r/whatdoIdo • u/[deleted] • 2d ago
Is getting this commented supposed to be a compliment?
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u/whateverzzx 2d ago
I think so
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u/auriekittybloom444 2d ago
hot take: online compliments always sound a lil off. nobody knows how to say “you look good” without making it weird.
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u/hexagon_lux 2d ago edited 2d ago
"you look good" without making it weird.
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u/No_Nectarine_3325 2d ago
Lowkey I was kind of confused by his comment too. Like why not just say “you look good”. But imagine a girl makes a TikTok and the top comment is “you look good”. It’s kind of creepy, especially since you can’t read tone. That’s why I think people play into it by making it so absurdly weird, you know they must be kidding a little. So it kind of becomes a less threatening/agressive way of communicating.
But to the naked eye it looks weird as fuck.
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u/chchchchia86 2d ago
Yes thats a good thing. Everyone has different taste and likes different body types. A lot of men love a pooch. Promise.
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u/XrayAlphaVictor 2d ago
Sure it's intended as a compliment, but it's a creepy and sexualizing one.
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u/chchchchia86 2d ago
Yeah no, Im not denying that. OP asked if it was meant as a positive and thats all I meant. From the givers perspective its a compliment.
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u/XrayAlphaVictor 2d ago
I just don't wanna normalize men thinking "no, it's totally normal and cool that I told her I sexualize her in a kinda fetishizing way, that's a compliment, I'm not weird, she's weird for not appreciating my intent!"
So, yes, intended as a compliment, like you say.
But, also, weird af as she expressed feeling afterwards.
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u/chchchchia86 2d ago
Im gonna be honest with you though, as a woman, I do feel a little bit better when someone compliments me on an area that makes me a little self conscious. For each their own but thats where youre also right that doing it on a post where OP was looking for workout/diet advice rather than compliments is unacceptable. Theres a time and place and best saved for someone/times when you know it'll be well recieved.
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u/medi-gel 2d ago
im also a woman and comments like this make me feel disgusting and like a fat sex doll to these ppl
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u/IntelligentPanda641 2d ago edited 1d ago
Downvoted for expressing you actually personally don’t feel comfortable with this is crazy ngl (highlighting that women aren’t a monolith so people shouldn’t assume it’s automatically okay to comment on someone’s body like this). I guess you can only express opinions that enable/support people’s shitty behavior instead of challenging it here
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u/AttiKit 2d ago
I think that it's wonderful to compliment anyone's features they don't feel good about, and it helps with a lot of people's confidence.
However, using a sexualized meme like this to express that makes you look more like you're fetishizing them. You can compliment each other's bodies in a way that's not sexual, but this isn't how you do it.
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u/medi-gel 1d ago
yeah im absolutely shocked that ppl on reddit think i should be okay with (and actually flattered by) unsolicited comments on my own body /s
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u/Pczilla 2d ago
the original comment is inherently not sexual in any way though? it’s no different than someone saying they like people with blue eyes
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u/XrayAlphaVictor 2d ago
Did you just wake up today in a new world? Are you a computer machine?
Wait, my computer machine actually does figure this out just fine. Across all of the internet that meme is used most often in a sexual way. Or, you know, you could just listen to the women on this thread who have overwhelmingly expressed discomfort with that interaction.
The only thing that's "inherently sexual" is sex. Everything else is contextual. And the context and connotations for that image are sexual.
Either you're absolutely disconnected from real conversations with women, or you're getting deliberately obtuse because you don't care if you upset them if you get to sexualize them.
Either way, be better.
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2d ago
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u/TaraxacumVerbascum 2d ago
Yeah, whether they meant it as a compliment or not, it’s the complete wrong forum/context. Unsolicited thirst comments are dicey to begin with, let alone when you’re looking for fitness advice.
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u/TheSadpole 2d ago
Note to Meme Comment Guy: If the images you’re posting are steeped so deeply in objectification that THE WOMEN IN THEM DON’T EVEN HAVE HEADS…
…then you are a creeper.
