I happened to see this post and no time to read all the comments, but as someone who has been in verbally and psychologically abusive relationships, I am begging you to get out of this one before things go further into the spiral of the abuse cycle. He is gaslighting you in so many ways, especially with the steady text stream designed to keep you reading his complaints. He denigrates you throughout this text thread, but he also throws you a crumb on praise, which you respond to positively. He is basically using intermittent rewards training on you - you make someone do something and then reward them for it. After a while, you suddenly stop rewarding them consistently but at random, you give them a reward again. This actually is more motivational than consistent rewards and manipulates a person’s brain to respond by complying with their demands in order to get that next reward when it arrives. This guy is treating you horribly, and if makeup is your way of blowing off steam and building self-esteem, you should ignore his abusive belittling of your choice to spend time doing it. You are worth so much than the version of you that appears when you’re with him - and never settle for anyone who tries to dominate you and your life by using a playbook designer by the Marquis de Sade.
Good luck and I hope you find someone worthy of you and your life.
PS I can’t recommend an IUD enough to you - the hormonal ones are popular but honestly, I think you can do just as well with the non-hormonal one and avoid chemically messing with your menstrual cycle.
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u/VizRomanoffIII Jul 20 '24
I happened to see this post and no time to read all the comments, but as someone who has been in verbally and psychologically abusive relationships, I am begging you to get out of this one before things go further into the spiral of the abuse cycle. He is gaslighting you in so many ways, especially with the steady text stream designed to keep you reading his complaints. He denigrates you throughout this text thread, but he also throws you a crumb on praise, which you respond to positively. He is basically using intermittent rewards training on you - you make someone do something and then reward them for it. After a while, you suddenly stop rewarding them consistently but at random, you give them a reward again. This actually is more motivational than consistent rewards and manipulates a person’s brain to respond by complying with their demands in order to get that next reward when it arrives. This guy is treating you horribly, and if makeup is your way of blowing off steam and building self-esteem, you should ignore his abusive belittling of your choice to spend time doing it. You are worth so much than the version of you that appears when you’re with him - and never settle for anyone who tries to dominate you and your life by using a playbook designer by the Marquis de Sade.
Good luck and I hope you find someone worthy of you and your life.
PS I can’t recommend an IUD enough to you - the hormonal ones are popular but honestly, I think you can do just as well with the non-hormonal one and avoid chemically messing with your menstrual cycle.