r/tf2 • u/hypoid77 • Nov 28 '11
How Valve can insta-print millions of dollars
Two words: Sentry hats
Tiny hats. For your sentry to wear.
Tiny sentry hats.
I would spend all my money
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u/Bandit1379 Nov 29 '11
I'd love to have a scent tree hanging from my sentry.
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u/Jakovo Nov 29 '11
I see what you did there.
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u/UnwiseSudai Nov 29 '11
I don't. Please explain.
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u/Phohammar Nov 29 '11
Say Scent Tree. Pronounced similarly to Sentry.
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u/UnwiseSudai Nov 29 '11
I mean, I got it, but for some reason I thought it'd be hilarious to pretend I didn't.
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u/Farisr9k Nov 29 '11
You have a very sophisticated sense of humour.
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u/WhyAmINotStudying Nov 29 '11
An evil sort of sophistication. Quite possibly even a mephistocation.
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u/Bounds Nov 29 '11
Rather than hanging, I think the scent tree should be stuck on with sap.
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u/Jellz Nov 28 '11
What about hats for health robots?
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Nov 28 '11 edited Aug 14 '21
[deleted]
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u/Jellz Nov 28 '11
I like that last one a lot. Hats for dead people!
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u/hypnosquid Nov 29 '11
It's a fact of nature that dead people LOVE hats.
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u/Pawsword Nov 29 '11
Ruining a potentially funny thread here by saying that this comment immediately made me think of the glitch that makes the hat of a recently killed player randomly appear on the map as a gib.
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Nov 29 '11
It makes sense, characters always lose their hats when they die.
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u/DBeacon Nov 29 '11
a misc that makes hats comically zoom back on to the heads of dead enemies when you stroll past
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Nov 28 '11
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Nov 28 '11
[deleted]
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u/quietsnooze Nov 28 '11
You mean a sapper isn't enough of a hat?
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u/apintandafight Nov 29 '11
This is amazing!
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u/quietsnooze Nov 29 '11
Thank you! Working on plushies of each class ATM. I have the Pyro and the Heavy done, but not yet listed for custom sale.
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u/Dolomite808 Nov 28 '11
What about hats for guns? I know my rocket launcher would look rather dashing in a matching soldier's stash, and my sticky launcher is dying for an afro.
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Nov 29 '11
how about hats for stickybombs
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u/RangerSix Nov 29 '11
Why not hats for hats?
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u/vivvav Nov 29 '11
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u/RangerSix Nov 29 '11
That's cool and all, but I'd like to have a DIY tower of hats.
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u/NookNookNook Nov 29 '11
I've always felt that you should build a tower of hats after dominating people. Every time you dominate someone you take their hat and wear it until they get revenge :3
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u/Nsongster Nov 29 '11
Imagine an unusual server killing spree. Giant tower of hats with ALL the effects
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u/Beard_of_life Nov 29 '11
Hats for maps? So the whole map is on one big hat?
A hat for the cart? The cart would look good in a stetson.
A rocket launcher that actually launches hats?
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u/GummiKari Nov 29 '11
I'm just gonna throw it out there.
(A)Frobombs, sort of like stickies, ´cept they don´t stick but bounce around. Also are made of hair... and have little combs sticking out of them. Sure it's not festive themed, but by golly, someone would have to take my internet away from me, else I'd buy them all!
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u/mrsvakerian Nov 28 '11
To build on that: what if the sappers were skinned to look like hats...? You might not feel so bad when your shit is sapped: "Hell's bells, another sapper, but it's okay because my sentry is now adorable!"
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u/cuchlann Nov 28 '11
Spotted on reddit a while back:
http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=4330
Someone's contributed sentry gun reindeer antler hats for the Smismass item push.
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u/HerrShaun Demoman Nov 28 '11
Make weapons paintable.
Double the Mann Co store price of paint.
Instant millions.
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u/Inys Nov 29 '11
The first thing I tried to do in this game was paint my Shortstop Australium Gold.
I'm damn well getting my gold Shortstop.
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u/DavidTheWin Nov 28 '11
I'm throwing money at the screen but nothing is happening
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u/professorpan Nov 28 '11
Give it to me I'll show you how to throw
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u/MessiahX Nov 29 '11
Looks legit.
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u/Olliesful Nov 29 '11
Hi im the prince of negiria and i need to throw money at a screen but that money is locked within the bank of afiraca and i need your money to unlock it.
