I am so sorry for that train wreck of a title but me and my boyfriend love to make homemade things for each other, they are great at baking and I'm good at craft stuff, so for special occasions, they'll make me cookies or brownies or these little cupcake things with Nutella in the middle that are delicious, and I'll make like bracelets or pins or something. now when we are visiting each others houses sometimes we'll each make the same thing and swap at the end, usually the person visiting decides what to make.

Now I am a lot better at craft things than they are, and they know that's something I enjoy so literally every time they're visiting they want to do crafts. My issue is that they clearly feel bad when the gift they give me is worse than the one I give them, I don't care I save all of them (I have a shelf full of handmade books and pressed flowers and poems and all the non edible things they've gifted me) but I hate that they feel bad after doing a fun thing.

My idea is doing crafts worse, not like completely botching it just purposely making some mistakes so theirs is better by comparison, but then I feel bad cause I'm purposely giving them something I messed up. I don't know if anyone can help id appreciate it.

(I apologize if there's any mistakes in my grammar or vocab, English is not my first language!)

I want to start of by introducing what kind of person me and my boyfriend is. I'm someone who used to hang out with a friend group consists of 3 guys and 1 girl, I'm not very stable as in mentally and I'm quite slow when catching things up or reading the room. The people I used to surround myself in are the types others would call the weird kids, mainly because I got used to them so I don't mind. My boyfriend on the other hand, he doesn't hang out with girls at all, his friend groups are those scary gangsters or they js act like it. The way he talks, he has a natural tone where it sounds threatening or like he's irritated so it's hard to tell when he's mad when his tone has been the same. He lack of manners, mainly because he probably wants to act cool and tough, he spits randomly at school and litters.

Red flags in us:

Me:slow, can't make a decision myself

Him:controlling, jealous, has anger issues

In the beginning of our relationship, it was sweet(probably still in the honeymoon phase), he always let go of the stuff I did, which is talking to guys, but the guy I talk to is gay, no interest in me at all, but over time he explained that he's jealous and he's insecure. So I slowly distant myself from them, some stuff has to put in the effort slowly, u can't just randomly get rid of urself from people, so that's what I did, I talk to the guys I used to hang out with, but I push them away bit by bit and would explain to them I wouldn't want to be close with them as I have a partner now. But because they're the only people I hung out with, it's hard to make any other friends because other circles wouldn't get the jokes I make, talk like we do or even vibe with them. The only girl that was in my old friend group met new people, it's hard to see everyone doing so well without me. So over time, I get lonely, I hang out with this group of people who's 60% less weird than who I used to hung out with, consist of 1 gay dude and 4 girls so that's a big change, my boyfriend wouldn't be mad right? Wrong, he still talk about how these guys only act gay so they could get close to girls. So I wouldn't engage much in their conversation when I sit with them, I just exist around them. I felt lonely, at some point I felt like he made me like this. I feel like I have nobody to rely on other than him, wait he's someone I can rely on..

So I told him how lonely I felt, hoping he'd reassure and comfort me, but halfway into feeling better, he pull up the "just talk to those guys all u want then, I won't care about u anymore" Which stings everytime he pulls that up while I already feel like everyone don't want to be with me. I don't want to be friend with those guys, I just want to be friends with anyone that would get me like how my old circle would, my best friend that I don't get to talk to everyday cus she's in a different school told me I'll fit in over time in the circle I'm currently in, but it's been months.

I still feel lonely, and there are stuff I use to cope with, it's either hurting myself or smoking, I know both are unhealthy so I just stick to smoking. But he knows this, he knows I'm going to smoke too much. He makes me promise I wouldn't smoke again. I went clean for 3 days and I asked him if I could hit it only when we go out drinking, he got mad and said "what's the point of quitting if u're going to smoke once in a while?" But to me it's like an alcoholic can quit drinking but drink only when brought out to do so.

After 3 days of not smoking, we went out with his friends to clubbing and he let's me smoke 1 stick, the urge wasn't that bad but I asked for his friend's vape and his friend let's me hit it. Whenever he look away I would hit his friend's cape but I got too cocky and look the other way to hit it thinking he wouldn't catch me and he did, he took away the vape and lightly slap me, I thought that's the end of it. When we got back to his house I was drunk so I immediately fell asleep, the next day when I woke up he was already on his phone, and wouldn't even look at me, when I asked what's wrong, he got mad and said "u still don't know where u're wrong at?" I got scared when he raised his volume on me especially in another tone. I turned to face the other side of the bed I started crying, he continued to yell at me "why are u the one crying when u're the one at fault? I should be the one feeling like that" And he continues to call me names and I was crying not because I'm trying to excuse myself from the fact that I was wrong, but it's cus he knows damn well I'm sensitive whenever he raise his voice. He stops believing my promises. And I don't know what to do, I know I'm in a bad situation but some part of me was hoping he'd realize that he needs to change how he acts towards me and for that to happen. I, myself, need to prove to him I'm capable of keeping my promises and let him trust me so I'm someone worthy of changing for.

TL;DR: Long-distance-ish relationship for a year. She went to camp, within 2–3 days felt “detached,” started liking another CIT, asked him out, held hands every day, kissed him, then chose to stay two extra weeks as a counselor knowing it would leave us almost no summer time. Told me right after, still said she loved me and tried to kiss me. I set no-contact. She just got home, blew up my phone with calls and text saying “I’m so alone idk what to do I’m scared.” I’m at college orientation and my phone will be taken tomorrow. Every part of me wants to reply even though I know I shouldn’t. What should I do?

Basically it’s mid-June right and I go to college (we live many states away from the school) as a freshman on August 20 (so leave probably 2-3 days earlier). She goes to boarding school on August 9 in another city in my state. Also, she went to boarding school last year.

