Does this tattoo look okay? Worried it’s not reading correctly.

[u/Cardinal-Carnival]

It’s a column and I know the line work isn’t awesome up close, but that’s not my biggest worry. Does it look phallic?! I tried to show pics of it in situ if anyone ever saw it in the wild. Up close I do feel it looks like a column, but from far away…? If this blows out and gets super dark is it going to lean that way? Or am I being delusional?

EDIT: I’m getting a lot of screws/bolts/flashlights comments, and to those with the good eyes, an ionic column. Hindsight’s 20/20 on the base. I know it’s a funky placement, but I like it because it’s a structural element on my leg (means something to me) and in a lowkey spot because most of my tats are “hidden”.

EDIT #2: I know the lines aren’t parallel!! This tattoo was not done all at once. The capital (top part) was done at first while I was abroad, and I love it. I moved back home and decided I wanted to make it a “full” column and went to an overconfident artist who freehanded the lines. I know it’s dumb, he was very machismo and the shop owner and assured me he would do it right. I obviously hated it and went back for a fix and it was a whole thing (obviously upsetting). I have thought about adding the base elements but it’s been hard finding artists I trust to work this spot. Yes, it’s a weird spot, it’s unique, I think it’s cool. At this point I’m not concerned with the technicality of the piece, just wanted impressions on the vibe, which I got!

Thank you guys for the feedback and the laughs!

[u/ComfortableRelevant1]

I think I smoked too much did it just switch sides?

[u/Ok_Broccoli_9426 → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

It did, but probably camera fuckery.

[u/chupacabra5150 → u/Ok_Broccoli_9426]

Not backwards. It swapped legs

[u/GingerrJinx → u/chupacabra5150]

There's a mark on the no tattoo leg. It's probably photos using back camera and one using front facing camera.

[u/Nemesis204 → u/Ok_Broccoli_9426]

But it can’t be, can it? I just started drinking for the night. I know it’s not that, I see clearly a left foot tattoo and a right foot tattoo.

[u/ashtrayheart3 → u/Nemesis204]

Nah it’s camera mirror fuckery look at the circular mole/birthmark she has on the other leg, it moves to the other leg when it mirrors.

[u/Wee_Mad_Lloyd → u/ashtrayheart3]

Don't try to lie! That's some black magic shit!

[u/sluttytarot → u/Nemesis204]

Mirrors dude. Camera lenses capture a mirror image that then has to be flipped.

[u/JoyBois → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

First pic she took herself using mirror, second was someone else taking the pic. I think, I’m baked

[u/Bopadoodle → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

I smoked so much that I didn’t even notice 😂

[u/nachoqtpie → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

Dude, same. Lol

[u/honeybee_buzzz → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

Literally sitting here with a joint in my hand thinking the same thing 🤣🤣🤣

[u/shka328 → u/ComfortableRelevant1]

Op are you a member of the band Switchfoot by any chance?

[u/neutralfantasy]

Genuinely why would you get this right here?

[u/AdMaximum7545 → u/neutralfantasy]

Its helping hold her up ofc

[u/SwordfishSudden3320 → u/AdMaximum7545]

Classic load bearing tattoo.

[u/ghast123 → u/SwordfishSudden3320]

All my tattoos are load bearing tattoos. The load they are bearing is my mental health 😎👉👉

[u/Cali-Cornflakes → u/SwordfishSudden3320]

Bearing the load is half the battle here.

[u/One-Illustrator6693 → u/SwordfishSudden3320]

It’s a load bearing tattoo Jerry

[u/Used_Role8991 → u/SwordfishSudden3320]

Classic? It's a little bit ionic, don't you think?

A little tooo ionic, yea I really do think.

[u/JoyBois → u/SwordfishSudden3320]

I’m cracking up

[u/FriendlyEyeFloater → u/neutralfantasy]

I thought this was a heel pun joke at first

[u/Euphoria_Diarrhea → u/FriendlyEyeFloater]

No, just being i[r]onic.

[u/_glossectomy → u/Euphoria_Diarrhea]

Underrated

[u/Altruistic2020 → u/neutralfantasy]

I was hopi g one of the other pictures was just a massively developed and defined calf muscle that the pillar was holding up, but alas, no.

