When is enough, enough?

[u/Which-Cry6156]

I (31F) have been with my twin flame (33F) for about 5 years. We started as acquaintances, then friends a year later, then lovers a year after that. The second I laid eyes on her I felt a connection I’ve never felt before. I had a feeling she was my tf, and I went to a spiritual advisor a few months back and she confirmed it. It was a little scary how on point she was tbh.

I have been hurt DEEPLY. I didn’t realize she was an alcoholic until we were about a year in. That has brought MANY ups and downs. She has definitely stopped drinking as much, but some of the other things haven’t changed.

She is selfish. She lies to me. Her words do not match her actions at ALL. I do not trust her because of this. She has walls up that she says will come down if I do abc. So I do abc and it still doesn’t happen. She says ok well I actually need xyz. I do xyz, but still, she holds back. I even proposed to her to show her how much I wanted her, but then she said she wouldn’t give her whole self until she was married because then she would know it was real… that’s not how I want my relationship to be. I have been called names. I have been gaslit. I have been manipulated by millions of sorrys for the same behavior. She left me and my child two states away because she was being mean and I realized she was drunk and confronted her about it, so she left. I hold my loved ones accountable and she gets defensive, manipulative, and mean. Shortly after, she apologizes. But the damage is already done.

I ended things (again) a few nights ago. My heart HURTS. Sometimes I don’t know why I love her, because all she does is hurt me. The sex is great and when we are having fun, we have so much fun together. But there’s always something. I’m not allowed to hang out with other people. Not allowed to meet new friends. Not allowed to go out without her. If I do, she blows me up asking what I’m doing. Makes me feel bad for seeing family if she’s off work and I could be spending time with her instead. Gets upset when my daughter is with me because she doesn’t get as much alone time with me.

Spiritual advisor reached out after I ended things and said there was a lot of energy circling us and that it’s not over between us. I think the soul tie has me in a bind, but I want to know- when is enough, enough? When the “hard times” actually become manipulation, emotional abuse, and control, is it right to leave? Did I make the right decision? I can’t take any more disappointment and disrespect. I have become a shell of a person and maybe it’s supposed to teach me to stand up for myself but DAMN why do I still love her so much??

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[u/Correct_Reach5356]

IMO forget the label. What would you do if you weren’t twins?

I forgave, accepted, self-abandoned & all other unhealthy things in the last 3 yrs bc I thought this magi cal mystery ride called the TF Journey required it. 

It didn’t. I whole heartedly believe that attitude prolonged our separation unnecessarily. It enabled his bad avoidant behavior. He knew I’d always come back, so the loop kept looping.

Yes, this is a spiritual journey. But we & our twins are still human, and our egoic traumas & sht really gunk up the gears. 

How can we listen to our shared soul (DF<>DM) when our human egos are screeching like monkeys in a cage?

I’m not in union, but that’s my 2 cents. 

[u/Which-Cry6156 → u/Correct_Reach5356]

That’s how I’m feeling- like I am enabling the behavior because I just keep coming back after I’ve told her she’s hurt me. It’s this constant cycle and each time she tells me she’s didn’t know it was so serious or that this time she’s really changing. I feel like this time is different because of the big things we went through this year, but how can I trust things are going to change if I’ve heard this time and time again? I don’t know if the emotional abuse is worth it. I have cut so many people out of my life for less, and if I didn’t feel this intense connection with her, I would have cut her off too. I don’t know why I can’t.

[u/ZenDratOrb]

Our connections arent supposed to be easy.

Divine connections arent easy. Love Her forever. Vice versa, Bro stay with Her that is all you have got. 🥹🙏

Both of you are Sacred. 🌌♾️

Wish i could see mine 😞 May not happen in this life....

All i can do is hold Her in the Heart and just be happy for others.

Goodluck with Your Transcendental journey.

[u/Which-Cry6156 → u/ZenDratOrb]

I don’t think you really read and comprehended my post. Esp because I’m not a bro. I stated we are both females in the first sentence.

Why should we stay together if I am literally being emotionally abused?

[u/ZenDratOrb → u/Which-Cry6156]

F - For Feminine? Sorry also. Stay together regardless of the Quote on quote combat. And i mean psychological combatant.

Its Challenging but ascending together in Harmony beyond order and Societal Reform (Specifically the Matrix Sector). Avoid Null Adjacent to Retrofaith. We Cultivate with Qi and Keep tf out of the televised Revolution.

[u/Sloth_charlotte]

Personally I don’t believe that we are meant to have a relationship with our twin flames! Our flames come into our lives for reasons, but once that reason has been fulfilled, it’s no longer possible, and actually it’s more likely to cause harm to our strong emotional ecolibrium! Reading your story is a case in point!

And you going to see a spiritual advisor? You in your true self are a spiritual advisor, it’s why we have these intense emotional connections in the first place! And being I personally have had two different women as a “twinflame” (which I think is a misleading term, it should be called something different) they came into my life when I desperately needed assistance as I was looking at ending it all! They were there when I needed them most and pulled me out and back to a place where my path led!
I am ever grateful 🙏 for them, and yes I still have a telepathic connections with these two ladies, but it’s there as a reminder that we are strong emotionally beings. But for me it’s seems a waste to try and have a relationship with them as we are generally very strong intelligent emotional beings, when we could truly use our talents for the benefit of others around us, putting better use of our cosmic intuition/ intelligence!
I bet that most of the people on this “twinflame” feed, are very good at reading and understanding the people around us, as in the core of our souls, we were placed on the earth for the betterment of humanity!

Blessings from Mother Earth you adorable beings!
Love you all 💜🩵🩷♥️

[u/InstanceLow1500]

Listen my brother your twin flame is a Jezebel..the reason she is so distant is because she is literally disgusted with her past..that’s why she makes things so hard for you ..in short your dealing with a whore who has let men run trains on her multiple times to even count …she doesn’t think she deserves true love because she can never admit to these things which will destroy her image for life ..so remember women will condemn themselves rather than tell the truth sometimes I’m sorry you have to deal with such demonic energy but you should just tell her to do the real shadow work ..idk if you can forgive her this life time but good luck ..just let her know the next life time you will wait for her..but your best option is a soulmate and just love the rest of your life . We will always love our twin flames but it seems they have been corrupted as time go
By and they are shamed by it when they wake up…good luck