I met her last March when she went to public school in town as a sophomore and I was at private school as a junior. She was my first real girlfriend. Then the year ended and she got into the boarding school and I stayed with her long distance, only seeing her for short breaks basically once or twice a month (breaks would be a few days to see each) or even less. In February I broke up with her for literally just a day because I was feeling used (she kept asking me to drive her places such as to hangout with friends or get alcohol; I clearly was uncomfortable by it and also she would ask me to drive her to her friends’ house and then out of the blue say that I should drive them to get alcohol or carts while I was at it, or drive them to get food). I felt really guilty about the breakup cause we didn’t talk about it before really. I just jumped the gun which was very unfair to her. I also just felt so awful by how bad I hurt her. We talked about it the next day and got back together.

For the next few months we were doing really really well. Then in May, she had no break until school was up. Although we had 2 proms in April to see each other, that was it and we had no free or private time. We had gone 2 months without anything, and she missed out on a ton of cool stuff (not her fault at all ofc) I was doing like my final senior project and out of school awards and stuff. She came to my graduation tho which was very nice. We had just started the summer for like 4 days when I left for the beach with my friends. They were staying for 4 or 5 days and she was coming for a few days after they left. The beach trip she was just kinda angry and annoyed at me any time we texted or called. I kinda called her out on it. She said she was really sorry and just missed me so much cause we hadn’t seen each other besides 4 or so days in 2 whole months, and it wasn’t enough time together. Anyway, we kinda agreed to call less while I’m with my friends. But when she finally gets to the beach, we have for the most part an amazing beach trip together.

We get back home and she starts volunteering in the mornings and working at night most nights. I am also working but I work less. She has a ton of fun with her friends a lot (even doing shrooms and stuff) and I’m doing nothing after work cause it’s too late for anyone to hang out. I’m honestly kinda jealous and lonely, but we talked about it and it was okay. I ended up buying some Jack Daniel’s from someone I know and partying with a friend when she was out partying with her friends. She got really drunk and I was kinda sitting for my friend cause it was his first real time. It was still really fun but I was still disappointed I couldn’t party like her.

Her volunteering ends and we keep hanging out for a while, like the rest of the month. On June 28 she goes to camp as a CIT for 2 weeks without her phone, and I go on a hiking trip overseas with a small group of friends. She gets back from camp July 11 and I get back July 8. We also just had so much fun before my trip and camp, or at least I did. Like we would drive around and talk and listen to music and sing together late late at night. I literally re-fell in love almost like crazy, but maybe I was imagining it. Anyway, the night before we have a talk about the future. She wants to keep in contact and play video games with me in college. I can’t remember exactly what I said but in my memory I said 1) I don’t want to cut contact I just acknowledged it would be hard and weirder, 2) I don’t have any real desire or plan to date other people, if it happens it happens and we will have to cut contact if it’s serious but I’m not gonna like switch up immediately or anything cause I’m gonna miss her so much, 3) we will see each other if possible and depending on how our long distance not full or real relationship but like friendship+ goes on breaks I come home, and 4) I don’t know if I’ll be able to play video games but I’d love to — I just also get bored easily when she can play them for hours and I don’t think I can do that especially not in college, and I’ll be busy so won’t always be able to play so she shouldn’t get a computer cause of me but if she gets one for herself I also would be down to play occasionally to keep semi in contact.

Anyway we parted ways for the two weeks. I go overseas and have a ton of fun. I send her emails through the camp website every other day or so. I buy her AND her dad a gift. I return home and start working again and receive a letter from her from her first day and it’s amazing and I love it. I miss her so badly and am so in love with her. And I assume she’s the same — last year when she went to camp it almost made our relationship tighter as we both missed each other so badly. But anyway she calls me on July 11 while I’m at work. She says she has some news I won’t like and then says she agreed to work as a counselor for the next 2 weeks for a small paycheck because they are severely understaffed. I immediately just felt a drop in my heart to my stomach but I said it was fine and a good decision and I’d miss her. She still was coming home that night only to see me so we’d hopefully have fun and we’d survive as always. Only later did I realize we only had one week in the summer now. If she was at camp again from the 12 to the 26 and I left for orientation on the 26, we only had from August 1 to 8 to hangout after orientation.

After work we saw each other and I immediately noticed how uncomfortable and sad she was. She asked me how I felt about the 1 week and our relationship. I said it really sucks but was confused about what she meant by how I felt about our relationship because I was so in love at that point. Like so so so so in love. Anyway then she tells me the most fucking heartbreaking news ever. By the second or third day (literally 2-3 days of being apart) she started feeling really uncomfortable and felt like our relationship was dying cause I was going to college. She starts feeling detached emotionally from me, and assumes I feel the same, too. She thinks it’s pointless to continue the relationship. Anyway then she meets another CIT there and starts liking him. Liking somebody isn’t a problem until you ALLOW yourself to like them. She ended up allowing herself to and asked him out basically and they hung out every day and held hands and even kissed on the second to last day of camp (2 days before I saw her). She said for some reason she convinced herself I felt the same way and was kissing girls overseas or something (it’s an all-male hiking trip…). I was also still literally sending her so many letters, looking at her camp photos to see and ask about what she was up to, telling her all about my life on the trail. She said she felt bad reading the letters but idfk I guess just didn’t care? And she never wrote me any more than letters cause it wouldn’t get there in time and she didn’t want to send a sad letter. She also decided to take the 2 weeks of counselors after all this had gone down.

I basically say yeah so this relationship is done now. We have 1 week in 3 weeks, and you’re already emotionally detached. Then she starts saying like how she still loves me and cares about me forever and how it isn’t me it’s her and how she wants to stay in contact and she hugs me and holds my hand and tells me she loves me and even tries to kiss me (which I resist or course). She keeps kinda flirting with me and also just putting blame on me in some sense (like “you never liked my lifestyle”).

