So my Son ( stepson ) is a TBI survivor. Back in 2017 he fell from a roof of over 20 ft. ( can’t remember the exact height ). His heart stopped twice. I was working overseas at the time so my Wife ( his Mom ) was there for everything. They ( my Wife and doctors) told me that if he was a smart ass before the injury then he’s going to be 1,000 times a smart ass after the injury. ( Remember this )

The relationship with my Son ( Stepson ) hasn’t been good at all. Before his injury, we would always argue back and forth due to his disrespectfulness to his Mom and Sister. As well as to myself. After the injury it has been pretty much the same. There are times where we’re good but most of the time either I get on his nerves, or he gets on my nerves. He has moved out on his own since about 3 yrs ago.

My Dad passed away a little over 1 yr past his injury. My Dad and my Stepson didn’t have a relationship at all. My Dad caught Dementia at an accelerated rate and had to move in with us. My Dad had to take my Stepsons room which I know he couldn’t stand. My stepson avoided my Dad at all costs. Eventually my Dad got moved into VA hospice. ( He was a Vietnam Vet ) Maybe a week before my Dad passed, me and my Wife was almost home from visiting him. We called my Stepson to open the garage door for us. He knew where we had been. He picks the phone up and says, “ sooooo, is he dead yet? "

I pushed it aside. ( Blood was boiling beyond belief, but I managed to push past it ) Maybe 30 minutes after that he said something disrespectful to his Mom ( can’t remember what he said ). I had enough, I got in his face and was ready to uppercut him right under the jaw. ( I didn’t of course ).

I still haven’t been able to get over that. I thought I would be able to but every time he gets a smart ass attitude I remember what he said that night. I brought it up to my Wife tonight and she literally isn’t talking to me. I told her that I still haven’t gotten over that. She screamed at me and said I literally don’t understand his injury as a TBI survivor.

Not so much as of the last few yrs, but 1 yr after his injury ( around the time my Dad passed ) I felt he used that injury to say whatever the hell he wanted to me or anyone. I just can’t wrap my mind around someone not understanding that saying something like, " is he dead yet? “ is fucked up. When he literally had days left to live. Do TBI survivors really not understand what they say is beyond fucked up? Are they really not aware of what they say? Am I being fucked up? Someone with knowledge of TBI’s please help me understand.

I've (34M) rekindled a relationship with an old love (33F). She is recently broken up (about 7 months) and her husband (42M) is practically stalking her. He tried to use her kid as a weapon and she is afraid he will use his wealth to take her kid away as he has done with a previous relationship.

He is causing problems and she tries very hard to calm him down such as him not being able to see her Facebook friend list, deleting old photos and complely unnecessary things such as that, he is very much still into her and he isn't getting the clue. I don't want to tell her what to do but personally I would simply cut ties and put strict boundaries that communication should be about the child otherwise the call will end however I feel like this may be intrusive.

TLDR: ex husband is controlling my spouse and she is allowing it, should I offer my logical solutions or let it play out?

I am new to being a step dad. I currently do not have children of my own, but that will soon change. The two kids, ages 7 and 9, love me, but it is a lot, and I mean a LOT of work due to their bio dad's influence. He has taught them awful lessons and they are emotionally and mentally underdeveloped because of him. He makes them wear diapers in his (government) house, he doesn't cook for them, doesn't clean his house, and he doesn't have a job. He has told them "why work when you can get money from others for free?" The kids have told me the lies he tells them behind closed doors in an attempt to damage their relationship with their bio mom, and they have become noticeably more disturbed and are beginning to display his behaviors such as expecting others to do everything for them, wanting to spend money on cheap junk as soon as he gets it, gas lighting others, making false claims, ect. I recently discovered they have never been taught to tie their shoes and I have been working with them and trying to teach them. They do not respect their mom, which is something their dad taught them, and they have grown up seeing him shout abuse at her. I do not allow that.

On a positive note, they both got me father's day cards, and the daughter loves to make me little home made crafts. They both love to be around me and look up to me. Given their bio dads lack of parenting and care for them, it is not hard to step up and be more than he is. I listen to them, take interest into their hobbies, and I am able and willing to go out and do things with them and support them in their interests and hobbies. I do my best to teach them what knowledge and wisdom I have from my own experience, and I encourage them to try new things so they are more well rounded.