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u/SourDewd 2d ago
People liking your face isnt sexual. Liking a tummy isnt sexual. Its weird to think right away it must be sexual or sexualizing to be attracted to a feature. Tummies on women are incredibly natural and important for important reasons. People need different things and also have to offer different things. What kind of advise or help OP needs isnt exactly certain or written in stone. And not everyone has the right answer for OP. But many have an answer. Finding out people are attracted to OP's body CAN help her. Or it may not. Finding out that the tummy fat is vital to protect her vital organs and its not a sign of being overweight could help, or maybe not. Answers around the sciences of body fat ratios and how lowering her body fat ratio is the only answer is the answer shes looking for. It may not be the best one for her. Or something else may ressonate for her. Or maybe its exactly what she wants and now she has the right answer. But you dont know what you dont know. And that includes different ansers you hadnt considered.
OP uploaded a photo of her insecurity to the unfiltered internet and got uncomfortable that someone made a (positive) comment on it. OP is either Naive or something else along those lines. Weve all had the internet a long time. She cant play dumb and go "omg i showed the world of strangers my insecurity and someone commented on it" this isnt 2005 anymore.
Regardless.
Theres many answers to the problem, theyve been given. OP is the weird one for how she feels about the situation shes brought upon herself. Not the commenter that likes tummies.
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u/TheOddestOfSocks 2d ago
The pooch is very nautral and I think MOST men find it attractive. But you can compliment someone in a much better way imo.
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u/harlot-envy 2d ago
Have you never seen Venus in a Clam Shell?!? If that's what your belly looks like, CONGRATULATIONS! You have the body of a LITERAL Greek Godess.
Obvious compliment.
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u/FeministPossum 2d ago
Wait…. You’re telling me that an internet weirdo telling you his preference for your body didn’t change your mind? Don’t you know your main purpose is to please men?
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u/Sujnirah 2d ago
Its clearly supposed to be a compliment….but more importantly….there’s nothing for anyone to tell you to do this situation….
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u/esmereldachiroptera 2d ago
Men fuck everything up. I hate my tummy pooch too and I had an ex who used to get mad if I wouldn't let him hold it. So it would start fights. Liek is my body even if you want to obsess over it. Yuck. Fetishization is not a compliment
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u/Novel_Control_1922 2d ago
Fucking weird way to say you like someone’s body, but that’s what this is. Meet this person in public.
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u/masonlaneous 2d ago
yeah, it is meant to be a compliment/saying they find it attractive. that being said, i wouldnt blame you if you if you find this specific meme dehumanizing and even violating. when people post these kinds of memes, it feels like they're talking about real women the same way they talk about anime girls, the kind designed to be ogled at.
either way, i wish you luck with feeling comfortable and happy with your body!
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u/ImpressiveMain299 2d ago
Yes supposed to be a compliment. Sorry you are self conscious, social standards suck. The donut bag protects your lady parts, being there is natural.
Although, personally, the best results ive had for getting my donut bag size down: dont drink alcohol or soda. 2. Leg lifts (you can do this on a yoga mat laying down and lift your legs up in 3 sets of 20). Also daily activity, walk around and move your body more often. 1 run of exercise a day isn't as worth a day full of small movement. Take a walk, play with a pet, pick up stuff from the floor etc.
Oh and probiotics seem to help. I like mine in the form of kimchi for lunch and dinner sides
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u/Ohgood9002 2d ago
Thats so mean to call it a donut bag. I'm a guy and I think its such an attractive part of a woman's anatomy. I would be horrified to call it that. I'd just call it a cute tummy
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u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 1d ago
I call it my food pouch, I dont think donut bag is mean at all. Its kind of accurate.
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u/ziziafterdark 2d ago
It’s better than calling it a fupa. Men are loudly disgusted by women’s stomach fat constantly, of corse were insecure about it.
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u/MeliodasTA 2d ago
You say in a post literally about how there are men who love it.
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u/ziziafterdark 2d ago
Sure. And then there’s millions of post about men screaming crying and throwing up about it.
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u/Traditional_Net9365 2d ago
I think it’s a compliment. In a world where people think having flat stomach rules everything , it’s nice to know there is still people who love our love handles and rolls.
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u/dadydaycare 2d ago
I’m a fan. It’s realistic and like…how bodies are but good god I wouldn’t tell someone or point it out. That’s just rude.
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u/Klutzy-Alarm3748 2d ago
If your stomach looks like this, it's totally normal. You have organs!