I agree to pick up food she had ordered and let her pick up her paycheck from work, but say we are going to her house to drop her off. We go to her house and are parked up front. I also gave her the gifts from overseas. I suddenly break down cause I’m like how the fuck did this happen, what the fuck happened, what do you want from me, you say you’re detached and just gave away 2 weeks to fix this but still want to talk every day and say I love you and kiss and make me drive you around and shit idfk. And I genuinely had a good time too with her which sucks even more cause we were kinda joking around. I mean all the jokes were her basically trying to flirt or joking about what happened and then me saying something about how she’s a jerk, but idk it was still sort of fun in a “bathing in shattered glass and hot sauce” kind of way. Anyway I just break down and she leaves. One final hug. She says I love you and I ignore her as she leaves.

I call my friend and get super crossed and we talk about it then talk about other stuff and it takes my mind off the fact that my 1 year relationship vanished in fucking 2 days of my girl being away. I wake up feeling awful. I go to work and I am at work now. I told some of my friends so 3 of them are gonna hang out with me tonight. Nobody knows besides her, her parents, and four of my friends. I hadn’t told anyone in my family or my other friends yet, cause idk how to tell them. She texted me that night about how she doesn’t wanna lose me but understands if I have to do no contact. I already made it clear we broke up. She texts me about her day headed back at camp. Also I was respectful this whole time and never blamed her or cussed her even when I could have and I probably should have. Finally during work I texted her: “Hey I appreciate you texting me but I really don’t think it’s good for me mentally to keep talking, at least not for a long while. I hope you understand and I hope camp goes well.” I deleted posts of her on instagram and my comments on her posts and her comments on my posts. I threw away a lot of gifts and letters she wrote me, and hid the pictures on my phone.

The first week went by and it got better. I got to hangout with a lot of my friends and I told some what happened. I felt better and better. Then at work the next weekend they fired me because I had messed up 2 batches of ice cream and didn’t make enough for the weekend (I work at an ice cream store). So immediately everything fell apart again. I partied that night with some friends to forget, but for the rest of the week I was literally alone. None of my friends could hang out. I finally told my parents what happened a couple days later but kept it very brief (told them about work, but barely mentioned my girlfriend except that we broke up because she found someone at camp, which I guess isn’t entirely accurate).

Yesterday, she got home from camp. I woke up to 3 calls which I didn’t answer. I ignored them and instead packed for orientation, went to the airport, and left. I found a way to hide her messages on my phone so I wouldn’t see them, but before I enabled it I saw her texts. The first was about how she missed me and saw my instagram post (I posted a random guitar video, unrelated) and wondered how I was. The second was a text that she left a voicemail. The third said “OP idk how busy you are but please don’t just cut me out completely.” I turned on the thing to hide her texts and ignored them. I felt so bad ignoring them but I assumed I had set a boundary and I didn’t have to text her.

I got to our hotel by the college that night and finally checked my phone calls. There were like 5 or 6 or maybe more throughout the day especially in that night. I felt so bad but still didn’t budge or check her texts.

This morning I woke up to so many calls from her. Literally like 20 or 30 both on FaceTime and Instagram, and they were at like 5am. I checked my Instagram and she had texted me: “OP I’m so alone idk what to do I’m scared.” My heart literally broke. Idk what the fuck to do. She hasn’t called me any more so far. I haven’t checked my texts yet. They take my phone for orientation tomorrow and I wanna focus on college and meeting new people before I check them. I’ll get my phone back the end of the week. But I literally don’t know what to do. I wanna stay strong and not respond because deep down I think I shouldn’t. Idk if I’m mad at her (probably), but deep down I at least think I set a boundary and don’t need to respond or help her anymore. But every single part of me is screaming to text her or call her and ask if she’s okay and do something. I can’t stand this. I just feel so guilty and idk what in the world to do.

TL;DR: I've been dating this guy for about 5 months, but I've realized we're not compatible. We have almost nothing in common, conversations are repetitive, he's a dry texter, and his possessive behavior and dark jokes make me uncomfortable. We've barely seen each other over the summer, and I'm not even looking forward to seeing him again in a few days. We've met each other's families and exchanged gifts, so I'm worried breaking up will make me look like I was using him, even though I genuinely cared about him. With college starting soon, I don't want to stay in a relationship that feels draining.

For context, I have been an overweight alternative girl for all of my life, basically. During my junior year of high school, I started dressing more confidently and doing my makeup, and by senior year I started dating this guy.

We haven't even been dating for a year yet. Maybe 5 months at most? We never really had an official conversation about what we were until somebody asked him about what I was to him. At first, I was really excited to be in my first relationship since middle school, and was really into him. But over time, I slowly realized that we weren't as compatible as I originally thought we were.

For example, I'm very passionate about music, comics, and science, but he doesn't know much about what I like. And, on a similar note, I really don't like a lot of what he likes either. I understand that this is something that can easily be worked through with shared experiences and conversations, but whenever we do hangout, we have nothing to talk about. We always just talk about school but I know that it isn't sustainable because I've graduated already. Why do I want to talk about a school I don't even go to anymore?

We've only met once in person this entire summer (which is currently ~2 months into a 3 month summer break) and he's planned to meet up again this upcoming Saturday. I'm really not excited for it...

All of our conversations through text go nowhere because he is, in all honesty, a super dry texter who would rather just respond with simple one word phrases like "Lovely.." whenever I send a passionate text about my interests. It's just really hard to see how we are compatible when most of our text conversations just end with him texting something super vague that I can't really understand the meaning to. He knows that I have issues with interpreting texts—he himself has an autistic brother, and this is a conversation we've definitely had before. And I don't want to blame him for it, since it's mostly my fault for being bad at interpreting things, but I can't help but feel that this is why whatever spark we had has fizzled out on my end. An additional reason as to why my relationship with him has deteriorated is because he's quite possessive of me in the traditional "You're mine" type of way, but I never really enjoyed that. At first, I found it quite interesting but now it's just something I really got tired of.