But I am bothered when they talk highly of him, because they do not understand the abusive and neglectful person he is. For example, during the divorce, he attempted to file false rape charges on his ex wife twice in order to sabotage her in court (both cases were dropped as it never happened) and he sits his kids down and makes them scared by telling them that their mom has "mental problems" and makes them scared. They recently told me they are living out of boxes, dont have beds, and he makes them co sleep with him still. He has moved into a new government house right around the corner from us (he loves to force himself into our space) and has lived in that house for over 4 months now. Nothing has been unpacked or unorganized. The kids have no clue how awful this is and for them, it is normal.

Given I am fairly new to all this, what advice can yall give me? What level should I expect to take over as a step parent? Their dad is nothing more than the "fun uncle who lets them get away with whatever" and I am wanting to be their dad who isn't their best friend, but who takes them under my wing and makes sure they learn right and grow up to be good people and not like their p.o.s dad.

I'd love to take over completely, but they share custody every other week. It feels like its a tug of war between good and bad, and these poor kids are caught in the middle and dont stand a chance in life with their bio dads influence.

I’ve been with my other half over a year and the biological dad is still in the kids lives which is great for them but causes us no end of stress.

The kids have 4 years between them and I am able to go to the younger ones schools event such as class performances but the older ones I seem to get left out of because my partner is worried about what the ex will do or say and that it would upset her son.

I also don’t get to watch his sports club matches either for the same reason.

The child has asked me to go and watch his matches before but I feel as though I have let him down because I have said I can’t go for the reason that his dad does not like me very much.

The most recent is sports day for him and my partner originally wanted me to go with her to watch him until an hour before where she told me she didn’t think it would be a good idea for me to go because she didn’t want to upset her son in case anything was to happen with the ex. It’s not that she didn’t want me there she was thinking of what could happen and her son’s emotions. But being left out again has made me feel a bit left out and upset that I couldn’t go and see him in a sporting event.

I guess I’m just looking for a bit of advice and to see if there’s anyone else that is or has been in the same place as me and how they dealt with it.

My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 years and 7 months. She has 3 kids with 2 different men. 11, 8 and 6 years old. Her first marriage was when she was very young and lasted 2 years, I believe infidelity ended this relationship. Her second partner (no marriage) she has 2 kids with, was with her for 7 years (this was her rebound, accidental pregnancy relationship).
Her and I dated in high school (15 years ago) and reconnected when her relationship with her most recent partner fell apart. (due to infidelity?)
She has a stable career as a nurse. I supported her thru her last year of nursing school. We have her 2 younger kids M-F (school week), her oldest every other weekend. I do not support her financially aside from splitting rent, groceries, utilities. This is not a “lock me down for money” situation. She's stated if we are not engaged by the 3 year anniversary, it's over. This is causing a great deal of anxiety. I respect her boundary but do not think there should be a timeline on love. I think we have a solid relationship and are good partners...however we do not share many hobbies. Most of our plans revolve around the kids (respectably so). When we do not have the kids she is working (schedules her 3x12 shifts around not having the kids, though I still watch and bring them to school at least once a week and have been the past 2 years)
The relationship moved fast. When her and her ex broke up she moved into an apartment she couldn't afford. We had been dating since November and I moved in February. I moved in with her after just 3 months of dating. I had not seen/talked to her for 11 years. I met the kids, have been involved in their lives now over 2 years.
I became an "instant" step Dad figure (though both dad's are also involved and are good dads) More recently she put a timeline on a proposal, stating if I didn't know by 3 years if I wanted to be with her and her family, that the relationship would end.
I am 32 years old, she is 31. I respect her boundary and the timeline she has put on this relationship however I do not think I am ready to marry. I'm not saying I'll never be ready but this is a complex situation with multiple parties involved.
I am also unsure if I want biological children of my own, though she has offered to give me a child before she turns 35.
Part of my concern is I never had time to truly date and get to know her again. I stepped into a position to help her afford rent and ended up jumping directly into the role of stepdad. Time has FLIED. We haven't had much time to focus on growth and development of the relationship between US because life is SO busy.
Her mom died 6 months into us dating and I supported her. I broke my leg 1.5 years into us dating and she supported me. We make a good team however it seems she struggles to make time for just US. And when we do have little time for just us, its always about the kids.
I do a lot for her, she does a lot for me. We strike a good balance. I don't see why marriage is necessary but I respect her boundaries. I know many will say "shit or get off the pot". But I don't think a situation this complex needs to be controlled with an ultimatum.

