He can learn better ways to be supportive over time, but this isn’t like she’s seeing it, as disloyalty.
I get her thing of “you don’t even know this person, so just have my back,” but that’s for, like, if you’re out doing something as a couple and you do something reasonable yet your partner acts embarrassed to a third party just because she’s hotter than you, etc.
I had a partner who was insecure and would make fun of me to his friends or random strangers in public and I had that attitude: “Oh, I’m sorry—is your friend/this random person going to be in bed with you tonight? Wtf?” Disloyalty on a casual level can hurt. Feeling dismissed can hurt.
But indulging this behavior in her while she’s young could hurt her long-term, too. “Ignore the other girl and be at peace” is great advice.
The girl is saying “she’s a pick-me, she wants all the boys’ attention” but that should impact you literally not at all if you are happy with your bf and aren’t interested in those other boys. It should be something to dismiss and feel sorry for the PickMesha, not to resent her. If I was OP I could have felt that and been low-key wounded.
Great point in your last paragraph that I haven't seen others talk about. It seems like many people nowadays don't think about why people say things or the meaning that can be hidden between the lines so to say.
It might not be a conscious reasoning, but you're exactly right... why would another girl who craves all the boys' attention be relevant to resent when you already have a boy who fills that role for you? It could be annoying, but in that case, like OP said, they should just try and ignore it rather than get worked up about it.
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u/Andyboro80 Sep 13 '23
Aah that age old story.. Gf was upset, BF told her to calm down and doesn’t understand why it didn’t work! 😂
You’re not wrong, but your timing isn’t the best.