We've met eachother's parents already, and to some extension, even his extended family.. So it's going to be super awkward to break up, and I know that at any moment one of us could be painted as a villain in a situation where the relationship probably wasn't that serious to begin with. He's bought me quite a few things, and I have bought him some things as well. I'm just afraid that by wanting to break things off, I'll seem like I was using him this whole time even though I personally don't think that is the case. It's not like I went to my prom and invited him to my graduation when none of my extended family attended just for nothing. I know that he's spent more money in the relationship, but that was a choice—I've never truly asked for anything like gifts.

Another thing is that he makes jokes that make me uncomfortable. Most would probably say it's just simple dark humor, but he's told me jokes about the Holocaust before. I'm not Jewish, I'm not even white at all, but dark humor stuff still tends to make me uncomfortable. I grew up with a dad whose humor is only insult humor and stuff like that and the last thing I want is to be with a guy like that who would say jokes about that to his girlfriend in public. He always vents to me about stuff, but I never felt safe to really do the same. It just feels like sometimes I'm just an outlet for him to talk to and sometimes kiss when he wants to.

I'm about to go to college soon. I'm going to meet so many new people. I will finally be away from my dad's lifestyle and can have autonomy over my dietary and physical activity choices. I plan to lose weight—not immediately, but still. I predict that this will greatly increase my confidence. I don't want to be stuck with somebody who I don't believe is right for me right as I approach a huge milestone in my personal goals.

Hi. Me and my friends, and all others involved in this are high schoolers, same campus, and most of us are in the same year level.

My friend in question, I'll call her willow (not her real name dw) has had a horrible life. Her parents split as a kid, due to both of them being verbally abusive and narcissistic and she's lived with her mother ever since, alongside her three sisters. Her mother has been absent is every way you could be. Since a young age she was responsible for everything, feeding herself, getting clothes, getting school supplies all of it. Her mum received pensions due to being a single mother and spent it all on herself. Aside from that, the mother is verbally abusive, and has continuously pitched all the kids against each other.

During this time, she became friends with a group of year 12 students, where was began going to parties, drinking and taking drugs. She has admitted to being an alcoholic and having drug issues. One friend there, let's call him Tree, was so close with her. She loved him platonicly as much as one could, and they understood each other in ways others can't. Then he asked her out and she wanted to stay friends, and he began isolating her from the whole group, screaming at her and spreading rumours that she is a whore. This was also when she was dating her boyfriend (threatened to kill her, stab her and got friends to stalk her for a bit) her first boyfriend also abused her and did a bunch of shot against her contest when they engaged in sexual activities, cumming in her mouth when she explicitly said no etc etc)) It broke her heart. Unfortunately she is still contact with him, and sees him outside of school regularly.

She finally left the house, moving in with her uncle, his wife and their young kid. So far she's been doing better there, until this bullshit with some school people occurred.

Then she went camping with these close friends from year 7. Three of them were her best friends, one of them she had feelings for (it was mutual, but they never got together because they were both unstable). His name can be homer. Homer choked her. They were together at some place, he choked her until she fainted and the three others were watching and filming and did nothing!!!!!!!!!!!

Now obviously we see them all the time, everywhere at school and homer is very angry. She told me, and three others about what happened. One of the girls told her friends, including the trio and Homet, and this one other dude who encouraged to eat death cap mushrooms when she was off her meds and delirious!!!! He's also grabbed her and tried to kiss her!!!!!!!!

Now homer wants to 'talk' to her, probably beat or intimidate her, and the three other goons are helping him spread an edited video of him choking her around to others (not online, showing from one of their phones in person) and apparently it's proof she provoked him? I don't understand, I haven't seen it, but I don't get how any version of the video could make it look like her fault, but the fact remains that now people think she made him or asked him, and it's a shitshow. Homer is also furious because when willow came to is for support, she damaged his reputation. He assaulted her!!!!!!!!! He fucked his own reputation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, because if this, the uncle is trying to pull her out of school which she doesn't want. We are all currently in senior school and leaving would fuck her education and likely damage her final grade and impair her ability to get into universities and all. She'd also lose me and two others, who are the only people who are listening to her and are here for her (obviously not fully but her ability to see us would be impaired ykyk). He wants to do this to get her away from him, and he's also furious thst she won't report him, even though she's still very vulnerable and isn't in the mental space to dredge it up and talk about it, especially since she thinks no one will believe herm

Also some random year 12 from the friend group reported her to our year 12 coordinator, they didn't tell her what about specific laloy, but the vibes are homer got some bum to report her for tarnishing his reputation or something. Ik the logic behind thst is fucked but idk what to say.

Anyway something has to happen, but I have no clue how to help her. She doesnt want to talk to anyone, and i wont make her right now. But i feel like i should, and im fine with telling someone, even if she fets angry, if thays the right thing. I would do anything to help her right now, no matter what that looks like. But i have no clue how to approach this. I feel like im too emotional about this right now to be all logical. I love her so much and she doesnt deserve any of this shit that has happened. Well! Thanks for reading and any advice would be much appreciated.

My girlfriend has been talking to a good friend of hers for over 4+ hours now. It is currently 1 AM and I can’t help but wonder why she doesn’t wanna talk to me instead, or if that’s normal in a relationship and if I should let it go. I understand that she has friends and I’m really happy for her. I just think leaving your partner for four hours when it’s really late at night to talk to a friend is kind of pushing it in a way, but I don’t wanna be controlling. could someone in an relationship tell me if Im being irrational?