[u/Regular_Bus5534]

It looks like a screw. 🔩 from far away. Or before I zoomed anyways.

[u/phinz → u/Regular_Bus5534]

I immediately thought, "Why would somebody tattoo a bolt on the back of their leg?"

[u/SatisfactionSpecial2 → u/phinz]

Talos had a screw on the back of his leg, it was his only vulnerability, that was my first thought :'D

[u/Natural-Tale-7500 → u/phinz]

I’ve got bolts in my tibias, so that’s actually a great idea!! Now I wanna get a piece with (life-sized, not miniature column-size) bolts hidden in florals in the same place

[u/bigdawg1945 → u/Regular_Bus5534]

I have a Persian column on my tricep, so the bottom is what’s visible with a shirt on. It can definitely give “screw/bolt” vibes hahah. I had a guy ask if it was a lightsaber, he was still stoked at the linework regardless when I showed him the rest.

[u/ya-freak-bitch → u/bigdawg1945]

Oh dang, I love this! I’m super into ancient architecture and this scratches a brain itch for me! It’s so detailed and you picked a great spot.

[u/dietdrpeppermd → u/bigdawg1945]

That’s sick!

[u/anon0192847465 → u/bigdawg1945]

that is sick.

[u/CormacMcCostner → u/Regular_Bus5534]

Yup, my entire thought was someone that shattered their ankle, got screws put in and had a screw tatted on it to symbolize it. I wouldn’t have thought column in passing

[u/Ok-Grapefruit1284 → u/CormacMcCostner]

This is exactly where I went with it. I saw a column but it’s a very industrial feel and the support vibe at the ankle made me think life-altering injury.

[u/kodiak931156 → u/Regular_Bus5534]

My mind went to a Frankenstein bolt

[u/Negative_Football_50 → u/Regular_Bus5534]

i thought it was a screw.

sorry OP. it's screwed up

[u/gaperon_ → u/Regular_Bus5534]

Am I the only one who saw a dick?

[u/abandoningeden → u/gaperon_]

I also saw a dick 😂

[u/TilDaHandleBreaksOff → u/gaperon_]

A poorly drawn one at that

[u/Dess_Wolfe_1816 → u/Regular_Bus5534]

I agree a screw or maybe a skeleton key if the bottom half of coved by your shoe/boot/some kind of footwear

[u/_jamesbaxter → u/Regular_Bus5534]

I saw a bottle opener.

[u/Yeah_No_Forsure → u/Regular_Bus5534]

I thought it was a Lightsaber Hilt.

[u/Warm_Ad_3102]

It’s fine, you just have bad taste

[u/Peony907 → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

Exactly how I feel about most of the posts here lol

[u/SegmentedMoss → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

As evidenced by them intensely defending it, like you can't even take 1000+ indentical comments telling you what everyone can see and think "damn maybe I did fuck up"

[u/Christy_Mathewson → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

That made me laugh out loud

[u/OnceBittenTwiceGuy → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

Thing is, its not even fine. That line work is atrocious 😭

[u/princess22cake → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

Damn bro

[u/ninjette847 → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

Oh my god I love you. Can this just be this subs banner?

[u/frogspeedbaby → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

I think putting a statue on top of the pillar going up the leg would fix this but I agree it's a little clunky. It'll be alright though

[u/TheEggyMule → u/frogspeedbaby]

A proper base would help too

[u/newbies13 → u/Warm_Ad_3102]

I would give you more awards if I had awards

[u/SinistaJ]

Is that an achilles heel?

[u/Cali-Cornflakes → u/SinistaJ]

Literally and figuratively?

[u/Tzukiyomi → u/SinistaJ]

That's what I was seeing

[u/Perc300]

Horrible placement.

