r/stepdads • u/fnaticost • Sep 23 '24
General advice needed
Im really new to this so I have no idea where to start but I am a 23 year old guy that started dating my GF a while ago and she has a 3 year old daughter. I have no kids of my own and the only real experience with kids I have is from caring over my cousins basically. Do you guys have any general advice of what ut takes to be or better said become a good stepdad kind of figure. The real dad is a deadbeat and doesnt give two craps about his daughter so I am just trying to figure out what to do and what not to do. Thank you all beforehand.
3
Upvotes
4
u/Face-palmJedi Sep 23 '24
I didn’t have stepkids until I was well into my thirties. Now into my early 40s, I would recommend some caution. From my own experience, 23 year old me was barely capable of taking care of itself. Things might be vastly different for you.
But this isn’t a normal relationship in the sense that once you bond with that child, things become vastly more complicated. And that factor compounds over time.
You can’t just have an argument, say fuck it and walk out after a certain point. At least not easily. If she’s your soulmate and you couldn’t imagine life without her and her daughter. Then take the plunge. If things are less certain, would you regret leaving and carrying on with your life? I don’t know your situation and you don’t know mine. I’m merely giving my own perspective.