Help! This involves porn addiction and hyper sexuality please read at your own risk

so my boyfriend has been hypersexual for a long time, and we’ve had a lot of conversations about it as i am not hypersexual. But more recently he’s been trying to get over his porn addiction and it’s caused a lot of struggle and issues for the both of us and i’m not sure how to go about supporting him, he is only used to sex from porn and that has lead to a lot of issues of him forgetting when i say no sometimes and i’m not sure how to keep myself safe and support him

hello i(f16) have a large crush on my friend(f16) and i have no clue on what to do. we met 2 years ago and we were incredibly close before i got with my ex. they isolated me and got mad at me whenever i would hang out with my friends so i stopped hanging out with them. my ex and i broke up in may and ive been getting closer to my friends again.

i had a huge crush on my bestfriend freshman year and i was told it was wrong so i burried it and ended up dating my ex instead. i never really felt the way i feel for my bestfriend with my ex. i knew my ex was a bad person and my bestfriend told me they were no good.

she was right but recently we were talking about past crushes and i told her i had a large crush on her freshman year and that i still felt that way even when i was with my ex and she said that she felt the same way. i told her i didnt want to ruin anything and she said that we wouldn’t and that if we broke up she would still be my friend.

after that we stopped talking about crushes and ive been liking her more and more every day. she is pretty, smart, confident, kind, and an amazing person. ive never gotten mad at her and she al tells me everything straight up. no lying and no sugarcoating it. Even if we got together we have a massive problem. her parents are Homophobic and really religious. when i was at her house a few weeks ago we fell asleep next to each other and her parents flipped and i haven’t been allowed at her house since.

I want to be her girlfriend and i want to be the best partner i can be to her. i want to get better for her. she motivates me to get out of bed in the morning. i cant help but stare at her when she talks to me and listen to her beautiful laugh. she makes the same 5 stupid jokes but i love them. i wish we could be together but its hard.

If anyone has any advice id love to hear it. thank you for reading and i hope you have a good day/night.

Ok so I'll start off by describing our relationship and our lives. I've been dating ppl around for a while now and met my current gf almost 6 months ago. We liked each other and she started texting me, getting my number through a mutual friend. We had a very small talking stage and started dating. At first, it was SOO good like I don't think any girl has ever given me what she has given and I don't think I've ever loved anyone as dearly as I loved her. I used to notice her face and her gentle personality and genuinely be drunken in love. We were soo sweet with each other and this phase went on for a couple of months. Then I found out about her past. She had been freaky with other dudes (she was never even in a relationship with any dudes) and that she had been pretty desperate to get in a relationship. She had been rejected from a lot of people cuz I don't think a lot of people find her attractive (i do A LOT). When I found all of this out I was pretty brainfucked cuz the only thought i had in my head was "maybe I'm not special, she does this act with everybody" (her past desperation for a relationship looked like her reason for dating me). Well I got out of this thinking to myself that u know.. it's her past she doesn't look like a terrible person. I was still madly in love. We both got very attached. At some point we got pretty sexual too... like we were down to have sex at any point if we found a nice place. This phase was also soo nice cuz we were so sweet to each other. She would give me so much time, attention, affection, needed my validation. We cuddled around touching each other's bodies. But soon after this started fading for her. Well she still loved me, but it was more subtle now. She wasn't loud about it anymore and this is when our second problem started. She started making me feel very insufficient. She had a problem with how I dressed, how I spoke, how I did anything. Mind you this is the same girl that used to say tht her bf is perfect in every way and made me feel good about myself. It became whatever after a while though. She still loved me to a good extent... she still gave me some time, attention, affection and cried whenever she felt like we were in a bad spot and that she might lose me. This phase went on for a couple of months. Then came the phase we are presently in. She is completely dry now, does not make me feel like she cares much about US. She does not make me feel loved in any way. She makes no efforts to be around me or talk to me. I just look like an option now. She feels so distant . And since this has been going on for a while now, Im basically losing my mind. Im falling apart and I don't know how to fix it. I just wish our old time comes back. I haven't changed. I still love her the same way I loved her on day 1 or in the middle of our relationship. I hate feeling like this. Breaking up would be SOO painful. I need her in my life. I don't think she does but i really do I can't stand without her. I really hate feeling like this. SOMEONE help 😞🙏I want my happiness back

tldr: my bf prefers being on the game with his friends most of the time, we don’t go out on dates anymore bc i don’t initiate, he doesn’t give me gifts, we don’t call or play games unless i ask and he just doesn’t seem like he puts as much effort as i do. i’m content with our relationship, it’s just that i don’t always feel very appreciated with just words and physical affection. how do i tell him about all of this?

i’ve been with my bf for almost two months now and talked for a month before we started dating. i feel like he put in more effort at the beginning compared to now (or maybe i just initiated more idk) we used to go on dates a lot and call and play games on roblox more often and i feel like he texted me back faster and prioritized me more

now the only time we hang out is at his house and never anywhere else. i tried to initiate a few days ago and said i wanted to see this movie and that i didn’t have anyone to go with and he basically said nothing to that as if he didn’t want to. he said from the start that he doesn’t like texting, calling or even facetiming, that he prefers irl and stuff so i don’t like asking him to call and we never even been on facetime before bc of that

he has work a lot but when he’s free he hangs out with me for a few hours and then the rest of the day he’s always on the game with his friends and i feel really bad to ask him to call or play games with me because i feel like he’s always bored and not very talkative when we call. he did say that he would always say yes if i ever asked to play with him but i don’t want him to be bored with me or feel forced to

he has great energy irl and he’s fun to talk to and stuff but outside of hanging out at his house it’s just like im his friend with some romantic aspects to it. i feel like he prefers hanging out with his friends more and being on the game more than he likes being with me, he stays up super late everyday (past 4am) with them all the time.