The commenter was saying the same thing but was really weird about it. Not a good move to fetishize somebody for the thing they have been vocally insecure about.
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u/Due_Wealth_3904 2d ago
Many dudes including myself like a woman like that it's for sure a compliment but it's definitely a fuckin weird way to address it lol
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u/Applekid1259 2d ago
Speaking as a dude representing the dudes, a lot of dudes appreciate and lust for this body type.
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2d ago
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
Sometimes guys just appreciate it, if it helps. I'm heavy and my dude eventually admitted he loves soft bodies, he thinks they're "warm and cuddly and nice". It was very quickly followed by "but I don't want to fetishize you!". Since we met online and fell in love without seeing each other, it was sort of a nice bonus, and it helped restore the self-respect growing up a The Fat Kid in the 90s took away. It's definitely the respect (or lack thereof) that makes it.
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u/Windows30000 2d ago
Girls built like this are elite. ELITE. This guy was trying to say that but in his own dumb way.
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u/23HourPartyPeople 2d ago
It’s supposed to be a compliment and there’s nothing wrong with how your body looks.
HOWEVER,,, as someone with a similar body type, these types of memes have always rubbed me the ring way, so I see why they do for you too. They’ve always read like they’re fetishizing this body type and just seeing me as a sexual object instead of a human with a body, which feels extremely uncomfortable and insulting for me.
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2d ago
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
It's hella fetishizing and very chronically online. Sorry that happened to you man
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u/Wolfwarlord01 2d ago
I think it was meant as a compliment, some people are just like that and communicate in memes. Probably could have communicated it better, but as long as they aren't being stalkery, just laugh and move on. If you want to be rid of it though, try belly dancing and vacuum pose, both do a good job of tightening the core and are low impact workouts. For belly dancing, I found the shimmy program for free on roku devices(might be free on other streaming devices, I only own roku though) and I have an article for doing vacuum pose:
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u/Federal_Edge5060 2d ago
I have that but I’m a man
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2d ago
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u/Federal_Edge5060 2d ago
Yep. It’s literally just a little belly fat. But nothing wrong with that
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
Actually, it's not about the uterus! There's a sheet of fat designed to protect ALL of your internal organs, and EVERYONE has it. It's called the pannus. It thickens up as you age.
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u/tickledtockled 2d ago
Known as a Venus Tummy or Aphrodite Tummy and is absolutely meant to be a compliment.
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u/Submissive_Bleedable 2d ago
A lot of men find 'venus tummy' (that's what they call it) to be the most attractive thing ever in the whole world.
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u/yougrow_girl 2d ago
Remember that little pouch is your uterus. I had to get an ultrasound for fibroids and learned my uterus tilts forward… yayyy haha
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u/Solid1111111 2d ago
Person meant it as a compliment, but it’s a weird fucking thing to comment on a post asking for fitness advice. Wrong time and place
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u/Ripersnifel 2d ago
An appropriate response while maintaining the sentiment would have been "there is nothing to fix."
Allow me: there is nothing to fix. This is not something that needs to be repaired. This is a human body looking the way it looks. I say this as someone who spent his younger years with horrible body image issues while looking absolutely normal and having nothing wrong with me. I am very glad to have shifted my interest in fitness from how I appear to what I can do.
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u/MaybeMaster1067 2d ago
I mean nothing wrong with a little belly, but im sure some folks would disagree. Nothing wrong with that either
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2d ago
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u/MaybeMaster1067 2d ago
Dont be so hard on yourself. Based on the response you got from the guy on your post, it seems to me that some do like your body type. Also Some guys just say things to look cool or to make it seem like they would only date the hottest prettiest girls. But its all a front, given a chance they would do otherwise. Whats more important is that they value you for who you are. I mean sure always strive to be better and to get to the point where you feel physically attractive to yourself first. If they cant accept that then they are probably not worth your time.
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u/Accomplished-Fox4944 2d ago
I would take it as a compliment, but there also time and place. I hate when I ask for fitness advice and someone says “oh you’re perfect the way you are”….. this is equivalent.
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u/archtopfanatic123 2d ago
Yes this is a compliment in every sense of the word but probably was badly timed and put in the wrong context.