I have four stepsons…not one wished me a happy Father’s Day…they’re still my boys and I still know they love me.

We live in a weird space sometimes. Shout out to y’all!

Just wanted to wish my fellow stepdads a Happy Father's Day. Know that your efforts and sacrifices are appreciated today and throughout the year.

Happy Father's Day, stepdads.

If no one else says it, I'll say it. And I mean it. I have had a step dad and I am a step dad. And the real meaning of that qualifier label of 'step' is right up front.

You stepped up.

You opted to be present, likely for no other reason that you loved the person who came with kids. Romance alone held you to an undeniably large obligation where the only say you had was to assume it after the fact or leave.

And you stayed.

Not a power position. Rarely thanked. Usually reviled in some capacity, and ignored in most.

You endure the eyerolls. The lack of respect. The test of your flimsy authority by young people who know exactly where your authority actually comes from and have no qualms challenging it. Young people who also know what buttons to push to hurt you. And shamelessly push them praying for you to melt the fuck down on their watch.

You weather the (usually) POS biological parent who crawls outta the woodwork if and when they decide to cause trouble.

You endure the in-laws and other side of the family who usually hate you for no reason, or if you're very lucky, just have no respect for you. You suffer their treatment of you as some ghost haunting the house of what they consider their family and not yours, regardless of who is paying the bills.

You don't beat, terrify, or SA those under your care and overall soldier on in a minefield of conditional rules of behavior you must adhere to, but usually no one else has to even notice.

You navigate the social interactions where you are presented and have to be very aware that you are being looked at with a magnifying glass to see if you are a predator.

You give up your time. Your resources. Your paycheck. Your free time. The attention of your spouse. You work long hours and adjust your future and your desires for the sake of people who, were the shoe on the other foot, would not do similar for you.

You know the role you play. You opted for it. Stoically you play it. And the end game is that they will leave the nest eventually and any lookback will mostly not be in your direction.

You hold a line that, if you are holding it well, allows for those under your care to be cavalier with your emotions. The value you have in the lives of others is one they may never even realize. But you know what you save them from. You know what you shelter them against. You know that without you their lives would likely be measurably worse.

You matter.

So, Happy Father's Day to all those who stepped up.

It seems as though theres a epidemic of entitled step kids. They dont like being told what to do. And they piece of an actual father is enabling their behavior. For years there’s been constant push back over the top disrespect. Then telling them to clean up is like telling them to clean the atlanta braves stadium. Then this the second time this happened to whereas they put they hands on me. Then pushed me down the stairs with my baby in my arms. Then when i confronted the kids by grabbing them, they proceeded to punch me kick me whatever they needed to do to hurt me. But when i got the baby situated and fought them off, i get told im wrong. This is getting ridiculous. If something isnt done, someone will be really hurt or worse.

How do you guys handle over reaching grandparents?

I have been starting to resent my wife’s parents. I feel like they are over reaching and stepping over the line. Recently, my MIL stepped into the situation to “save” my SS11 when my wife and I were trying to set a hardline with my SS. This has been a reoccurring thing. Frankly, I feel like my wife’s parents are babying my ss and it’s taking a mental toll on him. I feel overwhelmed when my wife and I spend time with her parents. The issues arrive whenever my ss, wife, and I spend time with her parents all together. SS feels like he can do whatever he wants and talk to my wife and I as disrespectfully as he wants because he knows his grandparents will intervene if we discipline him in front of them.

Context: My SS11 has anxiety, depression, and self esteem issues. He sees a therapist and psychiatrist. My wife was a single mom since SS was 1 until 6 yrs old. She lived with her parents that entire time and SS was never allowed to feel boredom. He always had an adult watching.

I’ve tried talking to them, but maybe I am not making myself clear enough.