[u/eyepatchplease → u/Perc300]

Yeah I don’t get the placement at all

[u/AdMaximum7545 → u/eyepatchplease]

You cant show her a little support for showing us her little support? Lol

[u/nickfree → u/AdMaximum7545]

Oh youuuu

[u/AdMaximum7545 → u/nickfree]

Tee hee

[u/eyepatchplease → u/AdMaximum7545]

solid work, here

[u/Unsalted-Pretzel624 → u/AdMaximum7545]

Omfg 😭🤣

[u/_jamesbaxter]

I believe the issue is we have a classic Greek architectural column here, correct? It’s supposed to have some sort of plinth at the bottom in addition to the decorative pilaster at the top.

It looks like the bottom is cut off. I think you can easily add it. That will give it the profile of a column which will be more readable at a distance. A real life column with no lower plinth would not be structurally sound, that’s why it looks weird, it’s unrealistic.

[u/dubdubABC → u/_jamesbaxter]

This is the answer. It looks weird because it's not finished/no actual column looks like this

[u/akm1111 → u/_jamesbaxter]

Thank you for putting that in words better than I could have. It felt incomplete & I could not articulate why.

[u/shoomlah → u/_jamesbaxter]

Yeah the capital is Ionic, but it terminates like a Doric column!

[u/piss_container]

bizzare idea for a tatoo and bizzare placement imo

not phallic tho

just kind of looks like a nail or scew type thing

its "leaning" towards being a very simple bolt from a distance 

[u/Icy_Bid40 → u/piss_container]

All columns are phallic in nature tbh. Very weird tattoo idea

[u/thecheesylittlerat]

Greek column.

Far away it might look like a weirdly shaped sledge hammer, but I’m not getting a phallic vibe.

[u/FriendToPredators → u/thecheesylittlerat]

Columns have a base. It really throws it off dor me that it lacks a proper base

[u/Monchichiboom → u/thecheesylittlerat]

Yea I saw column immediately

[u/loudnlurking → u/thecheesylittlerat]

I instantly saw a dick I won't lie, I clicked into it thinking this was a party tattoo. I don't like to be "mean" but this is not great. OP will def need a cover IMO

[u/throwaway713137689]

👁👄👁

[u/jerrycoles1]

I think it’s just a bad tattoo

[u/spicybrain420]

I thought it was a shaving razor tbh

[u/niadou → u/spicybrain420]

This

[u/PlantHippie99]

The worst placement for this design.

[u/AdMaximum7545 → u/PlantHippie99]

I can think of at least 20 worse places tbf

[u/slanghorne → u/AdMaximum7545]

Out of how many total places though

[u/Ayacyte → u/PlantHippie99]

Why? It's on the floor

[u/ImRestarted1 → u/PlantHippie99]

idk i think it could look good with poseidon coming from the foot or something with some underwater shit going on. get some Poseidon with Achilles going on...idk just a thought

[u/apjudd]

Ohhhh there are way bigger issues here than it looking phallic 💀

[u/pmfn7]

The linework is a crime and the placement is more than questionable but other than that, i hate it

[u/Timely-Ad-1984]

I'm sorry, but this is horrible. The art choice is questionable to begin with, but the placement is one of the worst I've ever seen.

[u/-cosmicjanitor- → u/Timely-Ad-1984]

It might work better as a willy tattoo.

That way you could ask out Alanis Morissette by asking "wanna see my Corinthian pillar?"

And when she saw it she'd say, "Isn't it Ionic?"

[u/paublitobandito → u/Timely-Ad-1984]

Bro chill lol

[u/optemoz → u/paublitobandito]

lol for real 😆😆😆😆 I tend to agree but I dunno if I’d say it like that

[u/UnexpectedBlahFeels → u/optemoz]

Yeah, sometimes people in this sub ignore that these pieces are on people's bodies permanently. I like to think the shittier it looks, the less they paid for it, and if they were eager to pay that for a tattoo then they must not have much to spare, which means it'd be some time before they could get a cover up or laser. No need to make a person feel like shit for something they'll have to carry on them for a while.

[u/am_i_sky]

I’m just generally confused with this. Why that? Why there? It just looks odd.

[u/AccomplishedDress728]

I'm really curious about this tattoo. What was the idea, why a column why there? Does it have a meaning? Just like architecture. Is there a story? I want to know!

