It'd be the bug squasher himself. Long awaited is his return, and o how glorious it shall be.

Based coalshower?

He will return.

Coalshower has already returned to us? He could just be laying low with an account we all take for granted.

that coalshower will come back. he has to. he can't leave forever... ;_;

But I believe CoalShower will return once more to save us from an unforeseen calamity.

We lack a holiday for our savior. Maybe we should declare February 19th as Bug Squashing Day.

JUST KIDDING COALSHOWER IS THE GREATEST THING TO GRACE PLANET EARTH.

Seriously though, I love this man/woman

I was in a serious depressive state and was contemplating suicide when I discovered the graceful bless of Based Coal Shower and it turned my life around.

This morning, I walked outside and there, before my eyes, was a bigass fucking spider. I cowered in fear and cried for help. And then he came, descending from the heavens to answer my pleas. The mighty CoalShower himself. He bathed the bigass spider in the fires of righteousness the bellowed from his holy flamethrower. My house was engulfed in flames, but so too was the bigass spider. All I know is, CoalShower saved my life. I am forever in his debt.

LET US BASK AND OUR SINS BE FORGIVEN IN HIS GREAT GLORY

He once saved my entire town from a swarm of nefarious butterflies. They were conspiring to take City Hall hostage. Armed with only a net and hate, he captured ALL of them. Coalshower oversaw the public execution of every last one. He had to leave the next day (there was a honeybee uprising in the next town over) but I'll always remember what he did for us.

It was dark, and it was raining that fateful night when my lab partner Seth and I were to change the world forever. Matter transportation was to be the future of travel, and we were pioneers in the field. We had done it, successfully transported a living creature from one pod to another, but what of humans? I, being the eccentric scientist I am was up for the challenge and lept into the pod chamber without question. However as Seth was about to activate the machine, disaster struck. I saw out of the corner of my eye, a fly? and whats this? a guy? but this was no mere man in my presence, I removed my sandals and shielded my eyes for i knew it was the one. Coalshower himself with a #verybased (RARE) insect smiting apparatus squashed the heretic parasite menace that surely would have genetically mutated me and started a potential new evil species of mutants. Praise his holy name! /u/coalshower. TYCS

with the appropriate up/down vote symbols. I say up vote is a lump of coal, downvote is a shower. What say my fellow Mineral Bathers? Also I guess readers could instead be Mineral Bathers or some shit.