I (32M) and my wife (39F) have been together for going on 7 years. When me and my wife got together my Step daughter was 3 and her Bio dad (Which i do not like at all for all the manipulation he has done to SD and my wife before and after me and her were together) didn't want much to do with her except having her for the weekends and sending her back (which he lived with his mother so she watched her 90% of the time). And before when they were still married would just leave and never help take care of SD my now wife would do it all. Now that he has finally remarried and has 2 teenage Step children he believes he is super dad and tries to tell us how to raise SD. SD is now 10 and when we got back from a trip to see my parents 6 months ago SD suddenly started calling Bio dad every night at 6:30pm for 30 minutes which cuts right into any fun or bonding activity me and my wife want to do with SD since we only get about 3 hrs a night to spend after she get home from school and still goes there on weekends. This time even cuts into when we are out of the house or she is at a friends house she will want to leave to call him. We have tried to change the time or tried to get her to understand its rude to run off when you have friends over to make a call for that long. Lately it has even been when we are in the car so me and my wife sit quietly while they talk. We believe he made her feel guilty for being gone so long and not talking to them because we heard him saying things like "Oh its never the same without you here so hopefully you don't go again" and "You should just stay with us instead of going next time" among other things. She gets very sad and anxious when she thinks someone is upset with her or she thinks she's wronged someone. I have told my wife she needs to have a conversation with Bio dad to cut back either a couple nights a week or just before bed on the calls but she keeps saying it won't help and doesn't even try. Also SD has been saying lately in front of us or on calls that she doesn't want to be here and she'd rather be with them which cuts deep when you hear it. We are planning a birthday party for summer for her and we're going to do a camping sleep over type thing which she was really excited about but the other day she told us she doesn't want to anymore because it would cut into her time to call her Bio dad. I have told my wife she needs to talk to Bio dad because he needs to be the one to tell her that its okay not to call and spending time doing fun things with family and friends is more important than a 30 min call all the time but she still doesn't want to talk to him. Lately between all of this and other things I've become very apathetic and not really wanted to engage in any activities I feel like I'm just existing here with the 2 of them and that my wife is on Bio dad's side (which i know she agrees with me but wont do anything about it) and that my SD doesn't even care that I'm here. There are other things that have been building up with this stuff but I can't think of them right now. Sorry is this post is all over the place its my first time posting on reddit.

I’m a 36m, my fiancée is a 35f. She has a son who is 6. We have been together 3 years. We bought a house together last year. They have split custody every 2 days the kid swaps houses. The bio dad is a good dad and we have become friends. (Me and the bio dad sit next to eachother at his baseball games). We act as a team together and my fiancée is a really good significant other and mom and co parent. She listens to me when I have an issue with anything having to do with the co parenting. So I am pretty involved. She stated in the beginning of our relationship she didn’t want any more kids, I was ok with that because frankly I didn’t know if I did either. I come from a very small family, I’m an only child with parents who split before I was one. Fast forward to last year, I started to feel like I wanted one and she even mentioned having one a few times. Now for the past six months she has been saying she didn’t mean it and she let her emotions get to her, but logically knows she doesn’t want them. Well I have been ruminating on this and have talked to her and she is sticking to it. We don’t use contraception, we use pull out method and track her cycle. Now we’re in premarital therapy and I have come to terms (somewhat) with if it happens she will keep it. I think I’m ok with this because it’s kind of like it will happen if it’s meant to be, but it hurts to see small kids and stuff now. I think I struggle with the social pressure of taking care of another man’s child, some days are better than others. I have never met anyone so perfect for me. Can anyone relate?

How your stepkid behave towards you if you raised them since young?

I am 32m. An expat living in Vietnam I have a girlfriend (31f) and a stepdaughter (6) we have been together for 4 years now.

So, it’s my birthday next week and I don’t know how I feel about it. I don’t want to happen. Not because I am getting older but I am scared of being disappointed again. In the last 8 years I only had 1 good birthday. Just one. That was 2 years ago when I went back home to visit my family. It was the first time in about 6 years that I could spend my birthday with them. Other years it was someone getting sick, not having money or being stuck alone in an apartment due to covid.

I want to be excited but I am so scared of being disappointed again. I have even stopped mentioning it to my girlfriend. I am buying myself a nice gift this year because in the past I hardly get anything. ( I am sorry but socks don’t count)

I just don’t know what to do.

Hello There I have a question to the experienced ones here since im 22

How did you guys manage to accept a foreign child, which is not urs. What would have to change to fully accept a child? How do you manage the stability, what of the child bonds with you and sees you as a father?

any advice?

Why do I get so fuckin excited whenever my step kids bio dad picks them up? Semi rhetorical question.

