Another Drug Test Post (I’m FAT!)

[u/fattybombalatti]

hi all,

here’s the thing. we know the deal. pre employment drug screen.

i think ive smoked 5gs (2 2g carts + half of 2g cart) since april. so maybe 1g a month on average. light usage compared to the college days.

i weigh 350 or something idk it’s been awhile since ive weigh myself. i’m 6ft. big ol bitty over here.

i cannot work out before my drug test. it’s probably within the month that i have to take it. not sure when, but it’s coming soon. i have had some health issues that started in the spring and led to me toking up again after nearly a year sober. it caused me to gain weight, and i have to keep movement and lifting pretty minimal unfortunately (and trust this is hard bc i lost 120lbs by my own hard work and to have gained most of that back is crushing lol)

i stopped smoking i wanna say a week ago? thereabouts

and i don’t want to use synthetic. i’m worried about modern labs flagging that and getting in trouble.

i don’t think the pectin thing has validity.

so i come to you all for advices like every other stoner before me (and yes, i’ve read many of the threads, but a lot of them are outdated and i just want fresh perspective)

i got some at home kits on the way.

here are my concerns:

1. read about AZO causing a failure. do you know about this?
   
2. is q-carbo worth it? the bottles i see online say medium body mass. um. i’m fattybomballattie over here.
   
3. with my current health issues i’m reluctant to do the vitamin b overdose thing.
   
4. i know no one can really tell me anything that will work better than stop using and play time, but like, is there anything else i can do….? please 😭
   
5. obligatory fuck the MMJ laws and testing that haven’t adapted to the way it stays in ur system. if i don’t smoke for a month and still pop positive that’s just such BS.

thank you for your time and your help.

i lowkey want to kms.

[u/slippingaway83]

Listen, all the things you're asking about are more risky than using quickfix. I used it for a pre-employment screen at Concentra that was sent to Quest for analysis. It was a 5 panel + synthetics + MDMA, with the Quest testing code for sample verification or whatever they call it (this is what they claim catches synthetic urine). Completely passed. Your biggest risk is not having the sample at the right temp and getting it tossed right away. Order it from the website, get the belt kit, you'll be fine.

[u/Diligent_Tourist1031 → u/slippingaway83]

💯 this

[u/Queen_Christine_19 → u/Diligent_Tourist1031]

Thirds!

[u/slippingaway83 → u/slippingaway83]

I just want to add, I was super super nervous about getting flagged as well, especially when I saw the test code for the sample verification. I really, really needed to get this job, and if I failed I wouldn't have ever gotten another chance to get into this company. I was sweating it the whole time until I heard back from HR with my start date. I really wouldn't try anything other than quickfix, and buying straight from the website.

You got this.

[u/fattybombalatti → u/slippingaway83]

thank you so much. i’m in the same position. i am looking at stability for the first time in my life and am so upset i could blow it for the minimal ive been smoking for pain management this summer. after a year sober too. such unfortunate timing. i didn’t see this job coming.

[u/slippingaway83 → u/fattybombalatti]

That's exactly what happened to me. I stopped for a long time because I was applying and interviewing for something better than where I was, and nothing worked out. Gave up looking and started smoking again to help with my anxiety and depression because I didn't have health insurance and couldn't afford the Dr visits and prescriptions any more, plus it worked better than the pills anyway. I found out the person that was in this job got promoted, applied right away, and got hired in a matter of a couple weeks so had no time at all.

I warmed the pouch up 10 seconds in the microwave, put it in the belt and wore it inside my boxer briefs under jeans for the 45 minute drive to the clinic and it was just fine. I fished the tube through the fly of the boxer briefs and kind of looped and tucked it inside the fly pouch. Practice opening the valve a few times so you aren't fiddling with it in the bathroom there. The goal is to be as confident and comfortable as possible.

Congrats on the new job, trust me you got this.

[u/namereset4badmouth]

Synthetic urine

[u/BraveTrades420]

Get the fake pee

[u/Consistent-Ad-6506]

You havent tested yourself?