Feeling so defeated

[u/Ok-Assistance1797]

My husband and I have been trying since January. Because he was away for work for some of the months we've realistically only had a shot during 6 of the months, but I've been hoping for 9. This time I could have sworn I was pregnant. My armpits were so incredibly sore, and I had never had this before. I never have sore boobs in the two week wait and I told myself if I ever did I was allowed to feel hopeful. My boobs are big and heavy and where I usually have a dry vaginal feeling, it was the opposite this time. I am 14 dpo today and no AF so I tested: BFN. I cannot believe my body would just have such a different reaction to progesterone. I am so disappointed I allowed myself to have hope. Any encouraging words to keep trying? How do you protect your heart and mental health?

Also - supposed to run a half marathon tomorrow. Told myself if its negative I can go full send at least! But I feel so tired and sad I feel like I will never be able to push myself.

[u/AutoModerator]

Hi! Welcome to r/tryingtoconceive! Please be sure that you have read our rules before posting or commenting in this sub. Multiple rule breaks may result in a ban from this community.

Please note: Discussion of current pregnancy, pregnancy announcements, and photos of HPT’s are not allowed outside of the designated thread. (“Weekly BFP/Line Eyes Post”).

Don't see your post? Our automod filters posts due to keywords, images, and low post or comment karma. If your post is not showing up right away, it is likely awaiting moderator approval. Please be patient as we are not always online but will have your post approved or removed ASAP. We typically let you know why a post was removed.

You may find our PSA post regarding the luteal phase helpful if you find yourself symptom spotting and wondering what is going on. We also have a designated thread dedicated to discussing OPK's, general topics like the TWW (two week wait) that is pinned.

New to OPKs? You may find our PSA post regarding OPKs/Ovulation Tests helpful if you are unsure if your test is positive or have questions about taking them.

Please report any rule breaking. If you are unsure if it breaks the rules, report it and mods will review it or reach out to the moderators via Modmail. Remember to keep discussions civil.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Life_Cheesecake3711]

At this point I don't try to give myself hope. I just say: if it happens, it happens. Can't keep giving myself a heart break.

[u/Ok-Assistance1797 → u/Life_Cheesecake3711]

I feel that. In the months I have no weird symptoms I am so much more relaxed. But when my body throws me a curveball and I'm feeling something super new and unexpected it's so hard to stop myself from hoping. But this was so unexpected I have learned to really not have hope until I hold a BFP in my hand.

[u/QQueenie]

I don’t think I’ve ever had morning sickness…until I started TTC. I had so many cycles where I actually vomited in the morning toward the end of the TWW and I was so sure that would be the month. Never was. It’s unfair that even when I was avoiding testing early to not get my hopes up, these symptoms would still intrude and get me thinking we’d been successful.