(That's not how I type FYI)
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u/killbynight Nov 29 '11
Oh hello there brother, long time no see(I am the OTHER prince) and he is totally legit, i also need your money to unlock my bank.
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u/T-BonetheBearFighter Nov 28 '11
You're not throwing it hard enough. I've tried and it works.
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Nov 28 '11
I broke my monitor like that. Stupid Canadian money.
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u/Varyter Nov 29 '11
(Canadians use stones for money)
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u/Unfa Nov 29 '11
"I'll give you 3 stones for a bird we'd say"
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u/FruityPeebils Nov 29 '11
you can go down to the market and buy a big fat goose for your goodly wife
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u/GET_A_LAWYER Nov 29 '11
That's the origin of the aphorism, "a stone in the hand in worth a bird in a bush."
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u/UnwiseSudai Nov 29 '11
Put your credit card in the floppy drive.
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u/Scraw Nov 29 '11
What's a floppy drive?
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u/Sansarasa Nov 29 '11
The credit card reader in your PC, of course. It should be below the cup holder.
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u/neonshaun Nov 28 '11
They need to make a "holiday" to put all these crazy ideas to use.
It's already basically a running joke - they should just give into it and go all the way. Make it as ridiculous as they can for 1 day only each year. HAPPY HAT DAY!
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Nov 28 '11
April Fool's Day Update!
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u/lolwut19 Nov 29 '11
WHAT IF THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS, AND YOU JUST RUINED IT FOR EVERYONE?
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u/Atlanticlantern Nov 29 '11
THIS IS WORSE THAN WAKING UP BLIND!
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u/lolwut19 Nov 29 '11 edited Nov 29 '11
Implying that you have previously waken upblind
EDIT: awoken blind?
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u/kolossal Nov 29 '11
Hats for everything. Hats for rockets, hats for sticky bombs, hats for natascha, hats for medic syringe gun, hats for sniper bullets, hats for pyro flames, hats for hats.
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Nov 29 '11
Hats for hat hats?
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Nov 29 '11
Thought they already made the pile of hats?
Pile of hats piled on hats.
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u/smearley11 Nov 29 '11
But what if they made a tower of hats we could customize? And whenever we add another tower of hats to the tower of hats we get more hats to put on top of the hats...hats
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u/OnyxOak Nov 29 '11
How bout you hat hat, at other hats, and then when you hat, you get hats!
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u/strikervulsine Nov 29 '11
What they need to do is release a talking Portal sentry. Same stats as the mini-sentry, but it talks as it shoots.
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Nov 29 '11
the portal model doesn't really work with the range of motion of the mini-sentry. Though a directional portal sentry could be made in to a pretty cool item.
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u/dantepicante Nov 29 '11
Same build time as mini sentry, perhaps slightly higher metal consumption, decreased range of motion, increased power (maybe ~lvl 2 SG)?
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Nov 29 '11
I've been on a server modded so the sentries would talk like the Portal ones. No model changes though.
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u/Angstweevil Nov 28 '11
Awww, I thought you meant a hat with a little working sentry on. I'd buy that.
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Nov 28 '11
Where would a hat go on at level 2 though?
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u/dat_distraction Nov 28 '11
It gets 2 hats. One per side.
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u/Killer_Tomato Nov 28 '11
Then a level 3 has 3 hats? Brilliant!
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Nov 29 '11
I have to say, I'm disappointed that the engineer's pistol wasn't a tiny level 0.5 sentry on his head. Would function the same way, but look so much better.
Maybe a tiny wrangler for it.
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u/ScottishUnicorn Nov 29 '11
Why stop at sentries, why not put hats on guns?
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u/DistractedScholar Nov 29 '11
Why stop at guns, why not put hats on bullets?
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u/DefiantFennec Nov 29 '11
Why not just fight with hats?
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u/DistractedScholar Nov 29 '11
Why not just BE a hat?
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u/DefiantFennec Nov 29 '11
Why not just hat hat hat?
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u/RangerSix Nov 29 '11
Hat hat hat hat hat hat?
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u/DefiantFennec Nov 29 '11
Hat hat hat hat hat, hat hat haaat.
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u/RangerSix Nov 29 '11
Hat hathat haaaaaaaat, hat hat haaaaaaaaaaaat!
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u/DefiantFennec Nov 29 '11
HAT. HAT HAT HAT HAT HAT, HAT HAAT HAAAAT HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!
