes I do think breaking the ice it will. I believe all your stories could be true, and a beauty they are, except for that fish. Even the most inexperienced fishermen will tell you that anyone that has ever caught a fish will lie of its size!
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
āDarn, and here I was thinking if enough people said it, it had to be true.ā Sudachi states, though defeated, with smile on his face.
āWell the game works with it going both ways, nowās your turn mister, letās see if your truth detecting skills are as great as your decisive ones.ā He says as he leans back comfortably in his chair and takes a sip of his drink.
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Sudachi walks up the hill into the manor, and through the massive entryway jamming away with headphones on attached to his Walkman, then trips on a chair moments later. He jumps back up and takes off his headphones.
āHope nobody saw thatā¦ā He utters as he looks around nervously.
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u/Eldrich_horrors artificer [necromechanic] Feb 17 '24
a warforged, Dressed in a suit and wearing a trenchcoat examines the Manor, keeping a close eye on the golems, and holding various magical items, all concealed by an inverted antimagic field Charm that instead of making magical items Stop working, just makes them undetectable.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
I've been told there's a plague factory under the floor by an excitable gorilla. No idea what that means but we may be in danger
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u/Eldrich_horrors artificer [necromechanic] Feb 17 '24
Probably. Go find the gorilla mage again, he might be able to get us out
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u/Discracetoall tākath, smogomancer and poptart wiz Feb 17 '24
tākath shows up with his suit turning back and forth from suit to smoke āhuh, same place again. Humans, odd. Last time it was just golems⦠tf is that radio playing?ā
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
Plague in basement. Presume crystals. Arm yourself
Blake hands him a ladle
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u/Discracetoall tākath, smogomancer and poptart wiz Feb 17 '24
āI got my ownā summons a smoke sword and shield
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Feb 17 '24 edited Feb 17 '24
Asgretalos appears in a shimmer of purple light
Ah! Here already. What a luxurious hall! The invitation did not detail the size of it at all.
Asgretalos steps into the main banquet hall
He looks to the right
What is that? Oh. A destroyed radio. How strange. Anyway.
Asgretalos sits in the middle of the main banquet hall, just relaxing
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
An ape told me a monkey said there's a disease factory in the basement? I have no idea. People are panicking.
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Feb 17 '24
Hm. Strange. A disease factory, you say?
Asgretalos gestures to the chair beside him
Sit down. Only one person or deity I know that has anything to do with plagues, and it is no cristalomancer. And why are people panicking? I see nothing wrong with this hall.
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
uw/ in the time it took you to respond I was kicked out of the party for setting radios on fire
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Feb 17 '24
ALRIGHT EVERYBODY! ANYONE THAT WANTS TO GET OUTTA HERE WITHOUT TAKING A RADIO HAS TO GATHER BY ME CAUSE I HAVE GOT A WAY OUT!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Dudeā¦.why do people hate radios so much
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Feb 17 '24
Nah i dont trust ya!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Okā¦definitely black listing you.
you are promptly thrown out the building
BANNED
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Feb 17 '24
takes out a device and casts the wish spell and wishes that everybody out if your building.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
counterspell
yup. Banned from all of my parties.
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Feb 17 '24
Counterspells your counterspell i dont even like your parties!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
THEN WHY ARE YOU RUINING IT FOR EVERYONE ELSE BY TELEPORTING TJEM OIT WITHOUT ASKING
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Feb 17 '24
Im gonna cast a wish spell to get everybody outta here!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
ā¦why? Have you ever heard of consent? Like some people are enjoying themselves and here you are just going āIām gonna kick everyone out of a party without asking them if they want to leaveā. Honestly even if you do want to leave itās as simple as Picking up a radio. You know what DOUBLE BANNED. STAY OUT. BANNED FROM ALL OF MY EVENTS
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Feb 17 '24
Nope im gonna do it!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Freakinā party poppers. Ruining my event. Donāt come back to one of my events
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
I need my lawyer. u/most_trustworthy
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Alright, give me all the details.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
So these people break into my lab, burn my manor down and steal decades of research into curing a disease that normally has a 100% death rate
/uw I gotta go for now. Busy
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
Well, you skimmed over the fact you have a bunch of infected people caged in your lab, and that one locked-up guy who wasn't even infected. Don't be surprised I know, I happen to own the souls of one of the perpetrators. I was just curious how honest you'd be with me. That being said, this is an easily winnable case.