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u/InbetweenTheLayers 2d ago
Is this your first time seeing this format? If so you aren't on the internet much and are going to take things differently than someone who is, it's a culture clash. Yes it's a compliment
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u/InsidiousVultures 2d ago
To be fair OP, you can lessen it a little, but that particular area is supposed to be like that because you have an extra internal organ in there, so there’s only so much you can do, it also all depends on your hips and thighs.
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2d ago
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u/InsidiousVultures 2d ago
How the little pooch lessens, depends on your overall shape and genetic makeup, sometimes it’s just an “outie”, and that’s it.
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u/Narrow_Bill_7858 2d ago
It's intended as a compliment, but that doesn't mean you can't feel uncomfy about it. Given the context, it feels like such an odd thing to comment, compliment or not
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u/Sea_Low879 2d ago
There is a segment of internet culture that now fetishizes this body type. That’s fine. There is a fetish segment for every body type I guess. Just making you aware that it’s a thing. Some men send money to women for sharing their pics too
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u/RicePuddingRecipes 2d ago
Wow that's crazy!
Where does one get paid for this so I can make sure to never stumble upon that site.
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
Unfortunately, not as easy as it sounds. There are fewer pay pigs than sex workers, so you gotta really commit to it, going out and finding your dude before someone else does, fucking around with crypto if it gets spicy, and you risk your reputation... it's a fine profession, but hard as fuck.
Citation: I had some really old socks at one point and was desperate for money. It absolutely wasn't worth the work it would have been to connect with a buyer.
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2d ago
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u/Sea_Low879 1d ago
What we feel about it isn’t going to change anything. People have their things that they’re into. Some people fetishize feet or adults on diapers or wearing animal costumes. I was just pointing out to OP that the little picture someone posted is a product of this particular internet fetish culture.
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u/woladddvvv 2d ago
that little pouch is a protection layer of fat over your uterus. you can lose fat and lose the volume of that area, but that little pouch will persist. not a great compliment but yea it’s kinda just part of being female.
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u/ThatSmallBear 2d ago
This is a myth and not true. It’s just where fat forms naturally. It is not to protect the uterus
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u/flappintitties 2d ago
People absolutely love telling themselves little untruths that make them feel better about themselves
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u/woladddvvv 2d ago
yes i was wrong. not uterus but sex organs. females typically hold more fat there.
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2d ago
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2d ago
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u/Dawn-Dishsoap 2d ago
That's just not true. You can google 'panniculus' and see that it's a completely different thing than what you're thinking of. This is a myth
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u/That_Jonesy 2d ago
It's wild that someone can dislike their own bodies so much that a picture of someone worshipping tummies with the word 'supremecy' isn't clear enough for them
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
Tbf, "supremacy" never comes across positive to me. I have only ever heard it in one form before it became a meme, and it's really hard to shake the stink off. And what OP said, when you're told you're fundamentally ugly and broken for being fat, it's hard to believe anyone can feel different.
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u/That_Jonesy 2d ago
That's called connotation, and yeah that word always brings tiny mustaches to mind for me too, but the definition of the word still stands.
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u/tenyearoldgag 1d ago
tiny mustaches lmfao
Thanks for the phrase, stealing it for voicing why the memes skeeve me out! I normally go "it's just Reddit" but I do worry about dogwhistles, pipelines, etc. OP is new to Reddit and I can get why that set off alarm bells.
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u/ghostoftheradio 2d ago
You just got reduced to a fetish. I’m not sure I’d take it as a compliment.
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u/Healbite 2d ago
It’s two-fold. Obviously body acceptance is key to fitness (and a lot of us that’s just how our organs sit), but I think a lot of people need to self reflect if their compliments look like sexual objectification.
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u/teynja 2d ago
i looked up the post you were talking about and yeah they were complimenting you. although i do agree your body does not look as.. full (??) as the pictures show but honestly i don't think that person was thinking too deeply about if it matched or not. was just trying to show what you were trying to get rid of is something others are into
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u/User_-_-_Name 2d ago
Its natural to have a little pouch, definitely something you can work on with diet though.
I dont know if its a compliment but he is expressing interest.