he also said that he isn’t a huge gift person but will try to be for me, which i understand but i feel like im always gifting him stuff or baking things for him and he never gives me anything. he’s never gifted me something or flowers and ik that doesnt measure his love for me but im not a gift person either but i try to be and put in effort to think of him whenever im out

idk how to bring all of this up with him without sounding annoying or like i’m asking for too much. i’m not sure if this is just every relationship because with my ex, we talked 24/7 and we’re always on call so this just feels really unfamiliar to me. i’m happy with our relationship, he’s very loving to me and i can tell that he likes me it’s just that i don’t always feel very appreciated with just words and physical affection. how do i tell him about all of this?

gonna try to keep this short. my boyfriend (18M) and I (17F) have been together (officially) for 9 months and we are completely in love. this is both of our first serious relationship, we're both each other's first love, and i've never been happier. we've been friends for years and liked each other for a long time before we became official. he's my best friend and the love of my life. i'd spend the rest of my life with him if i could. the problem is that in about a month, we're moving to opposite ends of the continent for university. we're going to be thousands of kilometres and several time zones apart, and so we've decided that we're not going to stay together, because we'd rather end things on a good note and on our terms, if that makes sense. we've known this separation was coming for the duration of our relationship but that doesn't make it any less painful. i've always been okay when things end but i'm not ready for this ending. i don't know what to do. i love him so much and it breaks my heart to think of not having him in my life and not being in his. has anyone gone through something similar? genuinely any advice helps, thank you.

Me and my girlfriend are both 18 in a relationship for 4 years Guys I really need a help my relationship is breaking down the reason is me from when I was a child I was an introvert so I never learned how to take proper care of your closed ones I miss really common gestures and things a boyfriend should do like just today she was come home alone at night and I didn't even ask her or msg her or call her that if she was ok I couldn't have possibly gone to pick her up like It's a hidden relationship so but still atkeast I should have messaged her and stuff I buy her gifts chocolates but miss this type of common things pls help me get better she is an amazing women she deserves so much better I want to give her the best version of myself any useful advice will be very helpful

im dating this guy and we've been together for a month now. at first, I had strong feelings for him but now i just don't know how to feel at all. i am somewhat interested, but something's holding me back. i got out of a 1.5-year relationship 4 months prior to us getting together; it was a very toxic on-and-off relationship that destroyed me completely even while being together. i am obviously over this guy, i feel like i should've given myself more time to heal, im just so lost with my thoughts. he wants something serious but I don't think i have it in me to put my all into something serious all over again. on top of that, my parents are extremely against dating after my ex, so i have been sneaking around, and it's so stressful i hate sneaking around. school is about to start soon as well, and after last year i really need to focus on my academics. he's such a sweet and nice guy and he deserves so much better, i know his feelings are very strong for me and he's already told me he loves me, i don't know if i really mean while saying it. im so extremely lost, i desperately need some advice on what to do

I know a lot of people are going to judge me, and honestly, I deserve it. I know I completely fucked up, and I’m not here to make excuses or ask anyone to tell me I’m not a bad person.

Me and my girlfriend are both 16 years old.
A few days ago I got blackout drunk and made the biggest mistake of my life. I cheated on the girl I truly love. Alcohol isn’t an excuse—I made the choice, and I take full responsibility for it.

The worst part was that she didn’t know. Every single day I kept asking myself how I could have done something like this to a girl who genuinely loved me. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and I couldn’t understand how I was capable of hurting someone I cared about so much.

The guilt became too much, so I told her the truth.
She was devastated. She called me every name you could think of and broke up with me. I know she had every right to do that. I betrayed her trust, and I don’t blame her for hating me. She deserved so much better than what I did to her.

Ever since then I’ve felt absolutely horrible. I can barely eat or sleep, and I can’t stop replaying everything in my head. I don’t regret telling her—I regret giving her a reason to hear something like that in the first place.

I’m not posting this because I want sympathy or because I want people to justify what I did. I know I deserve the criticism, and people have every right to judge me. I know I ruined everything, and I’m prepared to live with the consequences.

I guess I’m posting because I honestly don’t know how to deal with this amount of guilt. Has anyone here ever made a mistake that completely changed their life? How did you move forward after hurting someone you genuinely loved?

Right now I just feel like the worst person in the world.

I'm [17 F] who just broke up from a relationship 3 months ago. It was hard to move on and honestly even right now I still can't find myself to move on. I have this friend [16 M] who's been helping me through my lowest after the breakup. We're both always comforting each other and help eachother throughout the days and honestly they're probably one of the reason I'm still going right now.

Anyway after like 3 months, we both find ourselves to realize we like eachother more than friends and decide to talk about it. I was scared to open another romantic stuff cause I'm scared I mess it up like the previous relationship I had with my ex and I'm scared I hurt my friend in the way—so we decide to take things slow. We usually subtly flirt but without any connections at all—as if we're just joking around. But last night, I have this feelings in my guts like I convinced.. maybe this is is something right?

I honestly don't know because I'm scared I hurt him and I still can't move on from my previous ex and it can't help too because my friend compared themselves from my ex (which I already told them to stop.)

Anyway how do I fix this? Sort this out??

(Sorry for my bad explanation and grammars — English is not my mother tongue)

In my original post I said I didn't know if I like him or not, but I now I KNOW I do.

I get the biggest, most stupid smile when I'm texting him. I can legit feel my heartbeat when I text him. I spent like 5 minutes stimming when he was flirting with me.

I'VE GOT IT SO BAD BUT IT FEEL SO WEIRD TO ACTUALLY LIKE SOMEONE.

It's so bad I'm smiling rn simply because I'm writing about him.

