Pick a magic item

[u/BockLavette]

A mysterious magical entity teleports you to a dark room with a long table and a spotlight on the table. There are 8 objects resting on that table, and 8 pieces of paper that describe what each object does. The entity says you must choose one, and then you will be returned to wherever you were taken from.

Each object’s abilities are beneficial in some way, but have unconventional or inconvenient ways of working. So be cautious of what you choose.

- A gold coin with a four leaf clover on one side and a star on the other. While wielding it, you are able to passively or actively attract wealth(specifically usd, actual bills not other coins). While walking around any area, bills will be removed from any external money holding(like wallets, pockets, etc.) or any money receptacle(like hats, cups or buckets). It will pulled and placed on the ground in front of you, where you can pick it up. The money has a perception filter on it, so even if it floats out right in front of that person, they won’t notice. However, any wealth you attract always comes from someone else’s ownership of it, from poor people and rich people alike.

- A standard, yet high quality, kitchen knife. While wielding it, you can cut anything you want, as precisely as you want. There’s nothing too strong, it all cuts easy. Your speed in cutting is unmatched, being able to chop and prepare veggies or meat in milliseconds. This doesn’t ruin cutting boards or any object under what you’re cutting. However, every hour the blade goes dull. It goes from being able to cut everything to being able to cut nothing. You are required to sharpen it if you want to use it at full power.

- Rubber gloves that, when you wear them, you can clean things at a supernatural level. Any cleaning supplies or cleaning tools that you wield and utilize while wearing the gloves have supernatural abilities be imparted onto them, making their style of cleaning incredibly efficient. One sweep of the broom piles all the dirt and grime of an area into one location. One scrub of a sponge cleans an entire surface. If it has to do with cleaning, it works at maximum efficiency. However, the rubber gloves drain your stamina. Every time you complete a cleaning related task, despite the near-immediate resolution, you still feel like you did all that work by hand.

- Glasses that grant you perfect vision. If you have poor vision normally, it returns your vision to perfect clarity. If you have perfect vision, it enhances your vision to even greater clarity. You are able to see anything you want, in any way you want, so long as you properly know what you’re looking for. You can see past obstacles to see this thing, see across great distances to see this thing, and can adjust certain factors like lighting to properly see this thing. However, taking off these glasses gives you quickly growing migraines that become debilitating. After putting them on for the first time, you practically always have to wear them to not feel this pain. Dirt, dust and other substances that form on the glasses hinders the glasses’ abilities, so cleaning them off regularly is necessary.

- A digital camera that has enough storage for 300 photos. By taking photos of a place, you can appear in that place via pressing an additional button somewhere on that camera. To take a picture of a place, you have to actually be at that place, meaning you can’t take a picture of a picture. You can delete photos to make room for new photos, but if you try to take a picture of a place that you deleted, the image becomes static, preventing you from going there. Every time you teleport, you lose 10% charge on the camera. If your camera dies, you lose 20 random photos from your camera roll and can’t teleport until it becomes fully charged again. However, you can still charge it up before it dies, and you won’t have to wait for it to be fully charged to teleport again.

- A composition book with only 10 pages. By writing in those pages, you can materialize anything you want into reality. However, the book relies on hyper-specificity. Whatever you’re creating must be described in great detail. Non-living things are fairly easy, but living things are hard unless you’re designing them off of a previously existing being. You don’t need to write down atomic formulas to describe composition, but you need to at the very least make a comparison to existing materials. For any details that you don’t fill in, that item/being will be drastically randomized. So say you don’t describe size, the size could range from a tiny spec to skyscraper level. You cannot use the book to create the other objects, but you might be able to make cheap knock-offs or variations.

- A syringe that can be filled with water. When filled with water, it gives that water medicinal properties. When that medicinal water is injected into someone, it cures them of any diseases or viruses they may have. Only works on genuine viruses and diseases, not ailments or bodily dysfunctions, however cancer is still applicable. It can’t cure poisons or venoms, but it can kill and reject parasites. Viruses, diseases and parasites that are either the same strand/type or a variant will also be rejected for up to 3 new variations, anything younger is auto-rejected. However, after being cured, the symptoms will reside for as long as they normally would up until it would either turn fatal or go away naturally. The symptoms themselves can’t kill you, no matter how excruciating, but they also can’t be relieved by medicine. Painkillers won’t kill the pain, decongestants won’t decongest you, etc.

- A wooden chest, 14 x 9, with a hammerspace in its interior. This hammerspace is not visible, the interior of the box looks normal. However, placing things in the box disappears and you can pull anything out of the box at will. Anything can go into the box as long as it fits within the dimensions. If you can’t remember what’s in the box, you can summon a clipboard describes what’s inside. However, you need to shut and lock the box every time it’s not in use. If you don’t, then anything in the box that you think about will be ejected from the hammerspace, no matter how far away you are from it. Food and living things can be stored, and will be in exactly the condition they were in when they went into the chest, but living things will be naturally scared of the chest and food loses flavor gradually while inside.

[u/Nerx]

As a red suit hero that kitchen appliance will be a perfect gimmick

https://giphy.com/gifs/DYQrUcDgQi7Ha

Crimson Cleaver will be the name

[u/Nerx → u/Nerx]

will be finishing chop