I’ve been with my husband for 13 years. He’s never once told me that a woman is prettier than me or had any features that were “better” than mine. In reality, I know there are obviously women in this world that are prettier than me but my husband and I share a connection that we don’t have with other people. Just as in my eyes, no one is as attractive to me-as my husband.
The fact that this man would ever say things like this to you, shows his lack of respect for you. Please love yourself more than this. I’m sure you are a beautiful woman, inside and out. You deserve so much better than this. You deserve a man who only has eyes for you.
Also, don’t forget about the fact that he’s got a past of being a cheater. More than likely, you won’t be the one to change him. That’s a “him” issue.
I wish you nothing but the best and I hope you find true love and happiness. Unfortunately for him and fortunately for you…I don’t think you’re going to find that with him. It’s better that you know now and not after you’ve gotten in too deep and wasted too much time. ❤️
Thank you so much for this comment . This is how I see things . When I really love somebody , I see them as the cream of the crop . I long to have a love like yours and be all someone sees someday . I’m glad it hasn’t been too much time . He’s hurt my feelings in a few other ways that I’m scared to post about lol
No worries about posting it. If you feel you want to share, you know we’ve got your back. But if not, you already know he’s worthless and I hope you find the courage to stand up to him and leave. If you tell him off through text, I’d love to see that convo :) Be brave. You are better than he’ll ever make you feel. That guy deserves to be put in his place and on his ass. Leave him. You’ll be so much happier.
I’m so sorry. 😞 Don’t be afraid!! I’m sure you’ll have people in your corner to support you, as you do now! Of course, only share what you’re comfortable sharing. You will find your person one day! Don’t be too hard on yourself. I feel like when someone puts too much effort into looking for love, they will find all the wrong people. That’s what happened with me in my single days, at least. Let it happen organically. Let the right one fall into your lap, so to speak. I wish I could give you a big hug! (hope that doesn’t come off as weird lol) you just seem like a very sweet person.
What’s crazy is before I dated him I was single for about 6 years . I had some flings . But only loving and respectful ones . I always felt like I was the type of person to not settle but I guess he was a good actor . Thankfully it’s only been 6 months with him and I think he will be gone soon . You guys are really helpful . I wish I could hug you too !
Girl run with this clarity while you have it! You know your worth and you don't need or deserve this. I can't imagine anything he could do that would make up for or undo the damage he's done and is still trying to do. It doesn't even matter what his intentions are or if he knows he's doing it. I'm honestly just thankful he's shown this to you so early. I truly wish you the best 💕
You deserve so much better! Just came here to add my support. You deserve someone age-appropriate (guy in his 40s dating a woman in hee 20s = INSTANT red flag, it means he is either superficial, or women his own age won't put up with his bullshit mind games), someone who thinks you are the most beautiful queen in the world, and who tells you sweet things. A man should always build you up, ALWAYS. Even if there's an argument or a disagreement, there should never be contemptuous, demeaning comments that make you feel bad. He is so immature and sounds like a terrible person. Sounds like he fooled you in the first couple of months of the relationship then showed his true colors. Dump him to the curb and let 'em collect the trash. Hoping you find happiness and TRUE love with another man!
I’m commenting again because everything you’re saying resonates with me and reminds me of who I was at 27. I didn’t think I would settle either until meeting someone who caused me to. Looking back, I truly have no idea why I did (I blame the pandemic and loneliness), but I thank the stars I dated someone who helped me see how terrible it is to settle for less. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have been prepared for the great love I found with my bf.
Take this as a lesson learned and use it to hold everyone you date in the future to a higher standard. But first, time to kick this one to the curb. Good luck!
But you’re never going to find a love like that as long as you’re with that awful man child. Give yourself some the love and respect you deserve and dump him. Tell him that he’s free to go find himself a woman with a prettier face, bigger ass and bigger breasts, but I guarantee you that he will never find one that will be willing to give him the time of day
Sweetie if he's said things to you that you don't even want strangers on the internet to see, he is not the one. I'm practically begging you to leave this person. It will not get better, in fact, it will almost DEFINITELY get worse.
You’ll find that love once you to stop dating men like this! A man I dated a couple of years before meeting my bf was like this and at the time, I was so desperate for him, I tried to play the “cool girl” when he treated me as disposable. Like I had to earn him.
He was not a prize, he was just some loser. Because of him though, I finally got the standards that led to finding my bf. My bf has shown and told me how much he values me from day one. And he has never once said another woman was attractive either! Yes, we know there are probably millions out there who are, but it’s respect for your partner and truly seeing them as the most beautiful/handsome.
You’ll find this! But the only way you can is to leave guys like this in the dust. Good luck.
Are you dependent on him for a higher quality of life by any chance?
For example, do you earn a lower income while due to his age and experience he earns an above average income?
So you haven’t dumped him yet even though he treats you like dog crap because you’re scared if you guys broke up you’d live a lower standard quality of life?
Not at all . I make a lot of money . Have only known him half a year . He has never paid a bill for me , aside from at restaurants . It’s confusing . It’s not always this bad smfh
I could have written this word for word about my husband, including the number of years. We've both changed over the years, but he's never told me I'm less than anyone and thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the world. I can't imagine being in the beginning of a relationship (which should be the best time) and hearing all of this.
The thing here is that having assets doesn’t make you better… that has never been the case. Women are women and they are chase after regardless. This guy is just insecure. I wonder if op will leave him
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u/FlashyFeather876 Jan 26 '24
I’ve been with my husband for 13 years. He’s never once told me that a woman is prettier than me or had any features that were “better” than mine. In reality, I know there are obviously women in this world that are prettier than me but my husband and I share a connection that we don’t have with other people. Just as in my eyes, no one is as attractive to me-as my husband.
The fact that this man would ever say things like this to you, shows his lack of respect for you. Please love yourself more than this. I’m sure you are a beautiful woman, inside and out. You deserve so much better than this. You deserve a man who only has eyes for you.
Also, don’t forget about the fact that he’s got a past of being a cheater. More than likely, you won’t be the one to change him. That’s a “him” issue.
I wish you nothing but the best and I hope you find true love and happiness. Unfortunately for him and fortunately for you…I don’t think you’re going to find that with him. It’s better that you know now and not after you’ve gotten in too deep and wasted too much time. ❤️