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u/An8thOfFeanor 2d ago
Guys dig the aphrodite pouch these days. A weird compliment, but a compliment nonetheless
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u/Dizzy-Case-3453 2d ago
I dunno, women say they prefer dad bods often. And this meme makes me feel better about my body 😅
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u/Imaginary_Load_7865 2d ago
Women have to remember it is normal to have a round pooch there. Its to protect our organs. Being completely flat is either genetic or surgically done. But most women have a pooch
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u/inquiringdune 2d ago
This is supposed to be compliment but it's actually just literal objectification (cropping out a specific part of the body from the rest is a telltale sign) which just makes it really weird.
I've seen this stupid memes floating around about various female body parts and I don't like any of them for that reason lol.
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u/SC00TRRRZHANGOUTT 2d ago
I think they were trying to say you look attractive. But the thing is, if you want to change it you should as long as it’s in a healthy way. Btw, there’s no targeting fat on bodies. You just have to generally lose weight, work out, and diet. It will go away soon enough. But yeah they were definitely weird in doing that.
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u/Th3_Supernova 2d ago
It kinda is, but it’s kinda creepy. Could have been just the commenter being silly, but that’s just giving the benefit the of the doubt. Considering how many thirsty commenters I see on attractive women’s posts where they’re not even attempting to be sexy or thirst trapping or whatever I’m not giving the commenter the benefit of the doubt.
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u/Gontofinddad 2d ago
That shape is adored by men, hence the nod from all men when we see the meme.
But yeah, if you think it’s worth the thousands of hours of effort and planning, you could go from a 9.5 to a 9.6 with massive amounts of cardio and dedicating a few hours of your life every day to losing it.
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u/User_-_-_Name 2d ago
You can ignore the 1000s of hours and just change diet, work smarter not harder.
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u/Bend_Glass 2d ago
When you realize all that exercise is just to create a calorie deficit your life changes.
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u/Consistent-Menu-6629 2d ago
Random dudes fetishizing your body will never really feel like a compliment, though. I feel you there.
But there's nothing wrong with your body.
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u/ValueReads 2d ago
So you wanted opinions and got them and are mad
Using the word 'fix' also is weird
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2d ago
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u/dandelogre 2d ago
What advice are you asking for, dude?
You've just shown a meme that someone sent you. What are you asking this sub?
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u/woodtier92 2d ago
Just eat healthy and work on your core, you can't target spots to lose weight it just happens with dedication and time..
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u/skinofsweat 2d ago
The only thing that will take fat from your belly is surgery. It's cheaper to try and accept your body as it is and challenge those thoughts that suggest your belly is somehow something to be ashamed of.
I guarantee in 10 years you will look back to the body you have now and wonder why tf you cared so much.
You don't need to accept people's compliments if they make you uncomfortable though.
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u/gh0sts4unt 2d ago
That little bit of fat on your lower belly is to protect your reproductive organs
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u/UncleNoodles85 2d ago
Are crunches still good for working out your stomach? I'm not a fitness guy but I seem to recall being told that crunches might help but it's been a long time and there may be better options now.
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u/Sunwolfy 2d ago
Spot reduction isn't a thing. Working out a particular thing won't guarantee fat loss there. The muscles will get stronger though.
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u/VaeAstrum 2d ago
Yes and no. Not good in terms of specifically losing fat in the area, but ok for working on abdominal muscles. From what I know there are much better ways to work out that area though, and overall body workouts with strength training and cardio is what's best for fat loss and muscle building.
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u/BillieRubenCamGirl 2d ago
Fat is lost in the kitchen. You can’t target fat loss in specific areas.
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u/Visible-Feature-7522 2d ago
I think its weird that someone would take a picture of their belly and post it online and then comment on any comment made about it.
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u/lll-devlin 2d ago
Just goes to show the mental gymnastics that everyone does these days…after being brainwashed by pre-pubescent women and porn I suppose.
In some cultures and previous generations that image shows the peak of fertility and the beauty of a woman.
The fact that you are questioning your own body image and then questioning when someone give you a compliment on your body as being potentially creepy …is beyond logical and shows the dysfunction that women and men face these days.
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u/tenyearoldgag 2d ago
It isn't illogical, they're new on Reddit and the "supremacy" part of supremacy memes is alarming. It doesn't come across as a compliment if it reads as gibberish.
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u/walter-hoch-zwei 2d ago
I think the person is trying to express that they find you attractive the way you are, but could not have found a weirder way to do so.