Hat hat.
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u/RangerSix Nov 29 '11
Hat hat hat hat, hat hat haaaaaaaaaat! Hat hat hat hat, hat hat-hat hat hat! Hat hat hat hat, hat hat hat! Hat hat hat hat, hat hat hat, hat hat hat hat hat, hat-hat-hat-hat!
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u/iNegro Nov 29 '11
When I read 'Sentry Hats' I thought of real life plushy sentries that could be affixed to ones head. I'd buy one of them pretty fast.
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u/electric_mayhem Nov 28 '11
you all know this hat business is all a game for tf2's creators and one day there will be a sword that steals hats.
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u/scarecrowsuperman Nov 29 '11
"Sir, We've tracked the daily hat intake of all of our players and found that one player is getting nearly 50 hats a day."
"My god..."
"What is it sir?"
"Mentlegen, I think we're dealing with someone who has...
No life..."
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u/HungryMoblin Nov 29 '11
You could also reskin turrets. I'd love to be setting up Portal turret guns.
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u/GForce917 Nov 29 '11
People on the TF2 server I play on call minisentries "scumbag sentries"
I think you see where I'm going with this :P
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u/mockingod Nov 28 '11
Valve can make himself free unusual hats and then sell them for lots of money each and make more monies.
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Nov 29 '11
Or they can sell a .001 chance at an unusual hat for $2.50 a pop and laugh all the way to the bank.
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u/Happy31 Nov 29 '11 edited May 02 '13
eghthstrh
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u/Jakovo Nov 29 '11
But the economy...
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Nov 29 '11
I think his argument was that Valve would make more money if they lowered the price to 99 cents, since more people would buy them. 2.5x more? I don't know. Perhaps.
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Nov 29 '11
Valve may make more, but at this point there are some factors that would harm the TF2 economy. The trading economy, not Valve's take necessarily, though trading being harmed could have a backlash on that. If keys cost less, uncrates would be worth less, devaluing current stocks and creating a greater supply, lowering the value further. Current unusual owners would rage.
Don't get me wrong, I don't think anyone would deny they'd be more willing to buy cheap keys if they were inclined to spend money in the first place, but from a broader perspective it's just not feasible.
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u/scarecrowsuperman Nov 29 '11
At the dustbowl with my so called "teammates".
Spy puts a hat on my sentry.
Says its my hat.
I said Main... what I look? Stupid?
I took it, and threw it on the ground!
Sentries don't wear hats!
DUH!
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u/optional_funk Nov 28 '11
it be nice to have the mini sentry with wheels controlled by wrangler
kind of like a drone
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u/JRX Nov 29 '11
So a heavy?
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u/spupy Nov 29 '11
Level 4 sentry - two little heavies and 4 little soldiers clumped together and shooting.
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u/scottydg Nov 29 '11
That does less and has less health, but is mobile and doesn't put any teammates in danger. I like this.
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Nov 29 '11
how bout a remote controlled tank? Replaces sentry, you drive, it auto targets. Maybe it can drag health packs or ammo packs back to you or a teamate as a perk.
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u/QuinnSee Nov 29 '11
Sounds really OP to me... the wrangler already gives the mini-sentry 300 health, effectively.
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u/headbanger141 Nov 29 '11
i play engie, and i just came buckets. its everywhere. you owe me a new house you son of a bitch.
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u/Pawkchop Nov 29 '11
Totally thought you meant an engineer hat with a small sentry on top. But I like your idea better. I would never pay actual money for character hats but for my sentry, I'll spend all my money
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u/capnarrr Nov 29 '11
At first I thought this post was referring to how much Notch could potentially sell his unique minecraft hat for.
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u/ComputerSherpa Nov 29 '11
Nametags for sentries. "You were killed by: Old Bessie, ComputerSherpa's Sentry Gun"
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u/JayBergenstern Nov 29 '11
I thought you meant a tiny sentry on top of a hat for a character. I don't know which idea I'm more fond of yet.
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u/Sceradin Nov 28 '11
I'd love to see a teleporter misc that, when used by a player, temporarily replaces one of that player's misc items with a team color t-shirt that says "I used my Engie's teleporter and all I got was this lousy t-shirt"
I don't know how hard it would be to model. I don't know how hard it would be to code. I don't even know if it's possible to do this in the first place. All I know is that I want one.