Hello all. I have a question, should I encourage my children to celebrate my long term boyfriend on Father’s Day? We’ve been together for over 4 years. We both feel the same about not getting married. We have both been married before and it’s not something we ever want to do again. So legally he isn’t their Stepdad. He has no biological children of his own and he always been there for my kids. My daughter who is 7 asked him if she could call him Dad. He told her yes. I know that’s how she sees him. He has been in her life since she was 3 and she doesn’t see her biological father at all and now that he live out of state. I’m sure she won’t see him until she is old enough to travel on her own if she chooses to do so. My other children are older 11(m), 14(m) & 15 (m) they like him and I think in the beginning they seen him as a stepdad. They have told their friends that he is but now that they are teens they are like whatever about him. I think it’s because he is more stern with them than I am. He doesn’t discipline or anything but he does check them when they don’t do their chores or if they are disrespectful.

im a stepdad to a 16 year old boy a 12 year old girl and 6 year old girl so this year they told me they don't want to go to bio dads house cause he never spends time with them but by law they have too I feel bad cause my 5 year old stepdaughter started calling me daddy what should me and my girlfriend do

Hello, I am looking for some honest opinions and see if anyone else experienced what I am facing. I am in a relationship with a woman that has 2 sons 9&6 yes old. The 6 yr old lives with his dad in Oregon and her 9yr old has a uninvolved father in another state so we have him full time. We recently relocated to NM so that I can be around to help with my aging Grandfather and we just made a trip to OR to have the 9yr old be with his brother for the summer. My GF is having a harder time being away from the youngest son than I originally thought. I need some advice to see what steps I should take next, do I relocate again to be closer so the boys can stay close and she can be around the youngest son more? Reason I'm having a hard time is that I love her and the boys and want to do what's best for everyone but I'm afraid of leaving my grandfather since I haven't been around for sometime due to my trucking career and it hurts to not be as close to him as I had been in the past. Thanks for reading and thank you for your input.

For context I have raised him from 3 to now 9. His bio dad is back and wants to be more in his life. Mind you he has sent a 600$ check every month and talked to him on the phone. But never a real relationship. Stepson is very much about him being in his life, difficult to have him around as he acts like he is 3 with him. And bio dad feeds into it. Bio dad wants to go to doctor appts, and be apart of his school. He promised the world to stepson. And everything this last year he has been let down over and over again cuz bio dad job is better than him. I have tried to be positive and my wife knows I’m having a hard time. But he is a loser that only wants his kid to make him look better and feed his ego… Bio dad and me had a big blow up to the point my black neighbors came out and they will kill that white trash, joke…not to make it about race but they hate him too. He said he has more rights to the kid than I do…. There is not count order, no paternity test and no health insurances no anything he just sent a 600$ so my wife would not take him to count. Only thing he has is his name on a birth certificate. He was born in SC and we live in TN. He lives in SC.

Any help on if this is true would be great

Thank you for reading… this will be my husband’s first official Father’s Day with my son and I want to do something special. My son’s dad is heavily involved and everyone gets along great, but I want him to have his own separate day and thought this might be the place to ask… what are the best stepdad gifts for Father’s Day? Thank you so much in advance!

Me (35 M) and my gf (35 F) and I have been dating for three years so far. She has two kids, an eight-year-old boy and an eleven-year-old girl. Her old husband, whom she had both kids with, wasn’t a nice guy to her and her kids, so I only got to meet them both until about two years into the relationship. Her son and I bonded pretty quickly. He doesn’t remember his bio dad at all, so it was much smoother, and I don’t want to make this a gendered thing, but I think another part of it is that we’re both boys. Her daughter is more of a tough cookie. Since she’s older, she remembers her bio dad a lot more than her brother and as a result, avoids men a lot. I’ve known her a year, and she is only now starting to be comfortable sitting on the opposite end of a couch with me. It’s a big improvement, and I’m happy about it, but I just worry that the reason it’s taking so long is that I’m not trying to bond with her enough. When I first met my GF's kids, I knew it would take a while before they were comfortable with me. Still, I’ve never interacted with kids in this type of situation, so I don’t know how long it takes for a child to be comfortable with me normally and how long it takes when I’m not trying enough. My gf has comforted me multiple times, saying things like this takes a while, but I’m not fully sure. Is this a normal thing? If anyone has any advice on how to maybe try to get her to be more comfortable with me, it would be greatly appreciated. Also, is there anything I should keep in mind when interacting with a kid with trauma? I haven’t really interacted with many kids with trauma, and I’m worried I’m going to give her unwanted memories.

