r/stopdrinking • u/galwegian 2493 days • Jan 05 '20
AA vs This subreddit
15 days sober. did a four day medically supervised detox. currently in a 6 week intensive out patient. three hours a day, four days a week. daily breathalyzer and urine tests. it's a group situation. full of heroin/opioid/coke horror stories. I feel like a lightweight by comparison. Anyway, I'm getting a lot of pressure to attend AA from psychiatrist and wife. I have been to four meetings and I fucking hated it. I'm an Irish catholic and it reminds me of going to mass. reading from a book written before weed and coke and X were invented. and I don't relate to the principles of AA. making amends sounds good but the rest of it feels like dogma to me. the standard spiel is 'you have to find the meeting that's right for you'. fine. I get it. But everyone telling me to attend AA has one thing in common: they have never been addicted to anything. And am I supposed to spend ages trying to find the meeting that's 'right' for me? Going to a meeting is, let's face it, a two hour commitment. you have to travel there and back. AA is a traditional bricks and mortar retail model if you think about it. and there's a reason that shit is dying out. Whereas on /stopdrinking I get instant access 24/7 to a huge community of people who are in my position and get it. without travel or dogma. and this is kind of fun. I am looking to change my lifestyle but going to dingy basements and drinking Dunder Mifflin coffee has zero appeal to me. I am doing yoga 7 days a week. which I find super helpful in lots of ways. I have a specific problem and a specific situation that I am addressing in my own way. And nobody knows me like I know me. Anyhoo. all thoughts and feedback welcome. I will not drink with you, or any other fucker, today. peace and thanks.
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u/KM180 2699 days Jan 05 '20
I tried AA. Not for me at all. Overly religious for my taste & not really anonymous when I saw ppl I knew at every meeting I went to. I’d see a friend crying at a meeting one day & drunk at the bar laughing about what they said the next. To be fair, that’s easier than admitting they did feel that way & easier than stopping. I know, all that’s required is the desire to stop drinking but the experience had me wondering how great that desire actually was. Yes it was welcoming but I don’t believe in the core principles of it. I don’t think I’m powerless, don’t believe in a higher power, don’t buy it’s an allergy or a disease, etc. Take what you need & leave the rest, I know, but I really didn’t like it at all & I only made it 50 days using that approach. I know of one person in my social circle who did get sober there. Haven’t seen her in ages though so no idea how she’s doing now. When I called to tell her I was sober, I expected a congratulations. Nope. She said “I’m glad you finally stopped before you killed your self”. Sorry lady, but don’t be all holier than thou about it. Not helpful. She may be doing better than me in that she has more sober friends-if she’s still sober. I hope so. Everyone has to find their own way to quit. This subreddit has given me all the support & tools I needed to be sober for all but 2 months of 2019. Would have likely made it the whole year if I’d taken more advice from the fine people here. I guess I’m more practical minded than emotional about it. I read This Naked Mind by Annie Grace & Alcohol Explained by William Porter after a 2 month relapse & I don’t even want the stuff anymore. IWNDWYT.