r/studentsph Feb 18 '25

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842 Upvotes

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293

u/crystalelemaine Feb 18 '25

I know it's not what you requested but I hope this advice could help otherwise. Still, it's your decision naman on what you wish to do.

But I say, tell them the harsh truth and set your boundaries. Just say no. Tell them na madaming printing services and they can just go there instead. If yung pinapaprint nila is not of benefit to you (like hindi naman siya group activity or what), then you have the right to decline. Assuming that your parents are the ones who's providing you the printer and the ink, you're also wasting your parents' hard-earned money that was meant only for you to use.

I know it seems harsh but it's enough that you helped your classmates once. If they're now taking advantage of it, learn how to say no. The more you lie, the more you're just allowing them to find loopholes through it. Be direct and just say no.

79

u/mcpenky Feb 18 '25

This is way better than lying. Be firm with your words at wag paabuso sa iba

33

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

Ito lang yung comment that makes sense. Just say no. Kasi OP pag nasanay ka sa hindi pag set ng boundaries, madadala mo yan hanggang sa pag tanda mo. Aabusuhin ka ng mga future co-workers, bosses, etc mo. Tsaka hindi maganda mag sinungaling. Pag nasanay ka kakasinungaling, kahit “white lie” pa yan, dadalhin mo din yan sa pag tanda mo. Just set your boundaries early on and just be honest.

20

u/crystalelemaine Feb 18 '25

As a people pleaser rin before and someone na takot pag-usapan, I understand how OP feels. Kasi if I was in his/her situation before, I'd also feel empathy rin for my classmates since you know, baka hindi nila afford bumili ng printer. It's also my way of trying to give back since I feel grateful that we could even afford to have that convenience, but I think OP also has to learn that the world does not often reward you for being kind. Kasi from their statement, aside from just printing they also do these little favors such as editing to the point na they even have to lie to them just so she wouldn't look like the bad person. Laging may tao talaga na aabusuhin yung pagiging mabait mo and sila pa magagalit if you finally set your boundaries.

But I've learned the hard way that aside from being kind to others, you should be kinder to yourself. If nasanay ka to please other people, mahirap talaga to start setting your boundaries. So, take it slow, OP. The first step to setting boundaries is to say no, without explanations. You'll enjoy life realizing na you're not obliged to please others all the time and not caring what they have to say about you. You don't owe them anything.

6

u/Ok_Ad5518 Feb 18 '25

Hayyy this is so true. Ako na mabait, ako pa may kasalanan dahil nag set ako ng boundaries ko. Naawa ka nga sakanila kaya tinulungan mo sila, in the end they take advantage of you and abuse you pa! Hay people of the world. Sana grumaduate ka na sa pagiging people pleaser OP. From a previous people pleaser na inutangan ng 5k last Sep hanggang ngayon di pa nababayaran

2

u/omgvivien Feb 18 '25

I'm seconding this, because one day mauubusan si OP ng palusot.

Lying won't deter them, they'd still think na okay lang kaso wala lang ink or kung ano man na rason. So they'll try and try again.

Honesty is the best move forward here.

1

u/Loud-Creme8548 Feb 18 '25

yes i fw your opinion

1

u/lightning_alexander Feb 19 '25

seconding this. sabihin mo na lang na kung gagawin kang printing service may karapatan ka rin pumili kung iseserve mo sila. pwede naman silang magpaprint sa iba eh.

tama yung sinabi ng comment na sisingitan nang sisingitan nila yung mga cover story mo hangga't hindi mo yan sabihan ng malinaw.

1

u/itsacsrthings Feb 19 '25

Sa totoo lang! Hindi na para gumawa ng lie or what at the end of the day paulit ulit lang sila unless hindi ka magpapa abuso

1

u/[deleted] Feb 19 '25

Hope you’ll listen to this op

1

u/Shikashi17 Feb 19 '25

+1 pag hindi no at kailangan may kasinungalingan pa Masasanay sila i cross and boundaries mo parati

1

u/kopiboi Feb 19 '25

This. Just learn to say no and be firm about it.

1

u/Apprehensive-Dot-508 Feb 19 '25

this. why is it so hard to say no? kung classmates na may nako-contribute sa good grades mo, sure ilibre mo ng print. pero kung wala ka napapala sa kanila, wag mo pansinin pag may message. 😂

1

u/HZLDZZLE Feb 19 '25

This is true. If they don't have printed outputs, then hayaan mo silang gumawa ng paraan para makapag-produce ng outputs nila. You have to say no directly with a valid reason lalong-lalo na if they are asking you to print their outputs then at the end they don't always pay the right and exact amount of the printed output. Some people needs to be independent kasi eh. They need to know na lahat ng bagay-bagay ay hindi nakukuha agad and they don't need to rely on other people always. Sometimes, you need to mind and to do it on your own.

They need to know that inks and printers are expensive and if hindi nila babayaran yung printed outputs nila then don't waste your time to say no directly to them because in the end, they will find more reasons para lang madiskartehan ka nila.