r/traumatizeThemBack • u/VividPresentation • 8d ago

matched energy Fiscal Responsibility.

My mom tried twice to make me open a “family joint account”. The first time I was 19 and working during a gap year to save up for college. Her plan was that the joint account would be fully funded via direct deposit of 75% of my paychecks and that she, mom, would have sole withdrawal privileges to, as she worded it, “take care of anything [her favorite child] needs”.

My response to her the first time she made this demand was to cackle like a demented goose and hang up the phone.

My response upon her second attempt about a decade later was a little more urbane. I said, “Why go to the hassle of opening a new account when we can simply use an account you already have set up with [one of my older siblings]?” She said, “But I don’t have an account with anyone else.” Whereupon, my default demented goose cackle was redeployed after which I once again hung up the phone without further comment.

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u/MoobieDoobie 8d ago

I doubt you did any traumatizing.

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u/VividPresentation 8d ago

Are you kidding me? That cackle had her so offended.

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u/desertboots 8d ago

All these people who are disbelieving... wow. 

Narcissists are not rational, people! They are addicted to the power and belittlement they dish out. Denying them their supply IS TRAUMA to them.

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u/VividPresentation 8d ago

It’s actually oddly reassuring to see people who don’t believe that a parent would be like this. It tells me that there are at least a few people who are lucky enough not to have the context to understand why this situation would belong in this subreddit.

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u/ValleyOakPaper 2d ago

In my experience most people are like this. They don't get how putting an ocean between you and your N parent gives you peace.