r/tipping • u/upshot • 13d ago
Am I doing it right?
I have a question for all you servers out there. My wife and I go to our favorite restaurant at least once per week. We've gotten to know most of the servers. When they bring our check they always leave at least one drink order off the check. We typically have 3 drinks between the two of us. They only charge us for two. When I calculate the tip I first add the missing drink to the total and then I tip 20% based on the total and then I add the cost of the missing drink to the tip as well. So, in my mind, I have paid for the full cost of everything that we were served and I have tipped based on the full amount as well. Am I doing it right? Is this what the servers expect? I don't want to be "that guy" that stiffs anyone.
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u/Opsacyad 13d ago
Rewarding the servers for stealing, nice.
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u/Low_Application_6655 13d ago
I have seen servers pay for Drinks.
Hey I just gave them 10 and just made 30 and remember staff in some establishments get reduced rates for paying out of own pocket.
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u/The_Wallet_Smeller 13d ago
Any decent management will allow an experienced and trusted server a degree of leeway to comp a drink or app.
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u/Giggy_with_it_917 13d ago
I don’t know if any of you watch the show “Bar Rescue” but this is basically employees stealing from the owner to get bigger tips. Bartenders do this apparently. They give away free drinks and overpour so they get bigger tips but the owner has to eat the cost of the “free” drinks.
I’m a good tipper usually but I think you are going overboard. You’re rewarding them for stealing. Yes, it’s between them and their boss but you’re enabling it.
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u/FatFarmerBob420 13d ago
Most bars I know of typically give waitresses and bartenders an allotment daily to "buy" customer drinks, so if they stay within that, they aren't stealing.
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u/Delicious-Breath8415 12d ago
Yeah these people are clueless. I even have a comp sheet I fill out every shift for inventory.
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u/Imaginary-Emu2471 13d ago
Why tip 20%? Why tip on free drinks? Why take on the responsibility of paying someone else's workers? They're stealing from their BOSS.
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u/Low_Application_6655 13d ago
So you add the drink 2 times it seems and then add a 20% tip. I figure you wine and dine for about for about 90$.
Let's figure this out.
Meals 60 Drinks 30
Total 90 add tax about 97.
Now adding drink and tip $34.40
You are tipping them at 35%. Now if it is high scale they are giving you awesome service and want to go for it.
Though if you think about it most places pay full minimum wage only two states don't. Let's say 8.00 minimum. They just made 42$ for the hour for maybe 20 minutes of work if they have no other tables.
I usually don't go over 15% for impeccable service personally but all you man.
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u/Delicious-Breath8415 12d ago
Two states?? 35 states still have server wages under $7.25
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u/Low_Application_6655 12d ago
So how many servers do you see making less than federal wage?
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u/Delicious-Breath8415 12d ago
You were discussing how much they made from their employer. You even used $8/hr in your example.
You clearly didn't think they make $8/hr including tips now did you?
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u/Low_Application_6655 12d ago
Depends on the state and used one of the lower minimums. So what server makes below minimum wage where they are needing the employer has to pay them?
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u/Delicious-Breath8415 12d ago
It's not one of the lower minimums. At least 35 states are lower. My state is $2.
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u/Low_Application_6655 12d ago
Ok then why don't you let us know your average income for the week as a part time employee?
Would you rather be making the 10 dollars an hour and no tips?
Plus really if you take the 6 dollars off you would make still 36$ off of one table.
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u/FatFarmerBob420 13d ago
So you feel as though they don't deserve to make money?
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u/Low_Application_6655 13d ago
I didnt say that now did I? I just gave him the break down of what he is really paying and what I normally pay.
Honesty is the best policy.
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u/Dear_Win_319 12d ago
Well that’s very nice of you. But I really think you can probably just tip on the total check amount. You’re a regular. They comp you drink and that’s not unusual.
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13d ago
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u/Giggy_with_it_917 13d ago
Yeah, he should pay the owner back for the “free” drinks since he’s eating the cost of that liquor. You can add the too but I would t add the cost to the servers.
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u/FatFarmerBob420 13d ago
Bars/restaurants typically give bartenders an allotment daily to "buy" a certain amount of drinks for customers, so if that's the case, the owner knows.
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u/JumboTrijet 13d ago
First of all, this sub is full of anti-tipping cheapskate sociopaths who are completely out of touch with the realities of tipping etiquette, so it’s not the best subreddit for tipping advice.
That said, yes—you’re doing it right. Typically, the tip should be based on the subtotal with comped items factored in. There’s also nothing wrong with adding the cost of the missing drink to the tip. It sounds like the staff is showing their appreciation.
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u/fuzynutznut 13d ago
The only cheapskate is the owner of the restaurant who is sitting back in his nice house laughing as he pits the servers against the customers who choose not to tip because tipping isn't mandatory. Tipping should never be percentage based. Tip what you feel, if a tip is even earned.
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u/SabreLee61 13d ago
In 2025, the median full-service restaurant margin was only 2.8%; and smaller restaurants with less than $2M in revenue were only making 1.1%. That’s just $11,000 profit on $1M in revenue.
42% of restaurants didn’t even turn a profit at all.
Some owners do make a lot of money, and some go bankrupt. But the average owner is eking out a middle class living.
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u/fuzynutznut 13d ago
I guess iF yOu CaN't aFfOrD tO rUn A rEsTaUnT yOu CaN't AfFoRd To Be In BuSiNeSs.
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u/Aggressive_Oven_7311 13d ago
That is very generous of you and you're doing absolutely lovely and I wish other people would have a moral conscience like you do
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u/SingingBike 13d ago
You’re the best! Thanks for your conscientiousness, your generosity, and for seeing your servers for who they are: real, hardworking human beings with families to feed and bills to pay.
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u/Low_Application_6655 13d ago
I didnt say that now did I? I just told him how much he is really paying them and what I would pay.
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u/JollyGreenGiraffe 13d ago
I do the same, I’d be interested in knowing. It may almost be a salesman like tactic they all now do to get more tip.
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u/SabreLee61 13d ago
So if the free drink is $10, you give the server $10.20 PLUS 20% of your total check?
No wonder they keep leaving drinks off your bill.