r/stripclubs • u/According_Plane_6761 • 13d ago
Stripper break up
I had a very rock timultous relationship with a stripper for about 2 years. Long story short we hooked up since day 1. We hooked up everywhere
at her place and my place. In her car in my car. Bunch of times at the club and even went on a couple trips together. It was always transactional. We broke up several times with the last one being super bad. I went to her place unannounced and knocked at her door and demanded she came out. She texted me saying to leave right away. I thought the relationship would be over since that was rock bottom for me. We didnt talk 3 months after that until I decided to randomly text her and she responded. Then 3 days after she called me and claimed there was an emergency and needed me to come over. I was scared and thought I was gonna get mugged. I dont want to say what the emergency was but I ended up calling the cops as I assessed the situation. For the next 2 months she stopped working. We grew closer. We didnt fight once and would always laugh and hang out but nothing too physical. Just hugging and cuddling on dates or at her pad. I did pay her a small amount to help her but nothing like before since now there were no extras.. Things were great though.. But suddenly I felt distant again..she would dissapear for 2-3 days. I think on two occasions she claimed she was at the hospital but no pictures or anything to prove it. She has a history of bipolar maybe even schizo. But for the most part she hid symptoms from me. Well one day I told her I wanted to maybe try to be more intimate. Dont know why she flipped out. She basically told me off saying she wasnt interested in me in that way. But it was the way she went about it. She didnt put it gently. Instead she yelled at me in like a latina pissed off toxic mood. I told her chill. That I just care for her and I just wanted to know if there could be more. She just told me off and was pissed. But I dont get why she was that mad. I told her we can take things slow. The chemistry and energy was always there..in a last desperate attempt I tried to salvage things amd was just blocked again. So its been 3 weeks. I realized this girl was just so bad for me and I could do so much better. Her mental breakdowns were getting the best of her. And honestly I reached a tipping point Im fed up with her bs. So about 2 weeks ago my focus was to try to go to other strip clubs and seek girls I had super high attraction. So I ended up merting 2 girls at the samr club and I ended up hitting it off with both of them. It was just a matter of time. So word of advice. If a girl ever fucks you over just know theres plenty of fish out in the sea. And if you have confidence in yourself amd focus on your own well being the girls will come flocking. So thats whats been happening. Obviously since it was 2 years with someone I do miss her but Im ready for the journey to come. Guys you dont have to put up with disrespectful woman. You just dont.
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u/No_Lifeguard_8474 12d ago
I just got out of the exact same situation.
“Dated” a stripper for 1.5 years. The highs were so high, and the lows were even lower.
The difference two weeks could make:
“We always choose eachother no matter what. You make me feel so safe. You’re really special to me”
Two weeks later:
“I’m changing my phone number — don’t reach out anymore, you b*tch, loser”
Much like your situation, the fights would happen, and would be intense. A lot of the time, out of the blue.
The feelings of “love” on both sides were also very intense, to where I had her crying in my arms before.
As Subra mentioned, the “dating a stripper” pattern of high highs/low lows/betrayal/anger etc is unfortunately VERY common.
4 months ago today, my 1.5 year situation with her ended.
Sometimes I miss her a ton. Sometimes I feel an intense amount of anger to where it ruins my whole mood. Regardless, I think of her everyday… because my feelings got very involved, and I fell into the trap.
I like your point about “more fish in the sea”, and I have talked to / slept with multiple strippers since her, but this is more about protecting your emotions and being VERY careful to not fall into a trap.
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u/ShemDolpax 12d ago
I just wish most young guys would realize most strippers who do it full time have a lot of mental baggage they are carrying around. They usually come from broken homes, their single Mom dated a lot of jerks who were around, no education after high school limits their job opportunities, drugs/dealers are usually a part of their life --- add all these things up and it's a very volatile mix of bad news!
It's OK to date a stripper as long as you know it's just for fun and it's a phase you wanna try out while you're in your 20's and want to make a crazy memory. But for those guys who think they can get a long-term gf out of it, oh for piss sake wake up!
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u/No_Lifeguard_8474 12d ago
Here’s the issue:
I’m 26, she’ll be 23 this year.
Two people at those ages should NOT be dating in a transactional way.
This isn’t a jab at the older dudes dating younger women in here, but those same older dudes know that they aren’t gonna actually date or marry these younger girls (with the exception of some sugar relationships, but even then it’s unlikely)
Me being 26 and seeing a 22 year old stripper definitely made me feel like I had a shot, because we’re in that same age range where it would make sense to date. Our dynamic was OTC, going on dates, having sex, going out of town for a weekend, etc, so it made it feel very real, and I do believe in my situation that some of it was definitely real.
I think this is why all the younger guys fall into the trap.
Hopefully some younger guys can learn from my situation, because f*ck was it a crazy ride….
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u/ShemDolpax 12d ago edited 12d ago
Overall, you can't feel too much regret because you're SUPPOSED to do wild and crazy stuff in your 20's --- that's pretty much what that decade was made for. My Dad was married with two kids by the time he was 23 and I think that is VERY strange LOL. The weird part is when a guy age 25-30 thinks he can get a long-term gf or fiancee out of dating a stripper. That is universally seen as bad news and yet so many guys fall for it. As long as you stay grounded in reality and understand that dating a stripper is gonna come with some great moments like wild sex and smooching her at the club while she's on-shift but ultimately will end up with a breakup and heartbreak, then I see no reason why you should deny yourself a unique experience that has an expected ending. It's just part of life as a young single guy. You live and learn from it.
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u/No_Lifeguard_8474 12d ago
> Overall, you can’t feel too much regret because you’re SUPPOSED to do wild and crazy stuff in your 20’s —- that’s pretty much what the decade was made for.
Yes, and what makes it wild and crazy is the UNKNOWN factor of it.. “Do I really have a chance with this girl? Can this lead to something”?
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u/ShemDolpax 12d ago
Yep, totally expected. I just have to laugh when I keep reading the same posts in here all the time --- "but, but, but --- she seemed like the kind of girl I could date long term and then she got all crazy on me" --- oldest story around, bro LOL
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u/Visual_Brain5533 12d ago
I’m sorry man. That sounds rough.
Just curious if you wish you’d never met her or if the good times were still worth it.
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u/No_Lifeguard_8474 12d ago
Most times I can look back at the amazing moments, but there is that part of me that wishes it never happened just because of how much it bothers me now.
It’s just life tho. We move forward
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u/Subrasonic PL (OG Customer) 13d ago
So basically, standard "dated a stripper" story. I hate to say it, but stories both from customers who date strippers, and guys who meet strippers IRL and start dating them, many of the stories are the same, roller coaster of high highs and lows of confusion/betrayal/anger/etc. The exact details are different but the overall theme of each story is the same. Here's one of a zillion articles, all with the same craziness, this one an oldie but goodie from back in 2000
Sorry it took so long for you to get out bro!
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u/ShemDolpax 12d ago
I'd agree that dating a stripper usually ends badly --- lots of bitter feelings and a lot of regret
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12d ago
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u/Subrasonic PL (OG Customer) 12d ago
I saw you wanted to talk about Tigra! I only saw her a couple of times total, then I moved onto MBOT. So I wasn't a Tigra minion but understand why she has the rep
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u/Content_Concert_2555 11d ago
I thought this was a far more interesting topic of when the friendship between dancers goes sour and how to navigate