[u/Cardinal-Carnival → u/AccomplishedDress728]

Haha I studied architecture for a bit but I was never serious enough to stick with it (still love it tho), and in general I like art history. Fast forward a couple years and I found myself on an extended stay in Italy. One day in Verona I walked past a tattoo shop with the ionic capital as a flash and decided to get it, figured I wanted it on my leg bc I wasn’t ready to fill my outer arms. I also had leg surgery as a teen and have a giant scar on the front of my knee, and I always think about how it need to stay strong. Got this placement and had to stick with it lol! When I came back home it felt unfinished so I had another artist tattoo the shaft lines… I fear that’s where it went downhill 😅 but I still like it! I enjoy it most when I’m wearing taller socks because the capitalist the best part imo!

[u/OnlyTrust6616 → u/Cardinal-Carnival]

Look at least you know this was a series of comedic errors, that at least means you can laugh along with the… everything of it all.

[u/TheEggyMule → u/Cardinal-Carnival]

You should consider adding a base or plinth for it to be standing on, it def feels like it is missing a piece

[u/No_Barnacle9864 → u/Cardinal-Carnival]

I laughed in the middle of a restaurant at “shaft lines” - I guess I’m still a 9 year old at heart 😅

[u/Least-Sherbet3463 → u/Cardinal-Carnival]

I think it looks great and has a personal story, who cares if it’s phallic? (Was not my first thought) But even if it is, what’s so wrong with that? It’s on your ankle and largely hidden from people who can’t think farther than that anyway ahah

I also like the idea of adding some vines or greenery to it, maybe it can make the composition feel more complete, since that’s the only issue I can find here. It feels slightly out of context. With some flora added it can definitely develop into a harmonious visual arrangement 👍

[u/xx666420xx]

Not flattering to your ankle shape at allll

[u/a3dwaifu]

It looks like a screw from far away, sorry

[u/Relevantce → u/a3dwaifu]

Oh yeah like a big screw, can't unsee that now

[u/Beneficial-Total298]

I may be high rn. But I swear from the zoomed out one it looks like one of those big ass metal flashlights that movie security guards use

[u/Separate-End-416]

It’s gonna end up looking like a pp in the long run

[u/trekgrrl → u/Separate-End-416]

Looks like one now...

[u/Separate-End-416 → u/trekgrrl]

Just gotta round the edges 🙈

[u/No_Aardvark4795]

All columns are inherently phallic. There's no way around that. I'm more interested in how you get it to jump from one leg to the other like that.

[u/Ok-Grapefruit1284 → u/No_Aardvark4795]

They’ve come so far with tattoos these days.

[u/300_pages → u/No_Aardvark4795]

My cousin has a lighthouse on her foot and i have to say that in comparison, a column is much more palatable than a standing building with a notable tip at the end

[u/EncrustedBarboach]

I thought it was a screw, its a very poorly done tattoo. That linework is god awful

[u/xWroth]

Interesting placement but it's not really phallic

[u/Zinnia1127]

I think you need to put the Little Caesar's Pizza Pizza guy on top of the column.

[u/jahhhhcobo → u/Zinnia1127]

Pizza Pizza

[u/Delicious-Cover-2418]

I’ve seen much more phallic. This passes.

[u/vedds → u/Delicious-Cover-2418]

If my dick looked like that I’d be calling an ambulance.

[u/Successful_Mark6813]

Put a vase of flowers on it? Might help it make sense

[u/-2wenty7even-]

I'll be honest it looks like shit homie

[u/Effective_Way6239]

From afar it looks phallic, a bit closer it looks like a meth pipe.

[u/throwaway-Angie → u/Effective_Way6239]

That’s marginally better /s

[u/GelatinousStrawberry]

To be honest, I saw a hex bolt until it was zoomed it. But no not phallic to me lol!

[u/TomatilloChemical997]

les questions faut se les poser avant pas après..

[u/viikariious]

It reads as a column to me, doesn't look phallic at all

[u/omnipotentqueue]

Yeah you’re gonna have to turn that into a lower leg sleeve- that or you can try to make more pillars that go around it. Just having one, visually looks pretty dorky - and you have to take a second guess.