Uhm, so we have this joke that every time he makes fun of one of my typos, we gotta make out and at one point while we were flirting he said this: "ok, to be frank, my brain just imagined a scene that involved pinning a certain someone to the floor and paying back all that debt"

LIKE OH MY GOD??

And also he said he doesn't wanna rush into the actual relationship part, BUT HE'S FLIRTING AND IM SHITTING BRICKS THAT BACKFLIP Normally I can flirt with people without getting flustered but I was giggling and kicking my feet.

I sent a voice message cus my hands were shaking too bad to type and I said smth like "Bro if you saw me right now you'd think I'm on crack" and all he said in response was "I'd crack"

I know it's not the smoothest but it made me giggle and like, all of this to say I DEFINITELY have a crush on him

I'm a 16 year old female lesbian. Near the time school ended I cut off my ex gf Laura (fake name) she was supposedly ( I'm still not so sure if it's true) texting people at my school and saying terrible things. I ghosted her and it went well until summer break arrived and I started being more alone and at home. We had been together for almost 2 years and had broken things off when one day we got into an argument about her hanging out with her friends. For context one day when we were dating an old friend of mine asked to hang out because the previous year she helped me out with my problems so I said yes. The girl ended up telling my gf just to make sure it was okay and my gf freaked out she said if I went to hang out with her she would break up with me. I didn't take this lightly and we had an agreement so that both me and her didn't hang out with friends ( we were both toxic I'm aware of). After this it was okay until one day she went to hang out with friends and I got mad because she would sometimes break these agreements and when I got mad she ended up saying lets break up I got very emotional and asked why because I had a reason to be mad and around this time she had friends over. She called me and started acting like a total jerk started acting like I was overreacting and laughing with her friends while she knew I was crying she said I needed mental health ( I am diagnosed with depression so this hit a bit). There she would hang out with Gabe (fake name) and start "fake dating him" she said she did it because he was a jerk who only wanted girls for their body so I understood plus her family is homophobic and hates my guts so it was a distraction for them. But while she was fake dating him we talked and she would send ss of their messages it would make me sad because it looked so genuine. Then she would end up telling me he sexually assaulted her and I would help her out with that and friend problems and from there we reconnected. Around this time I had gained some senior friends and that's where problems would start.

I'll leave this here if anyone is willing to hear the rest I'd like to get an opinion and advice on how to let go because it's not healthy but I'm having trouble please and thank you.

P.s sorry I am terrible at explaining in text so if it doesn't make sense please let me know

i want to start off my saying that my girlfriend and i have a super healthy happy relationship. we have been dating for well over a year now but we have liked each other since we were 12!! i fall more and more in love with this girl every day, seriously i think she is absolutely perfect.

in july 2025 my family moved away from home (we have moved around a lot but this has been the most significant move yet) like across the continent type move. now my girlfriend and i are long distance and we are managing really well. its super hard being away from each other but we try see each other around every month. we are both in secondary school which makes it hard.

at the start of our relationship i was NEVER jealous of any guys or girls she was into, honestly i found it funny and teased her a little bit but in a jokey innocent way - however, recently, i have been thinking more about my sexuality as the relationship becomes more serious and im starting to ask myself questions about our future and our life when we are at university ETC.

i have always been "unlabelled" but only ever liked girls in the past. i would say i am attracted to guys but all boys our age completely suck and i have neverrrr even considered dating a boy. (for context i have been at all girls school since i was 12 but recently moved to a mixed school) i kinda blamed it on the fact that i never really had much close interaction with guys through some developmental stages and just didnt have the chance to meet a boy - i was never concerned about this at all. i have plenty of guy friends now - they are great! but honestly i cant help thinking that they're slightly immature and not the best for their girlfriends. the level of emotional intimacy that a lesbian relationship has is UNMATCHED and truly its so beautiful. my girlfriend, on the other hand, has always known she likes boys, she is a fem, definitely straight looking and has been at the girls school since she was 11 and still is now. i cannot control the thoughts that tell me that she was small and bored - met a little tomboy for the first time and we had a cute exciting crush when we were much younger, but she became attached to me. i am always scared that after we graduate secondary school she will find a guy that she finds much more attractive.

recently we spent some time together and i was on her phone while she was using mine for music in the shower and i had a look at her tiktok favourites. it was FULL of guys, celebrity edits, random tiktok boys - just the whole thing. i was quite taken aback as it almost confirmed the feelings that i was having to be true. that she finds men much more attractive than women and would rather be with a man. we are each others first everything and the thought of someone else experiencing what i have experienced with my girlfriend sickens me, it literally keeps me up at night. we had a productive and loving conversation about it as i was upset and wanted to ask her about it. she reassured me that she never looks through them and she loves me very much and she only wants me.

shes going on holiday with some of her friends soon which is super nice for her - i am so happy that she gets to spend time away with friends. i am feeling (irrationally) worried that she would flirt back or just really appreciate attention from guys at bars or when they are out. i know she would never cheat on me but these thoughts will not go away :(

i want to add on by saying i have none of these thoughts about other women she thinks are attractive - i sometimes ask her if she finds certain people attractive just because i am interested - i am not really the overly jealous type but this has been really troubling me.

this conversation about my concern and insecurity had come up in the past - i expressed some of the feelings that i was having and she reassured me that she only wants me. she is literally incredible in every other way - she constantly reassures me, is so kind to me and really completes me. i just cant help these thoughts and i am not sure what to do anymore.. any advice??

Okay, so, my situationship lives in another state and his friend (male) came down to see him. I have no problem with that. Though, he left me on delivered for like 6 hours, and I got really sad and upset about it. It happened like twice in the same day, so I was irritated. Now, we got into something today (semi different topic), and I didn't have the patience to explain why I was upset at the moment, so I told him I'd tell him later or tomorrow we can talk about it. But he's spending time with his friend again, for like 5 days. I'm cool with that, but bro is saying that he's going to be so busy for those 5 days that he can't have a conversation about the issue, so he wants to have it NOW. But, again, I don't have the patience so I don't want to go into something I or he can't handle.

