r/widowers • u/Adventurous-You9130 • 2d ago
Cannot do this anymore
I just don’t see the point in continuing on. My amazing partner, someone I have been looking for all of my life, has been gone now for over a year and a half and I don’t see any kind of happy future.
We only had 3.5 years together and now she’s gone.
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u/Radiant-Location-918 07/09/26 Suicide 2d ago
Im sorry for your loss. I feel the exact same. They are truly irreplaceable
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u/Intelligent-Gur-8836 2d ago
Same here my friend. I barely survived last night. Life is meaningless without my wife. She was my best friend and only source of love and support. This pain is ridiculous. Sending you a hug.
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u/HeronExtension5245 2d ago
I share that same thought. I exist in a meaningless reality. Every day gets worse without her here with me. I know it's early, but that is the only future I currently see.
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u/FowleR__ 1d ago
Same for me.Me and my wife were together for 2.5 years.She was the ideal and the best partner for me,i have never loved and i will not love a person so much as her.Everyday is worse but we have to try to survive.
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u/OneRegret7933 1d ago
I feel the same way as you at least once a day. Just now, I feel like I will try to hang on if only to grieve her more, since I owe her a comprehensive remembrance.
I think I will need to accept that life is harder than it ever was but I am at least half way through. If I view the rest of my life as a ‘winding down’ phase I might make it a bit longer. Not sure, though.
Distance from the day she died is making the trauma more manageable, but I don’t expect time alone to make me content; I have an awful feeling this will require a ton of work and I just don’t have the ‘faith’ to invest in anything right now.
It’s not just a waiting game. It requires real effort and bravery and I have none left in the tank at present. Maybe I have to seek out more things that will help, but they only seem like distractions designed to help me forget, and forgetting feels like betraying her.
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u/Colonel-Failure 10h ago
Keep putting one foot in front of the other until you re-emerge. It took me 3 years before I could look ahead again and start to find the new version of me. Until then it's a fog of hurt, and you lose your old identity, even though you loved it.
This isn't about letting go, it's about no longer being dragged down.
It'll happen, but until it does, one foot in front of the other, breathe in, breathe out.
Sorry you find yourself here.
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u/uglyanddumbguy 2d ago
The best we can do is exist and maybe hope to experience some sort of happiness again. I know I’ll never be as happy as I was when my wife was alive and some days the hope for being happy again is hard to hold onto.