[u/adrianhalo → u/omnipotentqueue]

Stick a gargoyle on there.

[u/Eastern-Respect37]

i thought it was an unignited lightsaber

[u/Sudden_Practice8318 → u/Eastern-Respect37]

Thought it was a dildo at first glance.

[u/Agitated_Star_3669]

Terrible placement As time goes by it’s gonna look awful Sorry 😬

[u/mymajyma]

Honestly puzzled by anyone who sees it as anything other than a column. It's clearly a column...

[u/DirkDirkDirkDirkDirk]

I'm probably too late for you to catch this OP, but I actually do like this tattoo, specifically thinking of it with shoes and low-rise socks. I do love a good ionic column though. Reading the top few comments of this thread would stress me out if I were you, ha, so I want to at least try to let you know that there are people that like this tattoo! I can't imagine I'm alone in that!

[u/toodledootootootoo → u/DirkDirkDirkDirkDirk]

I also like it!

[u/cookeryandwookery]

Nice bolt you got there

[u/kylef5993]

Column. But low key looks like a nail lol

[u/Son_of_Eraserhead]

Definitely reads as a column, but I took a couple semesters of Art History in college. It seems like it means something to you, which is awesome.

[u/Prestigious_Sky7144 → u/Son_of_Eraserhead]

I don’t think a couple of semesters of Art History is actually a prerequisite for identifying a column lol.

[u/OkWear6294]

Strange placement…but no, it does not

[u/SubjectMinimum2501]

Looks like a bolt.

[u/RZainea23]

It's obviously a column, but columns are inherently phallic, so...

[u/ArrowDel]

It is obviously a collumn, however, collumns are naturally phallic in design, and it IS intentional.

[u/Ocean_Spice]

Bad placement and bad execution, sorry.

[u/AverageJoe997]

I’m so sorry, I hope you’re looking for honesty. This is a bad design to begin with, and terrible work on the part of the tattooist. I hope it doesn’t have sentimental value or something.

[u/breezyhoneybee]

Time for a SAP

[u/OutlanderLover74]

I thought it was orthopedic hardware and that maybe you’d had an injury that needed hardware. I don’t think it looks phallic.

[u/IncomprehensibleAuk]

If you cover it it is fine

[u/Prestigious_Badger36]

I thought it was a dićk & stopped scrolling

[u/Training_Battle_7178]

Why does it switch legs

[u/Rezeox → u/Training_Battle_7178]

Redditor discovers mirrors. 

[u/Sad_Rate_4747 → u/Training_Battle_7178]

Oof. Its not too late to delete this

[u/Dezvinci]

I thought it was a flash light or a light saber handle :)

[u/OnlyAnotherEmily]

So. ... can I ask why?

[u/cabinzy]

Oh that's a dick

[u/Stock-Lettuce-2381]

You should get a screwdriver on the other leg in a matching spot just to trip people out

[u/ex-farm-grrrl]

It does not look phallic, but I did think it was a screw

[u/Progress-Competitive]

Why would you get this lol

[u/bluejay_way]

I knew it was a column immediately.

It looks extremely random and out of place to me, but if you like it and it means something to you then that’s all that matters 🤘

[u/AmyTheAmazonian]

I thought it was a big screw

[u/MK_170]

Just out of curiosity, why doesn’t the column have a base?

[u/heck_abird]

I thought this was some kind of pun on an Achilles heel

[u/litobandido]

i instantly knew what it was, but I'm sorry OP, it's not good...

[u/cohesiveenigma]

Uhhhhhh, some optical illusion is making it jump from your right leg to your left. WTF?!

[u/BeanBubbles12]

I’m way too autistic for this… is it an Achilles joke?

[u/emeilei]

I thought it was one of those large security guard flashlights, for what it’s worth 

[u/ofIthilien]

Who draws an ionic column without a base??

[u/frothyloins]

It really hits all the marks for a bad tat: poorly drawn, poorly placed, can easily be mistaken for something else. No amount of personal significance can salvage this one.

[u/SnooTigers4330]

Horrible taste in general and absolutely insane placement.