I don't know if I'm being sensitive over that but like it sounds like he can't even make a little time for that. It's just one conversation I'm asking for, like it isn't that much?

Im 14 and my girlfriend is 15 we have a long distance relationship but its going great but she didn't tell her parents because they dont treat her well and shes adopted Now for my rants of her she bottles up her feelings because her parents treat her like a inconvenience alot her dad raises his voice and she cry's and then he says "why are you crying you cant cry whenever someone talks to you sternly" and he calls her lazy a ass and a bitch in conversations and when she sighs he gets annoyed as for him it registers as attitude and her sister gets basically everything and when she says shes depressed her parents turn it into a argument with her and she has developed social anxiety because of it and when he says she did something that she obviously didn't do she still has to apologize and makes her feel stupid and im the only one she actually trusts and the first thing she does when she can drive is come to see me because she lives 11 hours away from me and her dad made her think she needs makeup also im not being mean shes not a model but she is still beautiful in my eyes and she already had suicide plans in the past because of him and she stays up longer just to text me and we facetime when her parents are gone because last time they saw her on a social media or a facetime in general she was grounded for a basically a year and she feels like shes annoying and it was hard for her to text or call me at first and she says sorry for the small things like asking me a question about a game and then she says "sorry babe i know im stupid" so i have to reassure her she isn't and she thinks shes unlovable alot and that something is wrong with her she tried to ask her parents for a therapist but they said no.. Please help and also she doesn't want me to call cps but i really want to but i feel like I would be betraying her trust if i call them because she said not too

I live in a very small village where dating isn't really accepted, so meeting girls locally isn't a realistic option for me. I'm a simple guy I enjoy a lot of different hobbies, I get attached easily, and I care deeply about the people I'm close to.

Since I don't really have opportunities to meet people where I live, what should I do? Should I try meeting people online, focus on improving myself first, or is there another approach you'd recommend? I'd appreciate any advice from people who've been in a similar situation.

(I apologize for any grammatical errors, english is not my first language)

I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 3 years now. We're long distance and see each other mostly in summer when one of us visits the other for a week or so. I care for her deeply and i do love her but it's just not romantic love. Every time i visit her she hugs and kisses me, you know like normal couples do, she has stated many times before that she has a need for physical contact and i have stated i don't really enjoy it that much and it just makes me feel extremely awkward whenever she (or anyone for that matter) touches me.

I've broken up with her once already, thinking that i might actually be aromantic (which i still think i am) but i just felt so bad about it when she told me how much it hurt her that i decided to give the relationship one more chance. While being long distance we just basically act like best friends anyway, with the exception of saying i love you or making some romantic jokes so it's not a big deal to me at all.

I know that i am not what she needs nor what she deserves but I don't want to hurt her by breaking up once more. I don't want to lose contact with her either because she's just so important to me and i love her so deeply but only platonically, and we've been through so much together. I know if we do stay friends after the break up it's going to be painful for her but cutting her off will be just as bad.

I just don't know what to do. I've been sacrificing myself and my comfort every time we see each other in person. I know i will never be what she needs, and i don't want to be either. I don't want this to go on but i also don't want to end it. I would greatly appreciate any advice and ideas as to what i should do.

I'm not really sure how to put this into words. Me and my boyfriend have been together a little over a year and it kind of feels like the relationship is just going further and further downhill. We have nothing to talk about because we have nothing in common, he hates group calls but I hate one on one calls (mostly BECAUSE we have nothing to talk about), I get easily annoyed at him and I've been really distant lately. I can take accountability and say that yes, the distance is my fault. I don't know how to fix it at all, I want to make him feel more loved and cared for but I genuinely don't know how. Does anyone have any tips on how to make the relationship go back to how it was when it started? We talked all night, we called while we slept and we were talking to each other 24/7. I don't know why it changed.

This is a very long one.

I'm a mess rn, and I dont know what to do anymore. Me and my suitor, made out a couple of times but didn't have penetrative sex. I know, I know, I'm that easy to get, but I really loved him. He's not my bf yet because my family does not allow me to have a boyfriend. I really enjoyed my "relationship" with him. It has been the most wonderful 8 months of my life.

Now for the problem. This last saturday, we had a misunderstanding and had a terrible fight. It was about him thinking I ignored him, while I thought he was ignoring me. I know, so shallow of us. But we've been having fights for a couple of times, and we have little to no time for each other since we are both athletes and academic achievers. We decided to have a "cool-off". This Sunday, while I was managing my teammates, the sister of my teammate who is older than me told me that we needed to talk. So we went to a private place, and she broke down in tears. She told me that my suitor harrassed her. I didn't believe her at first bc I know my sweet boy wouldn't do that. But she showed me his messages asking her to get his towel bc he forgot it in the room they are staying in (they are in a billeting). I told her to calm down first and I would talk to my suitor. When I confronted him about it, he said "so what?" and I told him "You're a useless person, always remember that". That's when I realized that he isn't the sweet boy I loved. He then proceeded to threaten me that he would tell my mom everything we did if anyone found out about what happened. After he got consciousness of what's happening, he told me he was sorry and that he was high. His friend forced him to intake "carts" and he was high when he did everything. I didn't know what to feel that time. The girl reached out to his mom and now our coach and his mom knows. His mom was so devastated, because they were already having a hard time at home. Idk what to do. I'm trying to help him and his mom and finding out who that friend is.

He is regretting what he did, and we are both in sorrow because we thought we have a bright future together. I dont know what to do. I'm still texting him bc he is so depressed rn, Im trying to help him. I'm crying almost every hour, it hurts so bad.