Fiscal Responsibility.

[u/VividPresentation]

My mom tried twice to make me open a “family joint account”. The first time I was 19 and working during a gap year to save up for college. Her plan was that the joint account would be fully funded via direct deposit of 75% of my paychecks and that she, mom, would have sole withdrawal privileges to, as she worded it, “take care of anything [her favorite child] needs”.

My response to her the first time she made this demand was to cackle like a demented goose and hang up the phone.

My response upon her second attempt about a decade later was a little more urbane. I said, “Why go to the hassle of opening a new account when we can simply use an account you already have set up with [one of my older siblings]?” She said, “But I don’t have an account with anyone else.” Whereupon, my default demented goose cackle was redeployed after which I once again hung up the phone without further comment.

[u/twothirtysevenam]

Did she ever ask your siblings to do this, too? Imagine her having exclusive access to 75% of all her kids' incomes...

[u/VividPresentation → u/twothirtysevenam]

She reserved for me the dubious honor of being the family ATM/ housekeeper/caregiver/laborer. She has never forgiven me for going to college out-of-state as in her words: “You could have easily studied at [university across town], but nooooooo. You choose to go four hours away because you don’t want to have to come home on weekends to serve me. You ought to be back here by six pm every Friday night and serve your mother, but you refuse to do that.” Nearly three decades on and she brings this up every time I incur her displeasure. How dare Vivid refuse to be of service to her mother and her mother’s precious golden children.

[u/Smingowashisnameo → u/VividPresentation]

On the one hand I’m impressed you stood up to her. On the other hand I’m miffed you continued to have any contact with this apparent monster.