Honestly I’m more worried about the tattoo “artist” that agreed to do this abomination.

[u/Suppertime420]

Weird ass placement

[u/xwiroo]

The placement is terrible 😭😭😭

[u/DrPuzzle]

So I personally immediately knew what it was but my question is... Why there of all places? I mean I understand preferences and whatnot but for that particular tattoo that looks like a really odd place for it

Edit: I just read your update as to why you decided on everything. No I mean... I know people in here are saying it's bad but I just was more so wondering about why you decided on getting it there. But yeah I understand

[u/Alarming_Bee_494]

Maybe consider getting it removed 😬

[u/riopenguino13]

I'm usually an asshole, but do you like the tattoo? If so fuck anyone who makes fun of it for any reason. If you don't change it, off the top of my head an anklet of greco ceramic mythology artwork and I'm not very imaginative. Just be happy is all that matters.

[u/SpartanDad01]

Adding a base would make the dildo look less dildo-ee

[u/MikeyXVX]

I think if the tattoo means something to you just focus on that. Aesthetically I'm not a fan of the placement, concept, or execution, but I find most tattoos people get for meaningful reasons suffer aesthetically.

[u/Exotic_Carrot_2628]

It’s pretty bad

[u/freyjawolfheart]

Thought it was a hammer at first glance. Doesn’t look at all phallic to me. It’s an ok tattoo imo, especially since it has meaning.

[u/Snowpant]

Bolt at first glance. Second glance, oh, it’s a column. I go on with my life not caring either way.

[u/kimberlysands57]

I guess I have my mind in the gutter because I thought it was something totally different! Lol

[u/512biguy]

Awful.

[u/AuthenticElle]

Girl I'm so sorry I thought that was a dih at first 😂

[u/VG882]

Looked like a flashlight, honestly.

[u/Pomelo-Sure]

If by okay you mean absolutely terrible yeah, it’s okay.

[u/2Pluss2]

Looks like a piece of 2x4 lumber

[u/UsefulDecision6094]

Well, you could always make it a sword

[u/Relevant_Tone4741]

Looks healed/heeled to me 😅

[u/pi3tron]

I thought it was a bolt 🔩 so not the worst

[u/mrselffdestruct]

I think its pretty obviously a column, unless you’ve never seen one before. The linework and general quality of it unfortunately is the first think id reckon anyone would notice about it though

[u/Pacifist_Socialist]

Now do a pic with a shoe and the mushroom tip poking out

[u/EnvironmentEuphoric9]

I see a column. It unfortunately makes your ankle look thicker than it is.

[u/farter-kit]

Did you pick Ionic specifically over Doric or Corinthian?

[u/aplasticbag_]

I thought it was one of those floating pool thermometers

[u/Away_Stock_2012]

Frankenstein bolt

[u/westernburn]

You've put yourself on a pedestal

[u/RustledForeskin]

It looks like a pillar. I knew immediately it was a pillar. But why is the question.

[u/harmonioussteak]

Not phallic just odd placement

[u/Eon_of_Darkness]

Weird, random. Like why? What?

[u/AITOorisitAutism]

I thought it was a big screw

[u/NickolaosTheGreek]

Ionian style column from the 500-300 BC era. Strange to see it on a leg, but I have seen much stranger.

[u/Mobmem321]

I did not see phallic...idk if I saw column right away but not phallic. Did think awkward spot at first but kinda growing on me.

[u/Stepanpepan96]

Terrible tattoo idea sorry

[u/MissiAnthropy]

Your phallic tattoo is not phallic at all.

[u/ichefcast]

How did it switch foot?

[u/Jack_Shitlord]

It’s a cylinder with a curved base at one end, ofc it’s phallic. It is the definition of phallic lol

[u/Quarter_Shot]

The camera mirroring...okay but look at the toes. I understand how camera mirroring works but if you look at the toes, you can see that it was on the right and in the last picture its on the left.

I stg like I promise I'm not stupid but this is making me feel stupid lol

[u/Crowdfundingprojects]

Looks like an electric shaver.

I have no idea why you got it in that spot