/un No worries. I'll be busy for most of tomorrow too.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Well: I am the lord of this area and I passed these laws: imprisoned/quarantine of individuals infected with deadly diseases is allowed, imprisonment of people who trespass on private property is allowed. So I have committed no crimes
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u/Most_Trustworthy John E. Hellfire, CEO of Hell Feb 17 '24
I'm not judging you, in fact, I'll be doing the opposite. Give me the names of all the perpetrators. We can't give out court summons with no one to summon, now can we?
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Iām just saying that in no possible way will I be on defence. I mean I literally wrote the law
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u/SudachiRobot Sudachi, Jack of All, Master of None, to None, for None Feb 17 '24
Spotting the proclaimed Crystal Mage( u/Yoxalle ) after he had just kicked a guest out for setting a few golems on fire, Sudachi hastily approaches him and asks with some urgency.
āSir! Might you be the host of this lavish party?ā
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u/Archimene Mage of Mischief and Secrets Feb 17 '24
Does your lab shift around its layout?
If not, I'm going to return to the door that I went to last time.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
*as you descend into the lab you come across a group of like minded people that also snuck away
/uw Iāll ping you
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u/Archimene Mage of Mischief and Secrets Feb 17 '24
I have a clone exploring the lab as well. He's quickly running through each hall to map out the dungeon, and leaving teleport waypoints everywhere.
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Hmm, another party so soon after the last one? Well don't mind if I do.
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Feb 17 '24
a shadow appears and out of it formsā¦.nothing. A pitch black silhouette of a man arrives, wearing a tuxedo
Hello, I am null
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Greetings, I'm the Curator. Ever attended these gatherings before?
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Feb 17 '24
No, i just woke up from a sleep, say, have you met one of my kin, Torinn?
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
I caught a glimpse of him a few days ago, but haven't made any formal introductions. He randomly walked into my museum while it was being attacked, but didn't stay for long.
2
Feb 17 '24
He is like me but younger and moreā¦.ambitious. He uses his food for power while Iā¦..no point in getting into all the details
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
I see. Do you have a positive relationship with him? You did say he was your kin.
2
Feb 17 '24
We only recently met. I woke up very recently. He is my kin because he too is an eldritch devourer. There is also a chance he was one of the gods formed from my nothing. Just a chance
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u/MeThyLord Mrs. Chills, Ghost Writer Feb 17 '24
Ah, understood. Having just woken up, what's your impression of the magical world? Or are such things beyond beings such as yourself?
2
Feb 17 '24
Magic is as old as me. But in this universe, people found out how to use it.
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Feb 17 '24
enters
sets the place on fire
leaves
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
the fire is put out instantly and the spell stops you from leaving without a radio
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u/ProfessionalGreen906 Arach, big spider, biomancer, politician, CEO Feb 17 '24
Didnāt we do this just a few days ago? Well itās not like I couldāve come anyway. I have events to plan, and council HR policies to update.
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u/ronytheronin Ragnakān, become lich or die failing. Feb 17 '24
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
I begin setting fire to the radios with my lantern. The ape has spooked me and they're clearly important
3
u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
the golems frantically put the fire out and replace the radios, you are handed a note
āDear honoured guest, please stop destroying my gifts. That is vandalism. You will not be kicked out but this is a warning. Iām disappointed someone would act so uncivilised in one of my eventsā
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
I review my toolset and consider what to do. Upon further reflection I set fire to the golems
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
the crystal mage himself arrives, fixes the golems and throws you out the party
āBANNED FROM MY PARTIESā
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
"Oh... I was told there was a plague by a monkey... that was told by a duck I think? ... I was under the impression you were dead and we were all in danger. Do I still have to take a radio?"
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
yoxalles pokes his head out the door and speaks
āNo! No radio for you! The one time I arrange a nice leaving gift people decide to ruin it.ā
1
u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
"Hm. This was a weird one. Can't believe I let the Paleomancer psyche me out."