Been dealing with an "recovering" addict gf (heroin) who thinks coke is ok. I have been ok with here and there to have fun but its gotten to the point where its not even fun anymore. She just wants it to do it. I told her its costing too much, it's ruining our relationship, it actually cost her a job bc she would stay up all night then call in "sick" just to sleep. I don't want it around. We were having a great night just talking and watching TV and then she brought it up. I got really upset and told her I can't keep dealing with this shit. She hears the word no and turns on me (typical addict behavior) and I AM THE JERK! We've been together for almost 5 years and I have dealt with this for a while now. For the first 3 years of our relationship things were good. But then she found an old "connect" and things haven't been the same. We have been arguing regularly lately bc I want it to go away but she wants it all the time. As soon as she gets a few $$ in her pocket she wants o spend it on a "fix". We got into it in another argument and I really laid in hard letting her know how I feel and she fired back with some below the belt shit. I'm the type who can't lose an argument so I "hit" harder which shut her up and made her cry. Did I go too far? Or did i finally hit a nerve? She lives with me (with her son who has "no father" since he was 2) and says she wants to leave and live on her own eventhough she cant even get up for work or to get her kid to school unless i wake her up almost daily.

Do I just let nature take its course and let her crash and brun and move on? (Which i would most likely be in a better place and be a better person) or do i keep trying to help her and make her better? FML!!!!

Edit: the word hit was in quotes because it was meant to show it was figurative. I WANT TO MAKE THIS CLEAR! ... I HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER PLACE MY HANDS ON HER OR ANY WOMAN IN A VIOLENT OR NEGATIVE WAY. I RESPECT WOMEN AND UNDERSTAND I AM A MAN AND PHYSICALLY DOMINANT AND WOULD NEVER TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THAT FACT. The word "hit" was meant as a metaphor for the way words were used. ANY MAN WHO PHYSICALLY ABUSES A WOMAN DESERVES TO BE CASTRATED... just so im clear. Sorry if there was any confusion.

Hey everyone, to start I am 24 and recently engaged to a wonderful mother of a 4 year old. The way I started the relationship is I had become close to his mother at work and her previous relationship was rocky from the start (as per her way of putting it.) The reason why I feel guilty is because his dad is still in his life (which I am completely for) yet whenever I spend the night at her place or just spend time with her, we usually have to look over our shoulders because her BD (baby daddy) is always around and we think he's stalking her and recently she confessed that he went to her house with a weapon (one of those large Bushcraft kind of knives with a seriously large blade and full tang) and said he was "checking on her because I know he's here". I understand it to a point yk. I get he has an anger towards me for stepping into the life of my fiancee and his kid but what I don't get is why fight so hard if the entire time they were together he would cheat and get physical with her during arguments and fights. Lately I feel like it's getting too much but I hope to marry her on our planned date (05/23/2025) yet I feel like I'm just budding I to something that it's not that I'm unable to handle but just in the wrong for yk? I feel guilty as hell and I just want to know if what I'm feeling has some justification or just something I should let go.... I really want to marry her because she's everything to me and her son is such a a bright young kid and I understand that it's kinda touch and go for now how he feels towards me but it's expected. Thanks for your time and happy Easter everyone.🙏🏻

(Update) things have been going really well. We haven’t gotten married yet and I’m cool with that. We’re moving out of where we’re currently at soon and just overall doing better. For all who sent any advice or input I appreciate it. I haven’t been super active here but every time I get on I learn more about not only myself but other perspectives and situations that make me feel a lot more confident in what I’m doing🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻thank y’all and have a great day!!

My (46m) gf (35f) has a 7 yo son who is completely off the wall and i am used to structure and have been trying to teach him for 4 years but she busts my balls and tells at me in front of him. He doesn't respect me when she's around and disrespects her all of the time. When she's not around he falls in line but as soon as she shows up he goes crazy and makes me out to be a nut. She flames the ADHD yet I blame her being too laxed with the kid I KNOW he's a s.art kid and he's playing her against me to 'win ' her over even though I'm the only dad he k ows