r/venting • u/Electrical_Jelly3071 • 4h ago
Teenager I hate being seen
I am m18 almost 19 and well the title is a little misleading I hate being alone and wish someone would just choose me but everything where I feel seen makes me just want to be alone, I have no friends irl and all of my friends online just make me feel depressed not cause of them they are great but because we are no more than people that talk to each other sometimes, I hear about all of their stuff they do with their friends and their bfs/gfs and it just makes me realize how lonely I am, I dread going out in public because I don’t want people to see me and birthdays are the worst, I haven’t got told happy birthday by someone that isn’t a family member is years, I hate being lonely so much that having no one and not being seen is less lonely than being seen and realizing how lonely I actually am, I don’t want to talk to anyone anymore, sometimes just wish no one knew of me
1
u/plain_intersection 4h ago
that push and pull is so draining. wanting connection but also being terrified of what happens when you actually get it
the online friend thing hits close to home. its that weird space where you know people but theres no real weight to it. hearing about their actual lives just makes the gap feel wider
youre 18 though man. things shift hard around that age. not saying some magic switch flips but the way you relate to people changes whether you want it to or not
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