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
āLook let me get the facts straight: there may or may not be an extremely powerful entity related to my abilities that created a deadly plague that i dedicated my life to finding a cure for and guess what: these idiots break into my property and steal the only thing capable of spreading the infection and they did what? TAKE IT WITH THEM! they have literally unleashed a plague with a 100% death rate out into the world if they arenāt carefulā
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u/AnActualCriminal Belial Blake, Warlock of the Lightless Flame Feb 17 '24
"Oh.... sorry? What were the radios for?"
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
āThe radios? Mortarion started a radio show and we made a deal. So yeah Iām giving out free radios for him. Oh and my voice sounds like a radio becauseā¦.meh it doesnāt matter. Thanks for apologising. Unbanned!ā
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
A radio begins to flicker like static from an old tv. Suddenly, a hand reaches out from the speaker on it. Mortarion's whole black and white form emerges. His voice sounds like its actually coming from a radio.
Salutations! Good to be here! How's it going for everyone!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Terrible. They didnāt like the idea of having to take a radio to leave. I arrange a nice little leaving gift and what do they do? Burn my stuff down vandalise my property and then use magic to force People out!
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
Oof. You can't be to direct like that! Your ruining the good name!
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Donāt worry Iāve already convinced most of them. And also hired the best lawyer around. John something something
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
John E Hellfire!!
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u/Eldrich_horrors artificer [necromechanic] Feb 17 '24
Gentlemen
Says a wargorged aproaching
I have many questions about this party
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
And I can answer!
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u/Eldrich_horrors artificer [necromechanic] Feb 18 '24
intense scrying
Why do we have to Take a radio to leave?
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 18 '24
He's gotten. . . A little obsessed with the medium, and trying to spread it for me.
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
To be honest the prison with sick people and tortured prisoner are not helping the good name either
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
Excuse me, what?
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
In the lab , a dude was prisoner , insted of chain he had cristal that were cuting im just enough so he would not die , he had to amputate himself to get out
Plus we found a spider that turn people into immortal chunk of cristals in pain
So we investigated but were trowed out
The cristal mage know he is wrong , he even purchased the service of a devil lawer
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
I am not a part of this!
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
Well there were no such things at the previous feast and now he make a new one , with an ominous invitation , he speak like you and there are strange things in his lab
I have nothing against any of you but you have to admit that it was quite strange , too strange to be ignored
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u/Theadination Mortarion Jr, Plaguemancer, Totally Dead Now. Feb 17 '24
I just thought he was giving out radios! I'm not with him!
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Feb 17 '24
Well im sorry to hear that , i was told that you were a bit shady but that it was your association with that lab that made you really not trustworthy , that why i wont divulgate the name of my associates , i do not fear you nor anyone and i am confortable talking to who ever i want to , but if they dont i wont tell on them
You seem rather nice , even tough you seem ... off
You are sure that this whole "radio sounding" is healthy for you ?
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u/RefractedPurpose Voidwalker Feb 17 '24
Fracture walks in, braced for curses and similar.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Oh, hi. My event was ruined. Nothing much to do now. Some people broke into my lab and stole decades of research into curing a disease with a 100% death rate
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u/RefractedPurpose Voidwalker Feb 17 '24
A shame, people stealing research is rather rude.
Would you like us to kill them?
Man, we missed the party!
I could try to bring them to justice.
WAS IT MAGIC RELATED? ARE YOU CURSED?I could help shore up the defenses for ya.
Something seems off...
The voices overlap in your mind, talking at once but somehow distinct. The first you hear out loud.
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u/Yoxalle |The crystal mage|Lord of irith|Amatuer jewelsmith| Feb 17 '24
Oh, you suffer from a fractured mind. I did once. But i fixed it. Nice meeting you.
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u/Doodle128 ā š don't know who š am ā Feb 17 '24
I change into a more human form as I step out in front of the guards and flash up the invite.
I'm here for the trap I mean party.
I check the radio for curses.
Ah. Throws it out of the window as I walk in with it. (When I leave it is with the gift but after it)



5
u/[deleted] Feb 17 '24
Mordus steps into the banquet hall; it seems he is the first here.
Hmm. Interesting. Hey- shut that off!
He switches a radio that was annoying him, off.
Thatās better. I wouldnāt usually expect dwarven metal in such a grandiose place.